Tear Jerker / Roseanne

WARNING: Spoilers are unmarked.

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The original series

• In the season 1 episode Slice Of Life, 11-year-old Darlene suffers a ruptured appendix and has to have emergency surgery, right during her baseball game and not long after having a fight with her mother. Rose and Becky feel so bad afterwards. When Becky calls to check up on Darlene, Dan answers and her voice is audibly cracking from wanting to cry. Dan cheers Becky up by telling her a few dad jokes.
• The final episode. In the end, Roseanne confesses that all of the events since Dan's heart attack were made up. In fact, Dan died that day. The final shot shows an apathetic-looking Roseanne sitting in front of the TV, indicating that she might have lost her lust for life. Thus the series ends on a bitter note.
  • However, there's something of a Hope Spot: If you take that scene along with the voice-over right before, it sounds like she only briefly gave into food and depression, but got out of her funk and chose to be alive, whereas Darlene's baby who was born prematurely had no choice but to fight for her life and survived. It makes that last scene on the couch more of a Bittersweet Ending.
• Before Darlene's wedding, she has a heart-to-heart with her father, in which he talks about her future and avoiding lost opportunities. The anguish and resignation in Dan's voice is more poignant when you realize that, from the last episode, we find out that this takes place just before his fatal heart attack.
  Darlene: I'm not going to miss any opportunities. David and I are still young enough, so they'll be plenty of time...
  Dan: No..nononono, you see that's where you're wrong, Darlene. Everyone thinks that there is plenty of time to do whatever they want. Believe me, there's not. Stuff happens.
  Darlene: What stuff?
  Dan: I don't know. Any kind of stuff. All kinds of stuff. See, you plan things, and the clock keeps ticking, and you never do them. And, suddenly, DJ's in high school, and you're having a baby...I haven't talked to my dad in two years.
  • Their very last words to each other before they walk down the aisle:
    Darlene: Are you ready to give me away?
    Dan: No, I'm not.
• "Heart & Soul" has a lot of this. First, Jackie tries to comfort Roseanne after Dan goes to the hospital and all Roseanne can say is "I've been with him since I was 16 years old". Then there's her and Dan's desperate prayers later on...especially Dan's.
• The episode around the birth of Darlene's baby, but especially the scene when all the Conner/Harris women gather to take her off life support and Darlene breaks down. Both Sara Gilbert and Johnny Galecki pull out all their acting chops.
• The scene in the fifth season, after Dan gets home from jail and Jackie calls him out for beating up Fisher. It's both hilarious and tear-jerking, especially Jackie says Roseanne's always helping her with her problems, then Dan responds "It's a big job; we had to expand the department."
  • Similarly, the series of scenes where the family discovers that Jackie has been abused by Fisher is tear-jerking. Darlene accidentally finds out by opening the bathroom door while Jackie is inside; Jackie's anguished screams of "CLOSE THE DOOR!", coupled with Darlene's genuinely stunned face, begin the painful moments. When Roseanne demands that Jackie tell her what happened, her sister tries to make excuses, only to eventually completely break down, sobbing hysterically in shame and fear.
    Jackie: [to Roseanne] Shut up! You don't know the whole story! He's been under a lot of pressure lately; there's no work! And I told him that he should look for a job at a bigger company, and he told me that I didn't believe in him, he told me a million times when he gets in a mood like that, that I should just walk away and I didn't! [bursts into tears] I just kept pushing him and pushing him!
  Roseanne: [hugging Jackie] Don't say anymore.
• The knock-down drag-out fight Dan and Roseanne have after his heart attack, in which he won't change the unhealthy habits that caused it in the first place. It's pretty wrenching to watch in the first place, as this is a couple who, for all their ups and downs, have been Happily Married for years. Seeing them fight to the point where one of them outright walks out on the other is stunning. Then when you learn a year later that Dan actually died after his heart attack and you realize that the fight symbolized Roseanne's internal anguish and anger at herself and him, it gets even worse. In short, if you had a... rough childhood, so to speak, the end of "Fights and Stuff" can be downright hard to watch.
• Dan and Roseanne reconciling towards the end of Season 9 is even more poignant when you learn that he actually died after his heart attack. When she mentions that the premature birth of Darlene's baby is what forced her to snap out of mourning and remember that they reconciled right before this happened, you realize that this means that she had actually finally made peace with his death.
• In "Lies My Father Told Me", Dan learns the truth about his mother and her past, and he spends most of the episode in denial, refusing to believe his mother was anything but perfect and insisting his father was lying. When he finally realizes the truth, he breaks down in tears and says he can't handle it. Roseanne hugs him and says they'll handle it together.
  • Re-watching how much Dan hates his father in the first five seasons and knowing what the truth is really tugs at the heart.
  • Also, a pretty poignant scene in the episode has Darlene trying the make jokes about the situation to lighten everyone's spirits. Whereas D.J. calls her out on this behavior, Roseanne joins in, making a joke that causes both her and Darlene to laugh...only for the reveal of Dan overhearing everything. Then later when Rosie tries to get him to see his father's side and face the reality about his mother, he then says that she was a good mother, stating that "She didn't teach her kids to laugh at things that aren't funny". While he clearly loves his wife and believes that she has done a great job raising the children, this comment shook her nonetheless due to him subtly calling her a bad mother, even in his anger, for making light of his tragedy.
• In "Brain Dead Poets' Society," Darlene's poem is adjudged to be the best in her class at school, and she's asked to read it for guests at the school's Culture Night. Roseanne is genuinely interested, but Darlene continues her normal snarking and complaining. When she finally does read the poem, though, it reveals just how much being rejected and ignored by virtually everyone at school hurts her.
  To Whom it Concerns/ I just turned thirteen/ Too short to be quarterback, too plain to be queen...
• In an early Mother's Day episode, Darlene and Becky treat Roseanne to a spa day at the local beauty salon in an attempt to butter her up so she'll allow them to spend the weekend at a rock concert. When Roseanne finds out the real reason why they were treating her so nicely, she's absolutely devastated. Even worse, Becky and Darlene have no idea how badly they actually hurt Roseanne, even when Dan is dressing them down over what they did. Though this turns into a Moment of Awesome when he subjects them to the Cool and Unusual Punishment of a weekend at Bev's.
• In "Wait Till Your Father Gets Home," Roseanne and Jackie's father Al dies. Jackie is much more upset over it than Roseanne, who is haunted by the memories of their father's physical and emotional abuse. Jackie eventually accuses Roseanne of being selfish by not hearing Al's side of the story and driving him out of their lives, which hurts Roseanne greatly. Eventually, though, someone has to positively identify the body as Al's before the funeral, and Roseanne volunteers. She then takes out a letter she has written and reads it aloud; the letter is all about Roseanne's anger at her father for what he did and how badly he affected both herself and Jackie. She ends the letter by telling Al that she forgives him, as she needs to move on, and forgives herself for not telling him sooner. The scene alone is a tearjerker, but what truly makes it sad is when Roseanne, preparing to leave the room, turns back and looks at the casket:
  Roseanne: [whispering] Thank you for your humor. I love you. Goodbye.
• David's abusive mother. Dan asks Roseanne why she suddenly took him in after wanting him away from Darlene. Roseanne replies it was because she was reminded of her own abusive father.
  • What makes the scene work is that, all through the argument, Dan is adamant that David cannot live with them, until Roseanne mentions that it's just like the way she grew up. The wind goes out of Dan's sails, then he just sits down on the bed and asks "That bad, huh?"
• In "Homeward Bound", David takes Roseanne's advice to do something in his life and decides to leave the Connors' and live with his abusive mother in Michigan. It turns out he's lying to Roseanne and Dan, and is actually going to Chicago to live with Darlene. Roseanne is visibly hurt by this (considering the fact that she grew up with an abusive father; also, Becky and Darlene have both left the house to move on with their lives, and Roseanne pretty much saw David as a second son). Dan comes into the living room and Roseanne is upset about David's decision, and we get this line:
  Roseanne: But you know how his mom is, Dan, she's not gonna change. She's not gonna get any better.
  Dan: Then he knows he can come back.
  Roseanne: We just keep losing 'em! This one's not even ours...
• "Death and Stuff" has a door-to-door salesman dying inside the kitchen when Roseanne lets him in for a glass of water. The entire episode focuses on the family waiting for paramedics to take the guy's body away and, of course, the episode make jokes about there being a dead body in the kitchen, but Becky is legitimately bothered by what happens and has to be comforted by her parents. There's also the fact that they never knew who this man was, and Roseanne apologizes to him as they wheel his body away.
  • There is, however, a rather sad Heartwarming Moment in the mix. Roseanne didn't really have to let the guy in, but she did anyway, and if she hadn't, there's a chance he could've just dropped dead on the street completely alone. At least he got to experience a small token of kindness before he died.
• In "The Driver's Seat", DJ steals the car as part of a dare from a friend and doesn't report it to anyone when he wrecks it. He is found out when the police are brought in and Roseanne, already on the end of her rope from the stress of work, verbally bashes DJ before violently spanking him when he tries to dodge responsibility. When she pulls herself together, she is utterly mortified at what she did and Jackie even says "It was just like Dad!" Guilt-ridden that she lashed out like their father had throughout childhood, Roseanne can't bring herself to face everyone. Finally, she calls DJ down and gives him a tearful apology, admitting to him that his own grandpa hit her a lot when she was a child and that she was always bitter over his lack of remorse for it. Although hurt and shaken, DJ shows sympathy to his mother and Roseanne vows never to make that mistake again. Anyone who experienced such a thing can strongly relate to how frightening and painful it is to have a loved one yell and lash out when things get tense.
  DJ: Mom, I'm sorry you got hit.
  Roseanne: Yeah, well, I'm sorry you got hit.
• In "Guilt by Disassociation", Roseanne goes for her latest interview with high hopes that she'll land a job. Needless to say, she and the family are ecstatic when she gets it...until she admits that she doesn't know how to operate a computer. Having phoned them the earlier news, Roseanne comes home to find that Dan and the entire neighborhood have thrown her a huge party to congratulate her. Needless to say, her friends and family are absolutely devastated when she breaks the bad news to them one by one. Feeling like a failure, Roseanne lashes out at Dan for supporting her decision to quit Wellman's, and the two argue until Roseanne admits she's angry with herself and feels that she let her whole family down when they needed her most. By the time she breaks down, all of the party-goers who turned up to congratulate her have bailed out. With a little encouragement from Dan, Roseanne picks herself back up and carries on, but it's impossible not to want to give her a hug when you see someone so headstrong and determined as Roseanne brought down to a point where she feels like she's failed everybody around her.
• "Let Them Eat Junk" has Roseanne and Jackie getting into a fight over the former letting Andy eat junk food despite the latter specifically saying not to. The real clincher comes from how Jackie makes a statement over how she doesn't want Andy to be like Roseanne's kids.
  • Throughout the series, Jackie has been a Cool Aunt to her nieces and nephew, but this argument has her say some vicious things about them.
    Jackie: Maybe I don't want my kid turning out the way yours did. Like your... smart-assed high school dropout, trailer-trash, dark-clothes-wearing, boyfriend's-in-the-basement, too-soon-sex doing, four-letter wording, hoodlum Oreo eaters!
  • The saddest part? Jackie is right. There's no doubt she loves her nieces and nephew, but they have done a lot of questionable and irresponsible things in their life because of how Roseanne raised and disciplined them.
  • Later in the episode, Bev, noticing Roseanne feeling depressed after her fight, comes in with a big bowl of ice cream to cheer her up. When Roseanne starts happily eating, Bev mentions that she's been using sweets to calm her down since she was a little girl. Roseanne, remembering Jackie's reason for not wanting to give Andy junk food (basically, that using food to accommodate feelings instead of trying to sort them out is a bad idea), asks her mother if she ever bothered to talk with her about feeling sad instead of bribing her. Not only is it a "not so different" moment for Roseanne, but it's also a moment where Bev seems guilty over her own parenting, trying to justify it ("You know how it is with kids") while she's clearly upset.
  • Right before this happens, Bev overhears the argument, immediately sides with Roseanne whilst not even bothering to hear or comprehend Jackie's viewpoint, and rather rudely throws her out of the house. For all the times that both women's straight-up abuse of her is Played for Laughs (for some reason), this is one of the few times it isn't and makes you want to give her a big hug. In addition, not only was Jackie apologizing to her for blowing up when their mother stuck her nose in their business, hearing Roseanne joyfully brag about how "weird" and unlike the two of them she is is also rather knife-twisting.
• At the end of part two of "Terms of Estrangement," after Becky gets married. Becky and Roseanne have spent most of two episodes engaged in Snark-to-Snark Combat, and Dan is giving Becky the silent treatment and barely speaking to Roseanne. Becky gives Roseanne a final hug and says in a tiny, almost-breaking voice "Say bye to Dad for me, okay?"
• In one episode, David makes some insensitive comments about DJ looking up to Mark as a good influence. Dan becomes genuinely upset and chews David out for his high-and-mighty attitude, pointing out that David isn't exactly a great role model either; he has a menial part-time job and spends most of his time judging other people. David is surprised at Dan's sensitivity towards the subject, and Dan tells him to think about it for a second: Why might he be upset at David looking down on someone who's not traditionally intelligent, doesn't have a college degree, made some mistakes in his life, and has to do manual labor to provide for his family? It's one of the few times we see Dan's vulnerability on display, and it hurts.
• "Her Boyfriend's Back". While Roseanne and Dan are gone, Becky and Mark take a ride on Dan's bike and Mark actually fixes some problem with the bike. When Roseanne and Dan are about to go bike riding, Dan notices the change and confronts Becky about it in one of the rare times that he is angry. He then gives his daughter a "Reason You Suck" Speech for how much of a pain she was being over getting a new car and how he was in her corner, but after this stunt, he won't be anymore. And when Becky tries to apologize, Dan coldly tells her to go away. The interactions between the two for most of the episode are Dan giving Becky the cold shoulder and her visibly trying to get him to talk to her again. Needlessly to say, this is hard to watch.
  • It gets even worse when Dan offers to make him and Darlene milkshakes and Becky, who is in the room with them, just stands there, hoping that her father will ask if she wants one, but he doesn't. This becomes too much for Becky as she looks like she's about to cry and runs upstairs to her room. Luckily, Dan realizes that he went too far and goes to apologize.
• In "This Old House," someone buys Roseanne and Jackie's childhood home and plans to demolish it, so they sneak in one night to take a trip down memory lane. At first they're having a good time as they tour the living room and reminisce about where all the old furniture and decorations used to sit—but then Roseanne's face changes as she looks over to another spot on the wall. She asks Jackie if she remembers what hung there; Jackie tries to dismiss it at first, but Roseanne keeps pushing until she finally says it: "The belt. Dad's belt." The two then speak frankly about just how badly their father abused them—not just physically, but emotionally, as he left the belt hanging on the wall to keep the girls frightened and even made them bring it to him when he was going to punish them. This was the first episode that revealed the level of abuse in Roseanne and Jackie's childhood, and it pulls no punches about how the pain still haunts them both.
  • The scene gets worse when you watch later episodes like "Wait Till Your Father Gets Home" (described above) and realize that Jackie and Roseanne are heavily divided on the issue. Jackie tries to make excuses for their father—"It was thirty years ago, Roseanne. Parents spanked their kids back then"—and points out that Bev wasn't any help either, as she never said anything. It's a huge wedge between the sisters, and unfortunately they never seem to truly make peace about it.
• In Season Nine's "Home for the Holidays," Dan comes back from visiting his mother in California to celebrate Christmas with the family. They're all ecstatic because they've won the lottery and can indulge in an extravagant holiday with all kinds of gifts. In the last scene, though, Dan is alone in the house on the phone with someone. Jackie enters the kitchen without saying anything and overhears his conversation...which turns out to be not with his mother, but his mistress. The episode ends with Jackie hiding in the kitchen and slowly realizing what's happening as she whispers "Oh my God" to herself.
  • What makes it worse is that in the scene right before this one, Roseanne gives Dan the ultimate Christmas present: the house's mortgage and a lighter. Dan breaks down sobbing Tears of Joy as he looks at it—the symbol of both their buying their home together and the debt they've struggled with for decades—and is so overcome that all he can do is embrace Roseanne after he burns the paper. Knowing that he's cheating on her makes the scene far worse upon rewatching the episode.

The revival

• Glenn Quinn, who played Mark, died of a drug overdose in 2002. To further hammer the point home, the revival season confirms The Character Died with Him, leaving Becky to fend for herself. It gets even sadder in the episode "Eggs Over, Not Easy", where Becky is told her chances of naturally conceiving a child at her age is incredibly small, and she's forced to contend with the fact that the years have caught up with her and she hasn't really moved on.
  Becky: [to Darlene] My life wasn't supposed to turn out like this. Mark and I were going to have kids. [...] I just never met anyone after [he died] who I wanted to have them with.
• "Darlene v. David" reveals exactly why David and Darlene broke up. They just weren't a good couple together, despite their being madly in love with one another. Darlene was upset that David was not a good father to their children.
  • The fact that Dan has now nothing but contempt for the man who was essentially his second son.
  • It's worse when you remember what Roseanne told David that she's the only one he has left that will defend him. Come the reboot, David has no one left and is on his own.
  • When Dan throws David out of the house, David and Darlene briefly talk outside, and he asks her, "What's Mark like?" It's such a heartbreaking moment because David may have been around for half of his daughter's life, but he's a stranger to his son.
• In "Go Cubs," when Roseanne and Jackie go to talk to Roseanne's Muslim neighbors, they see that their son is wearing a bulletproof vest. The parents explain that some people said some awful things to them the other day and it scared their son so much that he started having nightmares and wearing the vest was the only thing that made him feel safe.
  • In the same episode, Roseanne meets up with the mother while in line at the supermarket and they meet a cashier who does nothing but throw insults to the woman just because she's Muslim. First, the woman tries to pay using her EBT card, but the cashier says that there's not enough money on it before rudely saying, "Maybe the American taxpayers forgot to fill it up last week." Then, after Roseanne offers to help pay for the woman's groceries, the cashier says another rude remark ("Maybe you can help her carry the groceries out to her camel, too"). The woman can only stand there with a look of shock and sadness on her face.
    • It does turn into an awesome/heartwarming moment as, after the woman leaves, Roseanne gives the rude cashier a piece of her mind, saying that she is ignorant and threatening to tell her manager about what she did.
• The Revival's sudden cancellation on May 29, 2018 is this for anyone who's been a loyal fan of the series. With the huge public and online backlash that followed in the wake of some rather unflattering comments made by Barr herself on Twitter and ABC's decision to pull the series in response to the outcry, it seems the show's tenth season is almost certain to be its last.
  • Especially since, to many, it seems like the rest of the cast and crew is being punished for Barr's sins, so much so that some people (particularly Jimmy Kimmel) suggest they just kill off Roseanne's character and retool the show around Dan or Darlene.
  • Now that it appears ABC might do just that, things might get better.
• Roseanne being killed off prior to The Conners Spin-Off.

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