Tear Jerker / The Ugly Barnacle

  • Everyone died. Everyone. You. Your friends. Your family. Everyone.
    • It gets worse than that! The story doesn't specifically say it was everyone from a specific frame in time. Just "everyone". Which means anyone who ever existed on any plane of time or space is dead because of this barnacle.
    • It's also possible that the world died slowly. After all, it didn't say how fast or how peacefully everyone died...
  • The fact that the story didn't help at all.
  • It ended. It's all over.
  • The barnacle was so ugly that it never had any friends. How can you not weep over his plight?
  • Once, there was an ugly barnacle. Once, and never again...
  • There was an ugly barnacle. But not anymore...