"Dear John Freeman, How are you? I Miss you at home come home safe and soon with Gordon Freeman for thanksgiving diner. Love mom."A lot of fanfiction falls under this regard. It's bad. In mild cases it's because of the quality of presentation, with terrible spelling, punctuation and spacing making an otherwise quality story almost unreadable. Some have what is basically an Excuse Plot that showcases a certain character or is a reason to go from one sex scene to the next. But good or bad, there's still something about it that compels you to read on. Something horrible. Something funny. Something nauseating. Or somebody just dared you. If you turned this story into a movie, it would be embraced by Grindhouse theaters everywhere. It would be the B-Movie in a Double Feature. And it would still attract crowds. Sturgeon's Law has its part to play, as do Stealth Parody and Troll Fic.
— Half-Life: Full Life Consequences 2: What has tobe done
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- "Analyiah's Jakota/7 Tru Luv Page" (sic). See it in all its not-brain-safe glory here. This website is an overly stealthy Stealth Parody of fangirls in general and bad fanfic writers in particular, whose unknown creator went all-out to make it as awful as possible. It's mostly Star Trek: Voyager based, of course, with an emphasis on pairing Chakotay ("Jakota") with Seven of 9 ("7," or in one memorable instance "8"). There are other stories inserting the eponymous Mary Sue (presumably Analyiah) into other works including "Perl Harbor" (insert computer joke here) and "American Pi" ((un)fortunately not a crossover of American Pie and π), as well as the revelation that she's a "jedeye". Spelling mistakes and ALLCAPS abound, and there are eye-watering illustrations drawn in MS Paint (some featuring the creator's purported Real Life boyfriend).
- The enigma known as Andrew Troy Keller, who specializes in writing the most Narm-filled "erotic" fanfictions ever put to a page. Or, as he himself puts it, "pure, untamed erotica"... which could not be a less fitting appellation. His stories are filled with a combination of robotic, often copy-pasted dialogue, improbable situations, OOC behaviour, long-winded narration full of run-on sentences which sounds, at times, like the demented ramblings of a Talkative Loon, and most infamously, very, very awkward sex talk. The most shining example? "Oooorrrrgggghhhh!" — as said by the Progressive advert lady, in an erotic fanfic written by him — truly, nothing is sacred to this guy.
- Angelcuti is a god/crossover/resurrection obsessed author who has written several stories for Pikmin, 9, and whatever else she likes at the time, with her self insert Princess Angela forming loads of relationships and pulling random powers out of her ass. However, you can't help but smile at the unintentional hilarity that ensues very often. Her stories have examples of Eleventh Hour Superpower, Fridge Logic, and many more. She was banned from Deviant ART, where her fanfics were published. However, her works can still be viewed by DA searching her name.
- The stories created by ballistic dolphin, including Sherlock Season 4, Hnuger Games Hungry For Victry, and Turnbout Spiderman. They are all characterized by cheesy, over-the-top dialogue (like “'AAH MORIARY HAS RTURNED' Watson squeeled.”, frequent misspellings/grammatical errors, and ridiculous plots. His characters will often narrate their own lives (“'I have solfed the mysetry' said Sherlock”) and he always adds an obligatory fight scene at the end of every story.
- Anything by barrylawn, especially turnabout goat, krazy kurain adventures and professor layton and the secret agent conspiracy. All of his fics are written in the same style: Poor grammar/spelling, crazy plots, everyone is excessively OOC, foul language, etc. Aside from the highlighted fics, he has a massive collection of troll fics to read. Most of his fics are about Ace Attorney, but he has written for several other franchises, such as Professor Layton and WarioWare.
- Anything made by ComicsNix, such as The Wolf Blood Lineage, Bella Swan Pregnant And Furious and Doomsday Womb featuring Superman, Batman, and Inspector Gadget. Also notable is Love Beyond Circuits; Love Beyond Flesh, featuring Optimus Prime, Princess Leia and R2-D2, especially since it gives us such immortal lines as:
Optimus: Leia, your leather clad bikini lighten up my boron buttocks!"
- Judging by his Facebook page, ComicsNix is quite intelligent — and a troll. A brilliant, brilliant troll.
- He also wrote Severus Snape: Professor and Lover, which was removed from Fanfiction Dot Net for its excessive and grotesque sex scenes between the eponymous Potions master and the Teletubbies. Yes, the Teletubbies.
- If you actually want to find excerpts of it, you sick bastard, it was featured on a Cracked list concerning absurd and horrifying slashfics.
- Cori Falls, particularly her Pokémon series in its later stages. The characters have gone from merely OOC to blatant author mouthpieces, the plots are filled with cheap wangst and melodrama and contrivances and the attitude behind them is irritatingly smug "I know the characters better than the powers that be". But they're the most delightful train wreck sprinkled with a few genuinely amusing moments.
- Dakari-King Mykan
- My Little Unicorn is a My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Hate Fic that's also an attempt at a Fix Fic, where half the characters are Mary Sues and the other half are either Stupid Evil villains or characters from the show that have been flanderized into oblivion, either for a cheap Take That! or because the author is just that misinformed (apparently he hates FiM so much it "hurts" him, whatever that means). The author's main goal is to try and show that the Power of Friendship is useless, and the power of belief is stronger. Yet the characters become friends anyway, and the power of belief seems to mean "Just grab the Deus ex Machina generator and shout that you believe". And for a fic that is supposed to teach you that the Power of Friendship is powerless, you would think that he would at least take inspiration from a source other than Power Rangers. You know, that one show based on teamwork. The author can't really take criticism either. All of the secondary characters are thinly veiled Expies taken from shows the author likes, and the main characters are all either some kind of Self Insert (even the Big Bad) or a Flat Character with an annoying gimmick (like speaking in Painful Rhyme and being an artist. Take that away and they're literally the same). And that's just the beginning. All in all, this is Poe's Law at its finest, and most of the fun comes from watching just how deluded the author can get.
- The author's previous magnum opus, the Teen Titans Wangstfest known as The End of Ends isn't far behind in terms of laughable badness. In a nutshell, Beast Boy turns evil and adopts the identity of Count Logan and gleefully commits murder and genocide... all because Terra broke up with him in canon. Any attmept to evoke sympathy from him falls flat and BB instead comes off as an over-the-top whiny emo and Count Logan is so hilariously pointlessly evil that reading his lines in Beast Boy's canon voice ruins any attempt to make him look a serious threat. Oh, and did we mention that the entire story exists in fact because the author was so devastated by Beast Boy and Terra not hooking up in the finale that he has nightmares about it to this very day?
- The fanfiction of darkvampangle101, whose misspelled, Mary-Sue-filled ultra-Christian romances include the self-explanatory Star Trek: Nazi's in Space, Frozen: Love Concurs All! - a story about Queen Elsa teaming up with a love interest who can magically create robotic Starbucks baristas, and THE NEW GIRL on Voyager - about an American evangelical teen who appears on the starship Voyager, where "all of the boys on the ship falls in love" with her.
- Much of the fanfiction oeuvre of David Gonterman is just random to the point of almost seeming like a stream of consciousness. Here's a man who comes up with ideas like changing Pocahontas into a dominatrix, threatening Disney with Unwilling Roboticisation as part of a copyright disclaimer, and MSTing the manifesto of an anti-furry group with Stephanie McMahon as one of the co-hosts. It's all atrociously written, but there's a certain charm to just how completely odd it gets at times.
- The oeuvre of "Doctor Thinker" and his good-natured struggles with the English language ("Out pooped Sailor Mercury") deserve mention. Still, be fair to the guy. He does admit that he's not a great speller, and he's happy to have his work MSTed. He's a good sport — a TERRIBLE writer, but a good sport. He's even a member here (Dr Thinker), and unlike some of the other authors of bad fanfiction, seems like a genuinely nice guy.
- Dr. Thinker might be even more incoherent in audiobook form.
- Dr.Splattenburgers seems to have a talent for poor grammar, utterly random and nonsensical story lines, and mercilessly butchering the original personalities of the characters in his stories. In his crossover story called "Gears of Potter", Marcus and Dominic from Gears of War team up with Harry Potter to fight an Alien Invasion, giant locust ghosts, and Voldemort's evil Crackmaster zombie demon swordfish lobster monster. The sheer amount of randomness and the nonsensical "character development" can lead to many laugh out loud moments, though it may also do bad things to your brain if you try to read too much of it.
- Also, it appears that the author doesn't know much about the Harry Potter universe besides the bare basics. Here are just some of the things that are different in the story compared to the actual Harry Potter universe.
- In the Harry Potter universe, wizards are strictly forbidden from using dangerous spells in the purpose of harming others and breaking this rule is considered a very serious crime. In the fic however, Harry Potter can just casually use his magic to summon demons that drag people to hell.
- In the books/movies, Voldemort use to be a Hogwarts student like Potter who then later turned to evil. In the fic he used to be a caveman who sold his soul to Satan so he could go fight a dinosaur.
- In the movies Harry has a fairly typical teenage male voice, while in the fic his voice is described as being very high pitched.
- The idea of a Gears of War/Harry Potter crossover became Hilarious in Hindsight when EA Games released the video game adaptation of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, which pretty much played exactly like Gears of War, cover system and all, with magic spells replacing guns.
- In addition to making the now finished Gears of Potter, the author also wrote a short Avatar fanfic titled "Avatar: Redemption in space" which takes place after the events of the film where Jake Sully, the protagonist of the film and now a married Na'vi has to save Pandora from nuclear Armageddon, using his huge knife that can cut through spaceships, his Na'vi mind powers, and the power of Manly Tears to defeat the evil "humens" who are trying to destroy Pandora.
- Also, it appears that the author doesn't know much about the Harry Potter universe besides the bare basics. Here are just some of the things that are different in the story compared to the actual Harry Potter universe.
- Meet dyllyny bryccyli He/She/It? is "an African American move to Freedom United States. Love tell story and play video game."
- Eogrus is his name and writing ComicsNix-esque fanfics is his game. It should be noted that the man is Portuguese, but you probably wouldn't know it, judging from the pretentious language he uses. His fanfics also contain some pretty disgusting material, but what saves him from being So Bad, It's Horrible is the possibility that maybe, just maybe, he might be a troll. (Well, that, and the fact that his fanfics are surprisingly well-written, as far as grammar goes, as well as the fact that he has written more reasonable fics.)
- Anything by Elizabeth8289. She has over 41 stories about Lazy Town, Sponge Bob Squarepants, Arthur and Baby Sitters Club. Be warned, though. A lot of her fanfics do no research on such places such as Iowa, New York or illnesses. She also tends to add the same moaning dreams, characters crying and same plot devices in her stories (she's especially fond of characters coming down with the stomach flu, for one). Most explode into a ton of chapters where the character or characters are at the plot at the end, and include classic lines such as "I pushed four times until the baby came out" (From her "Dawn's Dream World" story).
- The "CSI: Miami" fanfiction of Forensic Kitteh features a number of bizarre but good shit.
- The Gemini Twins12: Their fics are nothing but Gorn, OOC, and Depraved Homosexuals with creepy fur fetishy (as in turning characters in animals or giving them wings Deus ex Machina style) stuff stacked on top. The many Original Characters are hilariously weird and culturally/racially/historically insensitive, but something about the grimdark, Big Lipped Alligator Moments, and Mary Sues just draws you in. It helps that the fics are mostly grammatically corect.
- Although Hetalia is based on Homoerotic Subtext , these fics go out of their way to Hide Your Gays through liberal use of Ron the Death Eater, Critical Research Failures, and Ass Pull to get away from teh gainess!!1, going as far as to pair mentally ill characters and possibly underage characters with no way of consenting up.
- Anything by Hans Von Hozel, who is currently on a mission to defile every single major fandom with ridiculous but elegant bite-size interpretations. Especially notable are his Pokémon, Twilight, and Titanic renditions.
- I.Braginsky, an author of very short Axis Powers Hetalia Troll Fics.
- Anything by Issei Mataloun of Hellstorm Evangelion fame. Imagine Neon Genesis Evangelion as seen through the twisted lens of a sex-starved twelve-year-old who doesn't know much about the series. Throw in a God-Mode Sue, an Idiot Plot where the Devil becomes our obligatory Big Bad, a few heavy dollops of Ho Yay, buckets full of Gorn, and inane fight scenes where everyone acts like a Large Ham and poses up a storm. But no simple description could capture the pure Crazy Awesome of this series. You're just going to have to read it.
- The works of Jack Russel:
- Jakkid166 is a somewhat frequent author of bad Phoenix Wright fanfictions. They're all written in a style that involves a lack of capitalization, poor spelling, and bizarre plots, and they are all set in an alternate universe to the official. His fics also tend to have several supernatural elements, such as portals and ghosts, that would otherwise never appear in the canon Ace Attorney universe.
- Jedi Qui-Gon is an author who exclusively operates in mega-crossovers. Almost all of them share the exact same traits: bizarre plots with plot developments that make absolutely no sense, tons and tons of In-Name-Only, a boatload of original characters who more often than not end up being useless and unnecessary to the plot of whichever story they're in, gobs and gobs of extremely hammy dialogue, and the fact that most of them have monsters called "Imperium", which the author has yet to tell what they are (though further investigation seems to suggest that they are the Imperium from Justice League). Perhaps his most awesomely bad fanfic is Protecting the Jedi, a retelling of basically the entire original trilogy of Star Wars that also manages to cross over Mass Effect, Naruto, and Halo.
- Anything by Justin Lawson, particularly this gem, Toons Vs. Abyss, a plotless Tiny Toon Adventures/Animaniacs/Pinky and the Brain/Freakazoid!/Histeria! crossover that stars Justin Lawson as a blatantly obvious Gary Stu, as well as Abyss from Marvel vs. Capcom 2: New Age of Heroes as the villain. Apparently the story involves jelly... and coupons? Oh, and there's a crystal.
- EVERYTHING by Kasper A. Vestergaard. Particularly this.
- Some of the works by Lord Ryu TJ. Typical fan fiction plots (with a lot of copy-paste from series — as in, even if all the Total Drama Island challenges were used, the same challenge may be used later. Even in the same fic) such as episode re-writes and TDI crossovers turned completely WTF-ishnote . This chapter in particular basically sums up nearly everything (as it begins with a suggestive Heather/Duncan moment, then throws in Heather/Courtneynote ). In the middle of all the copy-paste, there are still other good parts:
- SpongeBob (here) and Phineas (Seen mostly here), of all people, are jerks and the closest people to antagonists in the Total Cartoon series.
- Several Crack Pairings. There has been Peter / Bridgette rape in one chapter of the long, dead Total Cartoon series (and with Courtney. and with Heather too. He's almost as bad as Duncan), along with some serious amount of Phineas/Candace incest throughout his works.
- "Heather then stretched her cheeks apart and stuffed Lindsay's vagina in the anus, and let Lindsay's cum shoot into Heather."
- Captain K'nuckles and Flapjack getting raped by. (here)
- And now there is a sequel. Of all the things to write one for...
- Duncan (and to a lesser extent, Peter Griffin) is made into a blatant Karma Houdini Marty Stu. Various fics (mostly Total Cartoon series) practically give him a harem of Courtney, Heather, Bridgette, Izzy, and Lindsay (surprisingly, not Gwen — yet). Up to four of them in the same fanfic (as of now), despite how Courtney is stated many times to be his actual girlfriend, and he sexually assalts some of them (like Bridgette here) and nobody minds (not even Courtney)note . This gets worse in a more horrible work where Chris assigns him to rape three of the girls mentioned — Lindsay, Heather, and Bridgette — and would have been Courtney, but he makes out with her insted.
- Many Lovers52 (also known as "T3h CrAiZyZ x5" by the author) is a group of five different females that actually hold personalities similar to one another. Her first fic has been considered the best done by the group, but beyond that, they're all pretty much short and almost into the point of insanity. Here's a dramatic reading of one of the author's stories.
- The mighty works of MG-Dinobot, whose poor excuses for Beast Wars fanfics are full of more atrocious spelling, strange non sequiturs, and non-existent grammar than you can shake a "rotate blade" at. For example:
"You lived like a warrior ans died to an hero!"
- In the same vein: Ravage 3 Bodies Evolution.
- Everything by mynameisanonymous. She writes absolutely awful Pokémon fanfiction and believes it to be not only well-written, but romantic. She has decent grammar and spelling, but the content is hilariously terrible. It is notable that not one of them is a Troll Fic.
- Naglfar' fanfics, which happen to be absurd and over-the-top in a way that just drips of humor. The Rouge Angles of Satin only adds to the absurd comedic potential. He even takes requests, such as this. He wrote fics centering around a random Gonk from Fire Emblem who runs around as a Memetic Molester "sex god", invokes Black Comedy Rape regularly, has a penis that can stab people to death, opens dimensional portals, and glow gold. It was his fanfics that caused the Gheb Memetic Mutation to start, and that made him become an Ensemble Darkhorse in FE forums everywhere. His stories contain horrible spelling and grammar, Rouge Angles of Satin, pervasive research failure, and Canon Defilement. This Final Fantasy VII fanfic is one of his more hilariously bad efforts. And yes, he is a troll.
- Naruto's Brat. This guy writes smut fics in the Naruto fandom. His works provide examples of Dan Browned (he gives advice on writing sex scenes, despite being complete clueless in the subject), Anatomically Impossible Sex, Artistic License – Biology, Canon Defilement, and Ron the Death Eater, among others. He loves turning Naruto into a Canon Sue. The rants in his userpage are also worth a look, they provide examples of Small Name, Big Ego and Viewers Are Morons. This is one of his most hilariously bad stories.
- niceperson, whose works include a Zelda story in which Link faces Cybermen; Merlin: Revenge of Oother, where Uther Pendragon is presented as a hero fighting against an evil world of "magick" using The Bible as justification; and a Skins fic with exaggerated Northern accents, an aesop against "drugging," and a fight with a werewolf. Most of his more recent stuff involves the ridiculously named Spadang Skaran, a Villain Sue of epic proportions, who pops up in almost every universe for no apparent reason, and is the definition of Card-Carrying Villain:
- "BRING ME MY FOOD" he sohuted to a man next to him and the man did. A tray came in with dead baibes on it.
- niceperson eventually wrote a sequel to Revenge of Oother, in which "Oother" is revived in the present day and becomes an ass-kicking, gun-wielding Samuel L. Jackson expy who calls everyone "Motherfucker". Yes, that same Uther played by Anthony Head. He also hates his critics to the extent he writes a chapter as a Take That! where they're portrayed as "evil fashist robots", who oppress the people by forcing them to spell things correctly.
- For those who know Spanish, there are always the unforgettable pearls of Perla Shumajer (by the way, that's her true made up name created by her imagination). Here you can find one of her stories (googling a bit you can get more). An article of her in the satirical wiki Frikipedia is also available here. Everything is in Spanish, of course. She's probably one of the most well-known bad writers in that language.
- Someone decided to translate some of her stories into English language. It's not as good as reading them in its original language, but then you can expĺore the wonderful joy of the legendary gem "A boy that falls in love with his professor of potions and his professor of potions falls in love with him, they like, love and adore each other so much, they become a couple and marry /into marriage/ and they are husbands."
- THE PETE PETERSON EXPERIENCE, aka The Baconator (Link). If you can get past his profile, which consists of the lyrics to a Kid Rock song and Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Sweet Home Alabama," a bunch of incoherent ramblings, several other song lyrics, a list of screenname changes, several links thrown in (including links to shock sites), and use of the obnoxious one-letter-per-line format, you can then browse his "fics," which make no sense and have every other word misspelled. They consist mostly of-
- Nonsensical Sly Cooper crackfics relying mostly on Vulgar Humor, including Cluster F Bombs and groin attacks.
- Death fics simply titled (character name) Dies A Horrible/Violent/Painful Death, which are the EXACT same story written line for line, only with different character names and small details pasted in. In these stories, various characters are brutally dismembered by a serial killer named Evil Andy Inspector. In the introductions, he claims that he "loves" these characters and has dolls of them that he sleeps with every night. The words he uses to describe their "accents" are also quite interesting. (What exactly does a "gay accent" sound like? What's a "dr accent"? How about a "Big-Head accent"? A "retard accent"?) A "cat accent"?)
- Peter Chimaera in general. Doom: Repercussions of Evil in particular.
- Regrettably, the story has been removed from FanFiction.Net for whatever reason (most likely quality issues finally getting through to the right/wrong person). It can still be found elsewhere, though. It doesn't exactly need much storage to host.
- Batman: Nemesis Fight  was also adapted into the best "episode" of Batman: The Animated Series ever.
- He also wrote Quarter-Life: Halfway To Destruction, apparently at the bidding of Uncyclopedia. It is best summed up by the following excerpt:
"UI have discovered new radoactive isatope but it is so vollatile that it does not have a half-life but quarter-life so we must observe with hasty"
- One can usually expect online role-playing in general to be bad. In between crappy characters, God Modding, and a lack of fluency in actions, it's just expected. However, one author in the City of Heroes Virtue server community manages to showcase all worst excesses and biggest mistakes of the fandom. He goes by the name of Raienst, with some of the most potently awful writing ever, it warps the space time continuum and becomes utterly hilarious. His earlier characters such as Logan Storm and ShadowWings have to be seen to be believed. They're basically God Mode Sues without any regard whatsoever for continuity, plausibility, or regard for either the English language or Wiki markup. He has (unfortunately) gotten better over time (without losing the God-Mode Sue leanings...), but you can feel your intelligence draining as you read on.
- Most of his characters: "Nice guy, good with women, angry, no parents, uberly powerful."
- Anything by Ranay. Her ridiculously dramatic writing, awful spelling... It's enough to reduce anyone to tears of laughter. She de-activated her deviantART Account, but her works can still be found by doing a Google Search or deviantART Search of her. Alternatively, this has archived a few of her works.
- ShakespeareHemmingway, the greatest author of our generation. He claims that his screename is to honor his two favorite authors so that he can write like them. And he writes Garfield crossovers which must be seen to be believed. Garfield is quite literally retooled into Testosterone Poisoning incarnate as an immortal action hero with manliness of epic proportions who travels the world fighting evil with his friend and comrade, Jon Arbuckle (AMAKOOOOOO). In addition to the incoherent, sometimes blatant rip-off plots, all of the fics are permeated by this incredibly bizarre atmosphere in which civil rights and equality for men are causes worth dying for, but women are treated like dirt and exist only for Garfield to have Ikea Erotica with, as well as Beige Prose with grammar and sentence structure so bizarre, you'd think Borat wrote it. All of it culminates in a most hilarious display further helped by the fact that apparently the author takes all of this seriously.
- Garfield Effect: Galaxy Adventure is his first foray into multi-chapter sequential stories, and when it's not giving us such gems as Garfield crossing the galaxy at highway speed, it's following the plot of Mass Effect pretty faithfully.
- Zero Dark Garfield, a crossover with Zero Dark Thirty, sends Garfield after Osama Bin Laden. Yeah, let the fact that someone sent a bright, orange, lazy housecat after the man who ordered 3,000 Americans dead sink in for a minute.
- There are two fics that involve Garfield rescuing Natalie Portman from some kind of peril and then making love.
- The Garfield Bowl is an entire fic of Kanye West getting so pissed off about Garfield performing the Super Bowl halftime instead of him, that he infects several female music stars with Ebola. And in this story, the Ebola virus functions akin to the Umbrella Virus. Garfield rescues them from Kanye's lair and heals them by fucking them.
- The King's Garfield is a crossover with The King's Speech that has Garfield out several Nazi spies and bone Queen Helena Bonham Carter.
- Garfield: Royal Rescue is a story about Garfield rescuing Kate Middleton from Prince William! It is quite possibly his greatest masterpiece yet.
- The Mass Effect stories of Siha Krios have a certain Narm Charm to them, despite large amounts of Out of Character Moments and research failure.
- The entire canon of Squirrelking. Memetic Mutation generator 4chan even made Fight Of Metal Gears into a comic because of its absolute awfulness.
- Half-Life: Full Life Consequences has been adapted into many different animations. There are dozens more where that came from.
- Prepare to be baffled — this guy is ridiculous. Every character is always referred to by their full name and only their full name. Gordon Freeman never calls his own brother "John" or vice-versa. John is an office worker who wears a lab coat. He has two motorcycles; one is explicitly "more faster" (why didn't he take it in the first place?), and the other he keeps on the roof. He does unnecessary and improbable backflips off the equally unnecessary and improbable ramp on the roof of his building. And he looks on the Internet for "the next boss's weakness", as if he was playing the game himself. He has a laser gun and a "rocket gun". None of this is ever explained.
- Then there's Hero Beggining, a new chapter released on 16 February 2009, set some time after Full Life Consequences (which has yet to conclude) that extends Gordon Freeman's family further and seems to establish that Combines are Metro-cops that come from "science and outter space". Good lord.
- Hero Beggining was soon followed by a new chapter called Halflife Fulllife Consequences: Free Man. It starts with John Freeman backflipping out of the sky.
- One troper took his two Halo: Halos in Space fics and remade them as one fic. See here.
- Every one of his works use family members of video game characters instead of the actual characters. There's John Freeman, Gorden Freeman's brother; Jake Snake, Solid Snake's son; Rain Strife, cloud strife's brother; and finally, Joe Chief, an army guy, but he wasn't a robot liek master cheif, so he didn't fly. note
- And now, eight years after his final story, he has returned.
- StaraptorEmpoleon, whose Pokémon fanfics include such delights as utterly nonsensical (or nonexistent) plots, copious instances of Department of Redundancy Department, casting Cyrus as an alcoholic neo-Nazi; having Saturn, Mars, and Jupiter come from England, France, and Canada, respectively; and having all the Gym Leaders and Elite Four members secretly be each other's cousins. There's also a fic in which Cynthia has sex with Lucian when he turns into a Gabite and ends up giving birth to a Gible Pokémorph baby... Oh, and her fics contain so much factual inaccuracy that she could very well be the Dan Brown of Pokémon fanfiction!
- Starjeffry. Be sure to read Paint The Town, in which the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter characters are strippers. They have Anatomically Impossible Sex, and there is a list of stripper costumes. Make sure to read to the end. Or, read The Time Machine, which was made into a YouTube video once (the video no longer exists.) He also wrote a Napoleon Dynamite incest fic.
- The Star Trek fanfiction of Stephen Ratliff features the ultimate Mary Sue, 12-year old Ensign Marissa Picard. Ratliff's work is a popular subject for MSTing.
- Anything by Storyprovider. Period.
- The entire library of the strange, short-lived author known as Sumi tani. In addition to having grammar and spelling so unbelievably horrible that even Hans von Hozel would be jealous, her (?) stories generally just... do not make sense. Highlights include a Back to the Future fanfic in which "future" is misspelt as "futute" (a feminine Romanian word meaning "to have fucked"), a whole DeLorean fits in someone's locker, and Biff goes back in time to 1955 to become Prime Minister of America, as well as a Batman fic in which the Joker's ultimate weakness turns out to be diabetes.
- Sue Mary a "haf-goast haf-vampire haf-gurl" seems to have no grasp of the English language OR the things she writes about. She wrote The Huemn Ceniped 2 The Humen Milipede, Sherlock Homes Vs Jack The Ripper, and Teh Screaming Of The Lambs.
- Anything by Tails Luv-er. A seperate account for someone named Camobamo 1, EVERY FIC on his profile is Sonic the Hedgehog yaoi. Ships range from common ones like Sonadow (Sonic X Shadow), to ridiculous ones like Silvails (Silver X Tails). Even worse, one of his fics called To Love Yourself had Modern Sonic and Classic Sonic loving each other and having sex later is so ridiculous, that you can't help but like it.
- unlabeledcarl is an author who's mostly written Superjail! fanfics and oh me oh my, they are so god-awful they're hilarious. Where do I even begin? There's a fanfic with Lord Stingray giving birth to seal pups on an island that's not Superjail, another fanfic where Alice now has a vagina and uterus for some reason and can also lactate and proceeds to get her funk on with the previously-mentioned character, and lastly we have Warden literally making love with Jared's head.
- Check out this gem:
The Warden started to rub his crotch up and down against Jared's head, his pants started to slip off and dangle around his ankles. His penis started to get erected. It touched Jared's head. It was little, but it was still very powderful when it came to sex and sex things. He rubbed faster and then he gasping in ecstasy. Jared whined a little bit.
- Check out this gem:
- It's safe to say that Voltalia falls under this trope somewhat. While An Unexpected Child is good and she has gotten better since How You Remind Me (see below; now considered an Old Shame), that doesn't excuse her from writing some of the most ridiculous and batshit stories to exist, like Aerial Choreography (see below; now also considered an Old Shame). (These are her more reasonable fanfics, by the way.)
- The Woman In Red writes Mary Sue stories for the Matrix fandom. Her works provide examples of IKEA Erotica, Anatomically Impossible Sex, Artistic License – Biology, Canon Defilement... and bad writing in general. The ridiculousness of her works will give you a laugh.
- Worth Dice. He can be found on deviantART as well with his fanfictions. His fanfics range from poorly mangled grammar and Marty Stues. His Hamtaro fanfictions are located here. These are about his Squall Leonheart rip off of a hamster character. Be sure to read at your own risk, though. These fanfics get a lot of praise.
- His early works have gone under Creator Backlash recently, so he's trying to mold himself out of this.
- Yoshizilla Rhedosaurus writes strange fics about characters from various anime and game series, many of which go unfinished. These stories are possibly written badly on purpose, and are chock-full of YouTube Poop jokes (the author used to be a YouTube Pooper), Internet memes, and... random things that serve no purpose to what little plot there is. One of his fanfics, Belle's Farting Problem, SOMEHOW created a meme of Bianca farting on /vp/. These stories have to be read to be believed. Honestly.
- The 6ft dick writes parody fanfictions for children's shows like Arthur, Doug and The Magic School Bus that utilize generous amounts of Black Comedy and Rule 34. For many, there's just something about his fics' blatantly over-the-top satire and surprisingly competent grammar that mark them as the kind of thing that you know you shouldn't laugh at, but laugh at anyway.
- 42 Noodles writes incredibly silly Troll Fics with awful grammar and ridiculous plot twists. She also seems to be fond of celebrity cameos and redundant sentences.
- Anything by 111SAMUSRIDLEY4EVA2006-chan, who specializes in Metroid fanfic. Her (?) magnum opus, Metroid High School received memetic status after a dramatic reading by Nethertribes and some friends during a bunch of Let's Plays.
- Anything written by Xantrax-42, who specializes in re-writing canon "Pretty Cure" series (read: copying dialogue) and inserting one or both of his Copycat Gary Stu Self Inserts just to make them more "interesting" (copycat because they are, appearance-wise, blatant ripoffs of Django and Sabata from Boktai). His Precure Meet The Dream Traveler stories are all Script Fics, the English is horrible, and there is virtually no tension or emotion in the narration whatsoever except in the passages he plagiarized to write it. The only thing that is any good are the cheesy one-liners and nicknames his Gary Stus shout every now and then, and even those stop being funny after a short while.
- Detsniy Off Skiword is an up and coming example. His works include a Kid Icarus fanfic where a new angle named Cloud joins Pit, and partakes in over-the-top battles even by Kid Icarus standards, involving really unrealistic depictions of 'nuclears', Curbstomp Battles, and really odd dialogue. He also has a Professor Layton fanfic where Layton must investigate the apparent resurrection of the infamous serial killer, Jack The Raper. There is also an Advance Wars fanfic, where a new CO named Dusk joins Yellow Comet and defends them from 'Blu Moon' using his Geass-fueled CO Powers. Then he went on to perform an Ace Attorney fanfic, where some of the villains of the series escape prison, and causes a rather over-the-top chase, with plenty of Courtroom Antics, Take That, Critics!, and even a sudden satire of the EU Referendum. The style is quite similar to that of Light and Dark The Adventures of Dark Yagami and Code Geass: Awesome of the Rebellion, to the point that at times, it certainly feels like a tribute to them.
- The works of Andy Prosser. The plots are incomprehensible wrecks and almost always rely on bizarre Shocking Swerves that somehow manage to make even less sense than the rest of the story, but they're so goofy that you can't help but smile while reading them.
- PetitChouLoup, whose first story was an epic saga detailing the meeting of Gordon Freeman and John Stalvern.
- After Keep N Doom is an utterly bizarre crossover between Sonic the Hedgehog and Doom: Sonic, Knuckles, and Tails go to Plutonia in hopes of establishing friendships with the demons from Doom, but, predictably, get attacked, and join forces with the Doom Marine (whom they name Joe) to escape. The plot alone makes it worth a look, but what truly makes it awesome is the narrator practically yelling all of the lines, the electronic organ music soundtrack, and that the comic was apparently translated from Spanish to English by someone who speaks only Japanese, resulting in a bunch of insanely quotable lines:
Knuckles: Panda of having shitted!
- Avatars II: When Qwaritch Takes Revenge by hunterjeanmidna. Acting as a "sequel" to James Cameron's Avatar, the one-shot story involves
Colonal Miles QuaritchKernal Miles Qwaritch (or Qwarutch, or Qwarich, or whatever the author decides to call him) returning to Pandora after "the dude on the other end" calls him and yells that "THE Na'viNAVIS ARE KILLIN EVERYBODY!". The majority of the story involves him fighting Navis (or Nazis, due to spelling errors) and joining up with Master ChiefCheef (or Master Chef) and Samus AranArin and killing just about everything that moves. Particularly funny parts are the beginning, and the references to Samus as a male (guess the author never got the message). Complete and utter dreck, but it's damned funny dreck. It can be read here, if you dare.
- Hunterjeanmidna has already cranked out his next story, in which he intends to speak out "against rape an show that its NOT cool, and its NOT erotic in the least for people to write "sexy fics" about." Too bad he picked Alvin and the Chipmunks as the story to deliver such a message. Brace yourselves for Alvan An The Chipmunks 3 The Second Squeakuel, found here.
- The Battle for the Worlds: Between Worlds, Beyond is one of the more bizarre fanfics ever. It starts as a generic Mary Sue fic that's supposed to be Sailor Moon/Harry Potter but begins to toss in so many random people from Beyoncé to the kids from Full House that it's insane.
- Blood Raining Night is a crossover of Inuyasha, Axis Powers Hetalia, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Elfen Lied, Hellsing, Dragon Ball Z and the list goes on. It follows the adventures of local Mary Sue Rechieru Ketsukineko-oni and her battles against love triangles, Teen Pregnancy, an inner demon, and her evil father. Filled with Wangst, Author Appeal, strange Purple Prose, and Canon Defilement. One truly needs to experience it.
- Burston's Sorrow is about Goofy's son Burston and also Pokémon. MST'd by Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000. Also turned into an animated short.
- Christian Humber Reloaded was so bad that someone turned it into a webcomic.
- To give you the heads up, the fic is about a super Saiyan, Demon, Dragon, Wolf, Vampire, Horteka (it's from Bionicle) Cyborg who teams up with loads and loads of licensed characters. The main character becomes more powerful than God within the first part of the story.
- Don't forget about Crimson Blood! In this bizarre fanfic, Harry Potter and Frodo Baggins (who is inexplicably a Hogwarts student) start taking drugs, but then Draco and Sam (who are their boyfriends in this fic) find out and dump them. Afterwards, they try to quit taking drugs, but after one day of being sober they commit suicide.
- DAVE STDIDER POKEMON TRANER is a Homestuck and Pokémon crossover where more words are spelled wrong than right and Dave gets a "Groundoon" as a starter. The author either does not understand Homestuck, does not understand Pokémon, or both.
- However, this may have been intentional, considering how much effort Dave puts into his own work.
- Digipoké: Digital Pokémon, a Pokémon/Digimon crossover that tells the story of a group of people who find themselves in the Digipoké world, where they basically walk around while transforming into different Pokémon and Digimon and defeating powerful enemies just because they can.
- A crossover between Bleach and Dracula?!? The FOOLISH adventures of Ichigo and Dracula
- Fuck The Jesus Beam if you can make it past the metric ton of horrific imagery. Case in point: After ripping a puppy in half, Niamy summons the Legio Cornu, which are men with the heads of unicorns in space marine armor with nuclear assault rifles. And Commander John Shephard, of Mass Effect leads them.
- Goku/Anne Frank: Until the End of Time. A Crossover of Dragon Ball Z and The Diary of Anne Frank. Anne and Goku hook up. It all ends with a Super Saiyan battle between Goku and Hitler. It is so stupid, it becomes the definition of awesome. There is an old Something Awful thread where the author, who is a goon, confirmed that it was a Troll Fic.
- HART SHAPED LOVE, a fanfic that begins with Edward and Bella going to Hogwarts and meeting the Team Fortress 2 characters there, then tons of Mary Sues and other fandoms are thrown in.
- How You Remind Me is a The Secret Show/Mario crossover which also includes Pokémon for some reason. The plot is basically Mario and his gang working together with Victor and Anita and some Original Characters to rescue Doctor Doctor from Bowser. Its author Voltalia, who had just gotten out of junior high when she wrote it, may as well consider this an Old Shame.
- The Huemn Ceniped 2 The Humen Milipede is a horrific fanfic of the even more horrific movie, The Human Centipede, which tells the tale of
Dr.HeiterDoktor Scientis building a "humen milipeed" and then the Men in Black arrive "2 take the evidance" and they all become "powar rangers"... just... just read it here.
- Loves Heartstrings by Sue Mary is a gripping tale of romance against all odds between Hannah Montana and... Po of Kung Fu Panda. Features hillariously bad spelling and a Ron the Death Eater version of Billy Ray Cyrus. Read it here: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6672938/1/Loves_Heartstrings
- Two works by Starjeffery (see above), Paint the Town and Time Machine, got a "remake with a twist" by SuperHarry2. The twist? Instead of being about Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings, it stars characters from Grand Theft Auto, Saints Row and Bully. One could argue that it's better than the originals because it has an ending and follows up on the "strange man watching them" subplot (kind of). It does feature Officer Tenpenny raping a teenage boy (Gary Smith), which is even Squickier than the original Snape/Frodo scene in Time Machine. Still, with surprise cameos by Midna and Salem, Rios and Clyde, it's awesomely awful.
- The Pooh's Adventures series on YouTube. Basically, it's just people taking Disney movies and adding clips of Winnie the Pooh in, using subtitles to make it look like Pooh and the movie characters are interacting. All of them are pretty much the same, yet there's a strange temptation to watch, just to see how Pooh will be incorporated. See the wiki for more details. Yes, they have a wiki.
- The Return of Dark Kyeoto is a batshit insane, one chapter fanfic featuring Namine from Kingdom Hearts as an angel who could do kamehamehas and Wrath from Fullmetal Alchemist who fight against some guy named Dark Kyeoto with the help of their companions who I guess are OCs. Spelling errors galore in this story.
- Sadako - An Uchiha Heroine is a Naruto/iCarly crossover that's only one chapter long so far, but it's an experience for what it has as of now. What starts off as your standard Uchiha "Sasuke's sister" Sue Fic becomes so much more, featuring Rukia, Sam and Freddie as characters, shoehorned-in Christian themes including Sadako speaking to God himself, and lyrics plagiarized from The Hunch Back Of Notre Dame. Even more strange is the fact that the author is very competent, but appears to be completely serious about it.
- The Soul of a Wizard. Initially, it's a series of Harry Potter one-offs, but it spirals rapidly into fandom after fandom, ranging from Death Note to Channel Awesome before citing other fanfics. Rare is the Troll Fic whose author has Shown Their Work, and rarer still is one that shows this grand a degree of research. MrTrollXDD knows all of the ins, outs, methods, and targets (not to mention several examples) of hack authors and trolls very well, and is not afraid to play with them in countless methods, such as exaggerating Rouge Angles of Satin to the point where one chapter spirals well beyond comprehension, or inverting Linkara's character, down to the specific authors and arcs he hates. The rather humorous image of Ron Weasley's verbally articulate ding-a-ling being used as a power drill will be stuck in your head forever.
- As one reviewer put it:
- The fanfic Street Fighter vs. Mortal Kombat (links to two separate MSTs by one group; the original is presumed to be lost). The obvious premise of the Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat cast duking it out is mostly cast aside in favor of the story of a Marty Stu Self Insert and his best friend, an eight-year-old kid with a hockey stick who can turn himself invincible at will. Everyone acts out of character and the writing is impressively vague. Despite the premise, every fight plays out like the Marvel Super Heroes vs. Street Fighter matches at the beginning, with fighters throwing out combos and special moves like mere jabs while calling out each one of the latter in its own all-caps paragraph no matter how mundane. Oh, and inexplicably, the 3 Ninjas show up working for Shinnok. The whole thing is charming in a goofy way.
- Tails Gets Trolled (NSFW). Ostensibly a fan comic where characters from Sonic the Hedgehog, Super Mario Bros. and other properties brutally kill Internet Trolls just for insulting them, it rapidly gained an ironic fandom upon being discovered by Something Awful for its dubious art quality, bizarre dialogue, gratuitous violence, frequent crimes against grammar and spelling, lack of coherence and random plot twists. Perhaps one of the most surreal things to come out of the Sonic fandom.
- The Twilight Tale of Bellafly is a My Little Pony Friendship is Magic and Twilight crossover riddled with spelling errors, blatant plot holes, inaccuracies, and looks as if it was constructed by a ten-year-old who only watched the trailers for Twilight. Extremely funny to read.
- Web of Dimensions is a Pokémon/Digimon/Sailor Moon crossover fic has to be read to be believed. Notable in that the author went on to become Linkara.
- WORLD WAR II. It's full of bad formatting, weird incomprehensible phrases and hilariously bad writing. And it's got Theodore Roosevelt fighting Hitler and the Japanese in World War II that for some strange reason took place in the 1700's... It's just got to be experienced to be believed. Maybe you should watch for this fanfic author as well. Possibly a Troll Fic? Dramatic Reading here.
- It contains Godzilla. That makes it a crossover.
- The Quest for the Holey Grail is a hilariously bad crossover between Arthurian Legend, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Indiana Jones, and a host of other things. Features such madness as the Holey Grail actually being the Goblet of Fire, a man made of blood, and Doctor Who sending the heroes to the past, where they eat chicken wings.
- Behold the masterpiece that is Burning Rings of Fire. Kanye West gets his dick ripped off in the third sentence by a zombie Johnny Cash, and it just gets crazier from there. Involving everyone from Katniss Everdeen to Garfield, this sadly unfinished piece of art is a sight to behold. Dramatic Reading here.
- X-Com: Mass Effect. Even for a Mass Effect crossover, already infamous for a tendency to make humanity overpowered, this story stands out for its ridiculously overpowered humanity. Long story short: All humans are now part of a hive mind, are immortal, can survive nearly any environment, have ridiculously powerful technology (even though it makes absolutely no sense and completely contradicts how technologies actually work in the XCOM canon), have ships so powerful that a single one of them took out nearly one hundred batarian ships (who are, of course, portrayed as Always Chaotic Evil). Add in tons of Unfortunate Implications about slavery, Protagonist-Centered Morality, an entire paragraph of Costume Porn that has to be seen to be believed, and random elements from Halo, and you have a spectacularly bad crossover. See it torn apart on Library Of The Damned here.
- Eventually, even the author realized how bad the story was, and began a complete rewrite... Unfortunately, the rewrite is arguably even worse than the original. With such "gems" as an official document describing one of humanity's starships as "shaped like it's namesake from the Stargate Television Series" and humanity's policy for contacting alien species as "similar to the well known Prime Directive from 'Star Trek'" (whoever wrote it should really watch less TV). Also, humanity predicted the horrific outcomes of the Krogan Rebellions and the Geth War before they happened, yet stubbornly refuse to do anything to stop them. Despite all that, they become angry enough to threaten to exterminate the turians and the quarians after they used the Genophage and tried to shut down the geth, respectively, conveniently ignoring how the krogans committed many war crimes and atrocities during the Rebellions and the geth wiped out more than 99% of the quarians in retaliation for trying to shut them down. If anything, this version of humanity is even more self-righteous and unlikable than the previous version. Fortunately, the rewrite died after only one chapter.
- Portal is more or less just a Star Wars/Star Trek Who Would Win debate with the barest hints of badly-written connective tissue to make it a story. What puts it here is that it's a really bad Who Would Win debate, and has remained Snark Bait for years on sites like StarDestroyer.net. Highlights include every Star Wars weapon being useless because one time Picard said an enemy's lasers wouldn't get through the shields, the Death Star's power source being described as a nuclear fusion reactor to justify calling it primitivenote , Leia being amazed at the existence of Data when she was essentially raised by Ridiculously Human Robots, The Force inexplicably not working on Star Trek characters, and hyperdrive being slower than warp drive despite all canon to the contrary. What follows is several chapters of Curb-Stomp Battle, including the Enterprise-E wiping out entire fleets of Star Destroyers and Deanna Troi defeating Emperor Palpatine, so brazen that it sort of runs all the way around to being hilarious in how God-Mode Sue the Federation is made out to be. It's often opposed to the equally notorious Star Destroyers Rampant, which is every bit as much of a stupidly-reasoned Curb-Stomp Battle for the other side, but with even less pretense of being a story to the point of being unreadable.
Anime & Manga
- The Battle is apparently a short Yu-Gi-Oh fanfic that goes nowhere. It starts with the author inserting somebody named "Trey" who apparently knows karate and beats a bully up. Then they appear out of nowhere inside Yugi's head, then they appear at Yugi's game shop. Infamously, the author even pairs himself up with one of the female characters, Anzu.
- BECAUSE I'M GERMANY is a hilariously well-written (as in, not having horrid grammar) Troll Fic (usually have) from the Axis Powers Hetalia fandom. The title itself is the Catch-Phrase of the titular character whenever he was asked why he "LIKE TO KEEP IT WARM IN A NICE DOG", or anything else he did, really. Insanity includes repeated use of "KAWAII DESU" and some Gratuitous French and Spanish, Engrish done by -of course- Japan, someone getting impregnated by TWO BEARS, whale becoming president, Mpreg, alien babies, necrophiliac, so on, so on...
- Dragonball N is a piece of flash animation so terrible it's utterly brilliant. 'I can't help but save the day!'
- Fullmetal Alchemist fanfic Fuery Plus Havoc Equals Love seems to go out of its way to be as awkward as possible without being a poorly written Lemon. The entirety of it consists of Havoc backing Fuery into a closet, while Fuery is randomly worrying about whether Havoc knows about his undying love for him. Havoc tells Fuery he loves him, and panics because he thinks he ruined their friendship. Fuery confesses that he loves Havoc too, they make out, and their clothes fall off. Mustang and Edward then walk past where the two were having their... event, and they act like they saw something only slightly abnormal and shrug it off almost immediately after fleeing the scene. The whole thing is hilarious, but Havoc has a line shortly after Mustang and Edward find him and Fuery that is pure gold. This is so awful that one can't help but enjoy it.
- (goku nd freeza becum frinds).
- Hailing from Mobile Suit Gundam 00, the fandom got a horribly-written fanfic entitled Gundam 00M: Marina's Figth posted on 4chan's /m/ board. It's full of typos, Gratuitous Japanese (also misspelled at times) and creative licensing with the titular character, much to the excitement of those who normally hated her. Also featured were some crossover characters from other Gundam series and historical figures such as Eisenhower. As a result, many readers of the supposed troll's piece found themselves laughing hysterically. Unfortunately, the threads were never archived, but this seems to contain all chapters which actually existed.
- Hamtaro 2, created by LegendofWii. The videos are gone but it had to have been seen to believed.
- Also by the same guy, My Roommate's a Pokémonï¿½ No, seriously.
- Light and Dark - The Adventures of Dark Yagami. Light's evil(er) twin brother Dark comes to visit Light's family (in America), and brings with him the king of the Shinigami and his Death Note, which lets you kill someone without knowing their face... or name. Sayu meanwhile turns out to be a lesbian and seduces Misa to steal her Death Note, while Yotsuba&! makes an accidental crossover. Oh, and Light uses the horrifying phrase "better make it a foursome" in reference to his brother and sister IN FRONT OF HIS PARENTS in the most scarring Oh, Cisco! moment ever.
- The same author's short-lived attempt at a Harry Potter fanfic, Who Is Voldemorts Dad? The Tales of Vernon Dursly!, is equally so-stupid-it's-utterly-hilarious.
- It contains the exchange, "WHAT? BUT I KILLED YOU!" "Then you did not kill me hard enough". This alone is pretty much worth the price of admission.
- The same author's short-lived attempt at a Harry Potter fanfic, Who Is Voldemorts Dad? The Tales of Vernon Dursly!, is equally so-stupid-it's-utterly-hilarious.
- It is almost impossible to accurately describe Love's Grande Quest without breaking out in laughter. It is a Haruhi Suzumiya fic... but Haruhi doesn't appear at all. Her role is given to an obvious Purity Sue. The prose is so ridiculously over-the-top that at least one reviewer called it Crazy Awesome. Mikuru is a "dragon maiden" and the villains are so cartoonish and Obviously Evil that one has to wonder how the main character ever thought they were trustworthy in the first place.
- Meduka meguca is a series of 4chan forum posts intentionally badly reciting the events of Puella Magi Madoka Magica. Full of spelling errors and horrendous Off-Model pictures, it is nevertheless true to the plot and so extremely awesome it achieved Memetic Mutation status.
- Nareto: The Scret of Shiobi is pure comedy gold, including things like the "Acutesushi" and Zabuza coming back to life to eat Might Guy's corpse.
- Ojamajo Doremi Rise Of The Shadows is an Ojamajo Doremi fic that gives a viable premise that is sadly ruined by bad pacing, generic plot, bland villains, an Ass Pull or two, and finally a Deus ex Machina. It has spelling and grammar errors along with a few internal notes. The author herself even flat out says in some notes that she "[does] not care". The rants she gives are relatively laughable, so it makes up for it there.
- One night of the drop of rain is an Axis Powers Hetalia fanfic in the same way Lisa is Pregnant is a Simpsons fanfic. It reads like a "Blind Idiot" Translation, with bits of other languages that didn't quite translate peppered throughout, but from the looks of it, it wouldn't have made much sense in its original language anyway. The story begins with America and England having sex (or something) when Canada bursts in and professes his love for America. Then Kumajirou shows up and professes his love for Canada, except he turns into Alaska and... you know what, there's no coherent plot to be found. Nothing we could say could possibly do it justice. Read it for yourself, if you want to make sense of it—not that that provides much of a clearer picture.
- Amazing how much WTF-ery can be put into so few words. It seems that Canada is raping England at one point... or something. And then it got to where Kumajrou/Alaska raped and killed Canada when he rejected its love... or did something. It turns out that the reader is America (who's apparently a she) and the narrator is England... apparently. And then America and England embrace each other again as if nothing happened. It's even more surreal than it sounds.
- And then there's the random line "boku wa roshia," which is Gratuitous Japanese for "I am Russia." Is this supposed to have been written by him?
- And then there's a line in the fic that confirms that this fanfic was indeed a "Blind Idiot" Translation: "_TRANSLATION ERROR_ said the England in the surprised."
- Amazing how much WTF-ery can be put into so few words. It seems that Canada is raping England at one point... or something. And then it got to where Kumajrou/Alaska raped and killed Canada when he rejected its love... or did something. It turns out that the reader is America (who's apparently a she) and the narrator is England... apparently. And then America and England embrace each other again as if nothing happened. It's even more surreal than it sounds.
- Pokémon: Attack of Mewtwo, in which
MewtwoMewthree blows up Oak's lab for no reason and the Mary Sue protagonist's Pokémon are altered using "genetics" to fight his clone army. The spelling and grammar are what really make the fic. Possibly a Troll Fic. Definitely bad.
- Snow Angels is a Haruhi Suzumiya fic that focuses on Yuki and Mikuru. If you think that this is here for Relationship Writing Fumbles, you are dead wrong. This fic is listed here because of the over-the-top wackiness and Narm. Canon is thrown out the window practically from the first chapter due to Rule of Cool, featuring such gems as Mikuru getting a Humongous Mecha and a dinosaur, and pretty much every battle is a Curb Stomp. Sadly, it has now been taken down.
- Teh Wirst Fanfic Evar!!1 is the creation of some people who can actually write, done as a jape to mock horrible fanfiction. Succeeds hilariously. Included: toe rape.
- Todai Days is an Azumanga Daioh fic featuring the girls at Tokyo University (which BTW is almost Japan's equivalent to Harvard)note , where they're picked up by some self insert Gary Stus. What puts this fic in this column is Kaorin turning from Shrinking Violet Schoolgirl Lesbian to full-bore Ax-Crazy Yandere when Sakaki goes out with one of the guys, beating them nearly to death almost once every chapter. Narmiest line: "No, he's gonna pay! IN BLOOD!!!"
- Tokyo Crystal Mew is your standard Tokyo Mew Mew Spin-Offspring fanfic, or it would be if it weren't turned into its own animated series using MS Paint and Windows Movie Maker. After the initial shock wears off, it kind of becomes hard to outright hate it. (Especially the later episodes, which show an improvement in the artwork and pacing.) Even 4chan has the occasional Fan Art thread dedicated to it.
- Voltes V vs Voltron: the Godaikin Wars The only English language Voltes V fanfic on the Net is an eighty-four chapter of what appears to be an angry Voltes V fanboy's treatise on his irrational hatred for Voltron. With the superficial premise of a villain named Paul the Imjad stealing the Galaxy Alliance's "Encyclopedia Universale" microfilm and framing the Voltes team for it; both villain and microfilm were completely forgotten in favor of Voltron having sound effect-laden battles with Voltes V, as well as Combattler V, Daimos, Science Ninja Team Gatchaman and even Space Sheriff Shaider, and gets its ass handed to it every time. The Voltron Team's canon heroic personalities were all thrown out of the window and replaced with straw Jerkass and Straw Loser attributes in an attempt of the author to discredit them, but it's all to anviliciously drive the point that Voltron is absolute crap and is not deserving of all the attention. Add the Rouge Angles of Satin, blatant plagiarism note , outright Flanderization note , one Poison Oak Epileptic Tree after another, and the rather amusing posturing of the author in response to the angry Voltron fans (just read his "answer" to said Voltron fan here); and we get an epic Fan Wank of the highest order.
- Chlorine Grown Roses is a Free! badfic. Chock-full of spelling and grammar errors, unnecessary ellipses, declarations of the author's love for yaoi, and emoticons inserted in dialogue, it features an emo Mary Sue who seems to cry every ten seconds named Azusa Kimber Tachibana, who is the extremely wealthy, orphaned long-lost cousin of Makoto Tachibana. One day, after getting a random letter in the mail from Makoto, she moves to Japan with her cousin. Later in the fic, another self-insert, this time of the beta reader, Akira Tomuson, is introduced. Azusa is paired with Rin Matsuoka.
- What Lies in a Puzzle, a Yu-Gi-Oh! fanfic that takes the premise of Pegasus conquering the world and does little to nothing with it, contains numerous spelling and grammar errors that marginally improve as the story goes on, a hilarious way the Yugis figure out the Mind Shuffle, and an ending that can be seen coming from a mile away simply because Yugi has all five Exodia pieces.
- The Darker Knight is a self-admitted Batman Troll Fic. After being falsely accused of murder, Batman teams up with his cousin (aptly named "Batcousin") to hunt down Two-Face. Hilarity Ensues... as well as a bajillion celebrity cameos.
- Garfield in: "Along Came a Splut" had to rank as one of the most nonsensical fanfics ever written. The plot, if it can even be called that, makes no sense at all, and abuses Massive Multiplayer Crossover without any given explanation, and combines callous character behavior (Garfield throws Odie to the moon for just being in his way) with inexcusable bouts of Cowboy BeBop at His Computer (It starts with Garfield playing a video game about a guy named Metroid, and later he encounters a guy literally named Blade Runner, who runs on roller blades) and tops it all off with one heck of a Gainax Ending, ripped almost wholesale from 2001: A Space Odyssey. It had to be read to be believed. Eventually, the author came forward and said that the story was a Troll Fic written as a cheap joke in literally half an hour, and he also disowned it due to its needlessly mean spirited content. He took the story offline altogether, making it impossible to read the fic now.
- Once upon a time, a Batman fan decided to write a song parody. Specifically, one based on "Poker Face" entitled "Joker Face". Though painfully obvious, the idea isn't without potential... but not when the "parody" consists only of the original lyrics with "Joker" in place of "poker".
- Peter's Revelation, a FoxTrot fanfic that re-defines Random Events Plot.
Films — Live-Action
- The Human Centipede: Love at First Bite. MST here. A PWP fic that attempts to make the original film lighter and softer by pairing a Mary Sue with Doctor Heiter, who's lost all his evil depravity and just wants to boff her brains out. Would be in So Bad, It's Horrible territory if it weren't for the author's use of unusual euphemisms such as "his bratwurst" "her Santa's Grotto" and "plundering the village". The FanFiction Critic also mocks it here.
- Root Her!, an utterly insane Jurassic Park fanfic that revolves around an extra named "Joffrey" (apparently named after the actor who played him) getting raped to death and eaten by a female velociraptor while Muldoon watches and masturbates. It would normally be horrifying were it not for the fact that the author was obviously having a blast trying to think of the most ludicrous Purple Prose and unusual euphemisms imaginable to refer to what's going on; the act of Muldoon jerking off is referred to as him "energetically pumping his purple shotgun", the raptor is described as a "carrion-scented Aphrodite", Joffrey gets sprayed with "putrid velociraptor love Tabasco", the word "velocigina" is used at one point... it just goes on and on in a carousel of WTF-ery. Read the Topless Robot MST-ing of it here.
- The worst thing about this? The author actually seems to be a competent writer.
- Yoda. And. Tequila.
- The infamous My Immortal, a plotless Harry Potter fic that stars Ebony Dark'ness Dementia
Raven TaraRaven Way, a "goff" [end sarcasm quotes] Mary Sue pastiche (mostly Jerk Sue) with "icy blue eyes like limpid tears" who's So Beautiful, It's a Curse. The author managed to turn everyone into either a goth"goffik" or a prep (like Dumbledore, who has a robe with Avril Lavigne on it) and the spelling gets worse and worse through the fanfic. Whether she's a troll or if the author was serious when she wrote it is under debate, but if it's a joke, that means she's one of the most meticulous trolls in history. It's the only fanfic that's been turned into a movie and a published novel. It's also been translated into a dozen languages.
- My Immortal isn't so bad it's good, it's so horrible it's awesome.
- The part about being translated into a dozen languages is especially impressive, since it was barely even written in English. Try listening to a dramatic reading of it without reading along.
- Celebrian has a whole meta-game around it based on trying to get people with weak stomachs to read it. Even then, the story has its fans simply for being full of Narm and for being so laughably over-the-top in its Squickiness that it Crosses the Line Twice. Someone even started a dramatic reading.
Reviewer: It's not that it's so disgusting, but it goes ON AND ON. And it's so BORING. How can torture, S&M and all that other crap be so irrevocably BORING? Half the time I don't even go 'ew'. I just look at the scroll bar and think, "What? Not even halfway through? GOD!"
- Not nearly as bad, but still a sterling example of how crappy fanfiction can get, is the Harry Potter tale called A Sad Story. It's a oneshot wherein Harry is regularly beaten by Uncle Vernon, falls in love with a girl with her own abusive guardian, and is killed. The author doesn't give a damn about continuity, characterization, or common sense. ('... he grabbed Harry by the neck and dragged him to the garden Shed. He padlocked the door with at least 20 locks.')
- "... His Uncle then pulled out a shotgun, with a silencer on it..."
- Or Uncle Vernon's line, "It's too late, my dear".
- "After the Abuse, Part One" commits the cardinal sin of making My Immortal look coherent by comparison. It turns Snape into an Ax-Crazy psychopath who brutalizes and murders the Dursleys for unspecified "abuse" of Harry, then decides to randomly commit a terrorist attack by blowing up a city with a nuclear bomb. Oh, and in case you're wondering, there's no Part Two.
- the awesome adventures of amynda in the fayz!!!!! is basically My Immortal meets the Gone series. It has literally no plot, manages to combine No Bisexuals with Everyone Is Bi, and has such egregious Protagonist-Centered Morality that the "good guys" literally whip young children for fun, while the "antagonists" don't seem to be guilty of anything but existing.
- The Harry Potter fanfic "Becoming Female". It starts off as the usual Harry-is-turned-into-a-girl-by-a-potion-accident-and-gets-paired-with-Draco story, but then it gets
worsebetter. All the male characters disliked by the author, particularly Ron, are "sexist" in a ridiculously over-the-top manner and even refer to themselves as "sexist". Female characters disliked by the author tolerate this and are thus considered "sluts". Might be a Troll Fic, but it's hard to tell as the author claims it's partially a comedy, which would explain the occasional random humor ("At that moment, Dumbledore rode into the hospital wing on a unicycle wearing an old-fashioned bathing suit."). You can see a Dramatic Reading of the first half of chapter one here.
- The Troll Fic hypothesis seems likely, given that each chapter starts with an utterly insane description of what all the female character are wearing, as well as the near-constant "I also had underwear on".
- There's a sporking here. There used to be a sequel titled "Being Female", but it seems to have been deleted. It included a memorable part where "Crystal" is sent back to live with the Dursleys, who turn out to be "Christian fundamentalists" and the portrayal is as ridiculous as you're imagining. The first chapter, at least, survives here.
- Another Harry Potter fanfic with the delightful name of The Chronicles of Merlin: The Return, which features Harry as the reincarnation of Merlin. Pretty much everyone (save maybe Ron and Hermione) are Out of Character, and includes such gems as Draco inviting Harry to stay over the summer, but adding "My father still has a problem with mixed bloods and the poor, so Ron and Hermione can't come".
- What happens when you take an original-flavour Harry Potter Mary Sue, pair her with Ron the Death Eater and heap on the Deus Angst Machina until it crosses the line from tragedy to hilarity and sends her into the willing arms of Draco Malfoy? You get Dark Secrets, which can be read in its NSFW entirety here.
- Deserving, which is what you get if you combine the plot coherence of My Immortal, the prose composition of The Eye of Argon and the tastefulness of FATAL. Featured on weepingcock twice, and described by one sporker as "not quite as bad as Hogwarts Exposed".
- A similar Twilight Badfic by the name of Forbidden Fruit: The Temptation of Edward Cullen. Atlantiana Rebekah "Tiaa" Loren, a moody young lady who speaks in internet acronyms, enrolls at Forks High, where she promptly grabs everyone's attention, including that of
the hawt pale guyEdward Cullen, who is now speaking a baffling combination of Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe and ALL CAPS, a 'fat and bald' uncle who subjects her to two paragraphs of IKEA Erotica rape, and a 'tall white man' who announces himself to be her father. Combine this with the protagonist's status as a gothic vampire and the fact that the story positivley thrives on Rouge Angles of Satin, and claims that this may be My Immortal's greatest rival thus far don't seem too far off. Also, there's a talking panda bear. A talking, gay panda bear.
- Forbidden Love: The Iliad. It's only one paragraph long, but what a paragraph it is. The fact that it's about the freaking Iliad only makes it worse.
- The Girl Who Lived series, a half-rewrite (the other half is just ported directly from the actual books themselves with minor tweaks) of the Harry Potter books with a Gender Flip and a whole lot of other changes. Pretty much the biggest and most direct Canon Defilement possible, it starts out by arrogantly decrying J.K. Rowling for screwing up the series and goes about "fixing" it by removing every single one of Harry's flaws while also (intentionally or unintentionally) completely changing his personality to a Sociopathic "Hero". Instead of a ruthlessly oppressed kid living under the stairs that eventually becomes a mediocre wizard with heart, "Rose" is now the poster child of New Powers as the Plot Demands (with plenty of "hey, look at me, I'm cool!" stuff to go with it) while getting away with pretty much everything. Watch as the series completely paves over everything "bad" about the canon and introduces Plot Holes by the truckload! Marvel as Rose torments her "friends" in ways that make Voldemort seem tolerable! Endure as the series goes to extreme lengths for Author Appeal while denying it every step of the way! One would suspect a troll like My Immortal, but if so, it's certainly an obsessive one.
- Goffik Blood, another My Immortal clone that would probably be unremarkable if not for how completely and utterly bizarre it is. As one would imagine, the spelling and grammar are atrocious, but it's also littered with author's notes in which the writer halts the plot to make strange proclamations like "LUV TRAUMAS R ZO HOT" or "vampyrs arnt homo sapeins", and to call the story itself a Random Events Plot would be a severe understatement. It has something to do with Mary Sue character Goffika Sorrows randomly falling in love with Voldemort (also known in-story as "Volxemort", "VOLDEMRTRT", and on one notable occasion, "VOLDNEBGREOUUBU"), and then killing him, Enoby herself making a cameo only to die as well, Voldemort inexplicably coming back to life to get "TREVENGE", only to fall in love with Goffika and rape her "sexily", a skirt that can destroy things, Hagrid getting sacrificed to "Stan", a talking horse that was actually Goffika's friend Blood who also raped her but then didn't... really, absolutely nothing in this fic follows logically from anything else. The entire thing is a huge, poorly-spelled Mind Screw.
- Harry Potter, Gay Demon, a fanfic about how Harry wakes up one day looking incredibly sexy. He then proceeds to have sex with anything from Sirius in dog form to all five Weasly brothers at once. He somehow winds up being Hogwarts' (and, namely, Draco's) Sex Slave. Notable for the massive cock sizes, absurd amounts of semen, emphasis on Harry's 'man-pussy' and its usage of Not If They Enjoyed It Rationalizations.
- Harry's Darkness—it's like My Immortal the Slash and M Preg edition.
- Hermione's New Change is about Hermione finding out she's adopted and is actually Draco's cousin, and of course they enter an incestuous relationship. Only the first two chapters are here because it was deleted from the original site, but it still contains some gems.
- Here is a copy of the full story.
- Hermione's Talent is basically what you get if you throw My Immortal into a blender with Jerry Springer and Glee. It's every bit as hilariously terrible as you'd expect. The fraction of the fic that isn't copy-pasted anachronistic song lyrics sports horrible spelling and grammar and everyone says "fuck" every other word. There are no descriptions, everyone is wildly OOC and Hermione's actual talent is nowhere to be seen. And as if all that wasn't enough, there's a random pointless rape scene.
- HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, a.k.a. Thirty Hs. Think My Immortal if it were written by Tenacious D on paper made of the brain matter of David Cronenberg using a pen made of a severed dragon cock turned into a Super Soaker, and Liquid Schwartz was the ink. Particularly impressive in that it's so indescribably twisted that it has no flames in over a hundred reviews. Warning: starts out somewhat squicky, but gets much worse after about chapter three.
- A full dramatic reading
- "Bugger your Darkmeal, faggart of a thousand suns."
- "And what of it? Is it a sin, should a man feel like faggarting a sun or a thousand? Why should the suns heave through the void, if not to be skewer't bypon ourn fagpoles?"
- Dumbledore's immortal line, "Harry, you must rock the fuck out."
- A full dramatic reading
PropheciesProphices is likely a trollfic, but it's still hilarious as it can be. It's a Warrior Cats fanfic and you've really just got to see it to believe it.
- Part of what makes it so hilarious is that, with its actually okay-ish grammar and spelling, it genuinely seems like a ten-year-old girl doing her damnedest.
- Hogwarts Exposed, in general it's just plain bad but some of the dialogue edges into So Bad, It's Good. "Most certainly it's wrong to expose your private area!"
- Hogwarts of Heaven by Silver Suffering. Every single chapter of this... thing makes no sense. Here is an example with the first sentence. "Chestere Le Valiente played a rocking electric guitar solo on his shiny wooden saxaphone and wondered what life would be like if he was a female 16 year old Indonesian gymnast who was secretly working to bring down the government and force the world to wear pink tuxedos." Random cameos include Squall Leonhart, Penelope Pitstop, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Chuck Norris, Shinji Ikari and Dorothy Zbornak. Also, the author seems to plan to write 100 chapters of this...
- Horny demigods and gods is a Percy Jackson fanfic by Connorkenway00 is either this or a masterfully done trollfic. The author's first fanfic, the story or lack thereof, writing style, title and description, and less than strong grammar fit the definition of smut to a T. The spontaneous sex scenes and bizarre dialogue, such as Annabeth's "sexist bra" is side splitting.
- The Harry Potter fanfic Imma Wiserd deserves some mention; the story is beyond absurd. Everyone is a gangster or a white "rassist" in Hogwarts, including Harry Potter who as it turns out is black but a white actor was chosen instead for the audience. Perhaps its defining sequence is a game of Qudditch where not only are all the houses in play, but the Ravenclaw team are all killed by Voldemort before the match begins, leaving the lead characters Soulja and Harry to win the game... and then the Ku Kux Klan appear and start shooting at the protagonists.
- The writer of this is hilariously convinced that Snape is a Jew because he knows big words (i.e. non-slang words) and thus has him use a giant dollar bill like a flying carpet. Later on, Hermione decides not to travel back in time, to when Biblical figures attended Hogwarts (!) with Pontius Pilate (Or "Pumpass Pilot") as headmaster (!!), based on the absence of pretty dresses and sewing machines (!!!) in the past.
- Did we mention that Hermione's Patronus is a vacuum cleaner?
- Recently rediscovered by snarker Serkadios, Twilight fanfic The Kronicals of Rebecca Swansin has been sitting on fanfiction.net for about two years, almost completely unnoticed. Since being found, though, it has gained love (and several headcanons and one Fan Fic, possibly with more coming soon) by the same people who brought you the Brewdening Love Expanded Universe.
- The Last War would be terrible for the way it turns Harry into a Gary Stu, Ron into an abusive monster, Hermione into a Distressed Damsel and later a murderer and bigamist who never faces any consequences and Ginny into the third Fat Slag. However, the overwrought angst drives it here instead. Even before they start dancing to "Always" by Erasure, whose connotations seem to have escaped the author.
- Legolas: Back to the Future, which is basically a Canadian teenage girl's diary with Legolas stuck in somehow. Notable for its aggressive wholesomeness and lack of nearly any standard "Fictional Character is 'Bamfed' Into The Real World" tropes. The fic's gone from fanfiction.net now, but you can find an MSTing here.
- Particular note must be made of the shamelessly blatant Mary Sueness of main character Crystal, who reveals her self as (in no particular order): an excellent cook, singer, musician, dancer, horseback rider, mechanic, a practitioner of La Savatenote capable of throwing standing kicks above Legolas' head, a church youth group leader, possessing of a Death Glare that could cow anyone (including Legolas) and she teaches a music classnote at the local community center. And oh yeah, she's also telepathic and telekinetic.
- legolas by laura is a masterpiece of terrible spelling, worse grammar, Beige Prose, and incredible amounts of Narm ("... and then one of the Orcs striped her and then he raped her and then Laura said "go away you bastard"."). Best experienced in hammy Dramatic Reading form, courtesy of Man Without A Body: 
- Moon Daughter: According to one reviewer, "So this is what Percy Jackson would look like if it was written by a 13-year-old with a low IQ while high." It follows an emo Mary Sue, Flavia Knight, the only daughter of Artemis, as she hates on preps and blondes, bashes the Out of Character Canon cast, and tries to decide whether to be a virgin "like her mom" or seduce Nico di Angelo. Or Alabaster Torrington. Or Hades. Or Chiron... (the list goes on.) Also features Mr. D. watching porn, Annabeth being turned into a "grape with no soul," and lines such as:
"Hate drove me like preemium fule."
"Kronos laughed like Hitler after killing a Jew."
- My first Christmas with Harry potter. Yes, it's awful wish fulfilment. But it's worth it to see dialogue like this:
"Harry potter stop your going to make me drop this." missy said giggling"Hey you did promise me that we could have some adult fun time when I got home from work." Harry said"Ok we will have some adult fun time now." missy said
- Passion Night, a mercifully short Lupin/Sirius Slash Fic complete with IKEA Erotica, 10-inch wangs and lovingly described fluids. Not to mention Shapeshifting Squick. Features the following hilarious exchange (yes, all those vowels were in the original):
"COME ON BABY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Sirius shouted.
"IF I GO ANY FASTER WE WILL BE AT HYPER SPEEEEEED!" Lupin shouted trying not to moan while he shouted.
- Phoenix's Life is a Harry Potter fanfic which has achieved legendary status on Pottersues for one Narmtastic line:
- Pride & Predujice, the Wedding Edition is an anachronistic, horribly-spelled Pride and Prejudice fanfic involving a werewolf-fighting Lizzy Bennet, an armour-plated Pemberley, laser-eyed Edward Rochester, and Jane Eyre wielding nunchuks.
- The Redwall fanfic Shadow Rapes Matthias. Well, at least you can't say it doesn't deliver what it promises. Crash course: Matthias is the mouse hero, and Shadow is the ninja-thief-rat sent by the villain to infiltrate Redwall Abbey. In canon, they were onstage together for about three seconds, which consisted of a fight/chase scene as Shadow attempted to get the MacGuffin back to his boss. MST'd here. Be warned that Matthias is, for no apparent reason but the obvious, noted to be 13, at least according to Word of God and the TV series. The author's note which says so could be a clumsily phrased attempt at saying he's meant to be older in the fic, but just in case. The same author did two more fics, featuring Martin the Warrior and numerous other male characters performing physically implausible actions, which are also MSTed on the linked blog. Watch out for the completely random Spellsinger Shout-Out.
"The high warm sun shone down on Cluny the Scourge ..."
- The MST is nothing short of brilliant, for all three of this horrible author's works. Bonus points for bringing in Romsca for the last MST, which turns out exactly as twistedly awesome as one could hope.
"Cluny was c-"
"If either of you finish that sentence, I'm going to hang you both from each other's intestinal tracts!"
- SHERLOK HOMS, a trollfic written by famous DA troll Manty 64 in which "Sherlok Homs", Ben, and Wallace Wells must catch "Soicide Mouse" and "Soicide Sonic".
- Shits Bricks, a seven-line "poem" about how Severus Snape... doesn't actually shit bricks but farts them.
- Again in Redwall, the Transplanted Character Fic Soulless Shell, found here. Loaded with Accidental Innuendo, No Punctuation Period, a Marty Stu to end all Marty Stus ... MST can be found here.
He slashed him in the stomach then he hit him on the floor now feel the pain that so many innocent young girls like her have felt but with oh so much more intensityLyulf: Huh, I guess the sword wasn't overcompensatin', love.
- Behold Nick The Swing's terrible, but hilarious, fan fiction of Harry Potter: Stand My Ground, the My Immortal Parody designed to exceed My Immortal!
- StarKitsProphcy. There are thousands of horrific Warrior Cats fanfics out there, due to its tendency to attract young readers who don't really understand the plot, but this one takes the cake. The "plot" begins when StarClan recieves a prophecy, obviously regarding a sparkling Mary Sue known as StarKit, proclaiming that "out of the darkness, stars will come and get rid of the evil tiger and holly." It goes downhill from there. StarGleam winds up with at least four toms in love with her (all of whom are much older than she is, and one of whom is her great grandfather), becomes a warrior after 3.14 days of apprenticeship, delivers the (brutally massacred) Ten Commandments (of which there are eleven) in an obvious attempt to evangelize the writer's own beliefs, takes over as leader when Firestar steps down for her, and has many more Rouge Angles of Satin-filled adventures. It's truly magnificent, be it a Troll Fic or not.
- Highlights include:
- "And held out... SOME JEW!"
- "GayStrip locked at hr meanly."
- "Wit a rar like an volcano erection she jumped at StarGlaem!"
- "'!' said StarPaw ass she ruan in to the forest. It wus to muck# she culdnt choss!"
- "'WHAT ARE O TRIG TO DO MOLE STRAEP ME?1?'"
- "'theyre names were DawnSpark;e and... Stick/ saud JayFeather."
- "Everyone jumped at the HoBare!"
- "AND THEN STARGLEAM WAS DIED!11!111!11111!1!11!"
- "'MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!11!1!1!11!' yelled StarGleamStar walking up. She juts culdnt be in loe with HawkForest she just could!11!1!11!"
- Highlights include:
- Thomas Joshman (first book, second book, third book, fourth book, fifth book, sixth book) is a series of... well, he never says they're Harry Potter fan fics, but it's set in a world just like Harry Potter. Almost every character or concept has a clear equivalent (Tom = Harry, Tim = Ron, Quelfree = Snape, Bendrist = Dumbledore, Milkenshland = Hogwarts, Teams 1-10 = the Houses, etc.), and it isn't unusual for actual phrases to be lifted (albeit misspelled and out of context) from the Harry Potter books themselves. It also includes bizarre dialogue, including quite a lot of ridiculously specific times ("He saw Quelfree scold Frederick for being on the pitch 2 ¼ seconds late"). Strange equivalents are chosen for Harry Potter's plot points - for example, whereas Harry was suspicious about the wound on Snape's leg, Tom was suspicious about Quelfree's "scrunchy face" (which I can only assume means that his face has been replaced with a hair tie). The author sometimes seems to forget which things are different from Harry Potter - for example, Milkenshland looks like a "normal human-looking school" in the first book, but it's a castle in the others, and the plane they take to school is referred to as a "train" at least twice. Some characters are also incredibly stupid, managing to forget key plot points just so that the reader can find them out in advance. Tom is even amazed that Tim knows the names of their closest friends, apparently never managing to learn them himself. Here are a few more quotes:
a Team 10 boy with blonde hair walked up the corridor and said "Haha its Joshy. His stupid famous 30 year old mother was a pile of sweaty socks. Births in 1981. She would've died if that idiot Joshy wasn't born".note
Quelfree looked like he just been battered by a bowling ball so Tom said to Tim "Has he been battered by a bowling ball" until Tim was confused and asked "What's a bowling ball" Tom said nevermind and Quelfree gave them both detentions for no reason.
"What's a Crinker" asked Tom. "Evil dolphins that can survive on land, they feed on Human and Wizard prey for jokes and cannibalize their own species when they die for fun" explained Tim. Suddenly a green eyed dolphin grabbed Tom's leg and it got bitten off. Tim helped Tom to the hospital quickly until Oswald met Tim again and tripped them over into the Crinkers. Tim lost an ear and a nose while Tom lost a hand and 3 eyelashes. Tom woke up in the hospital a week later with 50 bandages on him.
- Twila The Girl Who Waz In Luv With A Vampyre stars "Twila Beatiful Psyco Topaz Cullen" who was later renamed "Twila Beautiful Psyco Topaz Sad'ness Damian Cullen". It contains a gratuitous Buffi The Vampir Slayer Cameo, a thoroughly OOC Bella, now cast as an Alpha Bitch-esque cheerleader, Tiaa doing a Operation: Jealousy with Edward's dad who turns out the be the devil, and Edward, Twila, and Hamez killing Bella, and then eating her bed.
- The Warrior Cats of WolfClan series by Flamestripe of Wolfclan. A massive Marty Stu, ridiculous plot devices (like everything randomly going backwards, a cat with a cowboy hat, and talking wolves who bring cats back to life), a skewed sense of morality, how every single time a cat dies their tail twitches and they're okay, and the overblown nature of the story, create a masterpiece of bad writing.
- Warrior Mouse Code is a Warrior Cats fanfic... about the clans' prey. Bad grammar, a Marty Stu who, even though being a mouse, befriends Firepaw, is teased for being a half-breed,as a habit of spouting curse words constantly and is made 'second deputy' because that's just how the mouse clans work. Seriously.
- Winnie The Pooh Assimilated By The Borg. A Crack Fic of the highest order. The Borg invade the Hundred Acre Wood, murdering Rabbit before assimilating Pooh. The rest of the story consists of Pooh of Borg assimilating or murdering everyone, eventually ending with the entire cast part of the Collective or dead. Should be terrible, but the sheer over-the-top nature (Pooh of Borg kills Piglet over not sharing his honey) elevates it to this level.
- The very words "Pooh of Borg" alone justify the existence of this work.
- The Ben Chatham Adventures, a series famous among the Doctor Who fandom for the titular Marty Stu, blatant rip-offs of '70s Who, utterly detestable characters, excessive Flanderisation of canon characters, blatant misogyny and classism and frankly bizarre recurring features (Fox's Glacier Mints are apparently equivalent to class B drugs). Whether you believe it is really a Stealth Parody or not, there is something innately attractive about its Narm Charm, bizarre plot twists, and hilarious lines of dialogues such as "I am eternally grateful that you saved me from a good rogering by Henry VII!"
- Drug Lord Rapist — originally posted as durg lord rape - a Law & Order: Special Victims Unit fic in which we learn that
durgdrug lords have nothing better to do than skulk around in alleyways looking for unsuspecting Mary Sues and, well, guess.
- FESH PINCE BACK HAVEING FUN is a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air script fanfic done by a self-insert who can't really spell for shit, a story that doesn't really make sense, and a bunch of other oddities. Dug Seachang calls Carlton "Carton", Uncle Phil "Uncle Pill", and worst/best of all, Geoffrey "Giraffe"! It's almost like satire towards the 90's live comedy TV shows.
- The Mash fan-fic "THE GRAND RAPIDS O'REILLYS", in which every proper noun is in all capital letters. The first chapter is about RADAR marrying NURSE BIGALO while FATHER MULCAHY becomes a PENTECOSTAL minister after stealing barrels and barrels of holy water from THE VATICAN all because he has a dream in which GOD orders him to so. This is only the first chapter, there are over 25 chapters with titles such as "RADAR GOES FORMULA 1" "RADAR AND THE BLACK PANTHERS" "RADAR MEETS THE BEATLES" "RADAR MEETS THE GREEN HORNET" and "RADAR VS ROSEMARY'S BABY"
- That said, the story does contain this amusing Take That!: "FATHER MULCAHY was talking to SIDNEY FREEDMAN about a strange dream he'd had, which apparently was more of a nightmare because he said that he was the chaplain of a V.A. hospital in MISSOURI with COL. POTTER as the chief surgeon & KLINGER as the chief intern."
- The author of said fic is currently writing a screenplay called "NICK RUSSO VS JAMES DEAN", "an eight hour epic for theaters!"
- Me My Life And Glee is a Glee fanfic involving Canon Defilement, Major Out of Character-ness, Horrible Spelling / L33t L1ng0 and a character named Clarity Rosalina Ama'ranth Hillary Arwen Faith joining the glee club because of Santana, oh wait Mary Magdalene -as she is now called- telling her she needed to join. Afterwards pretty much every guy falls in love with her. Yes. Every single one. Though admitingly it is hilarious that her hair "shons in da Monlight" even though it's during the day. The whole thing slightly resembles My Immortal except that the author's personalities seem completely different. Possible Stealth Parody. It's not completed yet so hold on tight.
- Picard's Illumination. One of the few fanfics ever to combine Narm, Relationship Sue, and even Die for Our Ship into truly
Enterprisinglyentertainingly crappy Star Trek fanfic. The Sue ends up committing suicide so the Picard/Crusher ship isn't affected.
- The Star Trek fanfic "purr hormones", in which Spock and McCoy have badly-written sex with each other while being wildly Out of Character. Oh, and this is after McCoy has sprouted cat ears and a tail. He purrs when aroused. See the Dramatic Reading here. Immortal lines include, "The green blush grown on Spock's face. How could logic win against a hot purring Doctor?"
- Sinefield, a nonsensical Seinfeld fan fic with a plot that makes no sense and a load of typoes. It's likely a Troll Fic, but it's also hilarious, especially in this dramatic reading.
- Star Trek: The Next Fornication. Pretty much Exactly What It Says on the Tin. Contains the immortal line "'Surprise!' said Riker as he boned young Wesley up the ass."
- An in-universe example in the Supernatural fanfic Down to Agincourt: the poem Castiel is translating for Dean's amusement includes a self-insert narrator-slash-hero, a lot of contemplation of the supple curves of hippopotamuses, and the author's extremely shaky grasp of the language he's writing in.
- The Whose Line Is It Anyway? fanfic I Prooped My Pants counts. It follows four incredibly unlikeable fraternal quadruplets as they pursue romantic relationships with characters from Whose Line... Notable moments include a character coming out of a coma because his girlfriend threatens to break up with him if he doesn't and the Mafia kidnapping one of the protagonists but allowing her to use her cellphone as long as she doesn't call the cops.
- "A Raptor's Lust", an "erotic" fanfic starring a younger, 13-year-old Lara Croft and a velociraptor. MST-ed by Topless Robot here, this story gave the world a No Yay human-and-raptor "romance", some of the most extreme examples of Anatomically Impossible Sex, Rob's commentary degenerating into multiple lines of "HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE" and death threats against the author, and copious misuse of the verb "whickered".
- The aftermath of Ashe's life, a Final Fantasy XII fanfic by Ashe 10 that centers around Ashe having sex. A lot. As Ashe says, "All queens are not all innocent. I am just a nasty queen. What do you expected?" She also has a tendency to call her lovers sexy mutha fuckas. Although Ashe's husband, Rasler (Or Rassler, as the author calls him) is the real standout in the story, providing gems such as, "Who the fuck is you talking to in that tone!" and "WHAT!? YOU DONE AN AFFAIR!"
- The Modern Warfare 2 fanfic "The Beta Threat". The entire plot can be summarized as "Marty Stu protagonist kills a bunch of Card-Carrying Villain terrorists, goes to jail because he failed to save a single hostage, and is called back into action to kill more terrorists." The spelling is... unspeakable.
- The (extremely NSFW, now-removed) Pokémon Black and White fanfic "Bloody Love". The story features Burgh as a Yandere Serial Killer who's obsessed with forcing Grimsley to have sadomasochistic sex with him! Burgh suffers extreme Character Derailment while at the same time having his camp traits taken Up to Eleven to the point he sings just about every line he says and makes a (possibly unintentional) reference to Damn Yankees. Meanwhile Grimsley has become Too Dumb to Live and doesn't seem to have the faintest clue about how creepy Burgh is acting until it's too late. However, regulars in the Pokémon Black and White fandom may be impressed by how it's Burgh chasing Grimsley this way rather than the other way around!
- Bowser's Mexico Adventure, because while most Mario fan fiction falls under this category, this one stands a bit above them. After all, where else will you find in addition to Bowser (of the Wet variety, whatever that means), Boba Fett and C-3PO, Nedry, Aladdin, Mozenrath, Joel and the Bots and Bear Grylls? Possibly a Troll Fic, but still so bad it's good.
- Breakdown, a Persona 3 fanfic, has the cast dying in improbable ways, and Mitsuru coping by becoming a prostitute, then running into traffic and dying. If technically passable, the whole thing is pretty ridiculous and handled very poorly.
- If you weren't laughing throughout, the final line is a guaranteed LOL. Roxius in general is great for incomprehensible fics, and the confused/angry/scared reviewers.
- Superhadou's Crystal Man's Journey is a fanfic about the robot masters from Mega Man 5 going into the future to help X and Zero battle Mavericks and Sigma with Crystal Man as their leader. Though the grammar isn't awful, it contains awful puns, random songs and generally over the top fight scenes.
- Doom: The Unseen Version(NSFW). A badly written smutfic in which the people stationed in Mars get it on with the demons after all Hell breaks loose. You will never look at Doom the same way again... it makes Impse look tame.
- Ecco the Dolphin And the Swim Meet. It's only a hundred-something words long, so the plot doesn't make sense and is over before you know it. There's also numerous typos and jokes that make absolutely no sense. But all of these combine to be bizarrely entertaining. And then there's the ending.
- The Evil Alliance, written by cloudacsephac, is a Final Fantasy Mega Crossover that features impenetrable, pseudo-Faulknerian stream of consciousness prose. Cloud and Squall inexplicably team up (along with a Cloud-chasing Relationship Sue named Blaze) to take down the eponymous alliance of Sephiroth and Ultimecia. The author's tangled, incoherent prose, bizarre plotting and interminable fight scenes make this a must read. Good luck trying to figure out who's speaking at any given time.
- Amelia_nekomimi's (now named GARGOULES) "Fire Emblem: Ike's Journey" takes elements from both Blazing Blade, Sacred Stones and the Tellius games, adds some Mary-Sue and a bit of Self-Insert and mixes it all with a delicious dose of Peter Chimaera-level writing to create an epic tale of love, sacrifice, pink weapons from the future and magic rocket horses. It's filled with memorable quotes such as "I kill him with cuts and a catle fall on his head" and "ONLY MUCH WORST". While it seems to be a Troll Fic, from the fact that the author edited the title due to advice from a reader, it's very hard to tell. Even if you're not a Fire Emblem fan, you'll laugh at how ridiculous it all is.
- Hell Hath Fury, a Doom fanfiction featuring a Gary Stu protagonist. It contains every Doom fanfiction cliche. It's also overly long and badly written.
- Imp Encounter, an infamous Doom fanfic that satirizes sex fanfiction by having the Doom Guy, under the influence of a berserk pack, brutally rape and kill a female imp (The Goomba of the first Doom, arguably even easier than the zombies for an experienced player to kill). The story and the sex scene have become Memetic Mutation in the Doom community, with a tribute site named impse.cx, an infamous animated GIF◊, and even a cutscene level.
- ITS MY LIFE! for Portal. Marrissa Roberts, Chell's sister, is at first just living in the "portal labs" but then the fan fiction slowly turns into fighting villains of a greater and greater scale.
- "Laughter" is a Pokémon Diamond and Pearl fanfic that attempts to explain some things about Cyrus's past. The writing is competent and some of the ideas it raises are interesting, but the random, senseless gruesome torments inflicted on Cyrus come out of nowhere and the first and second chapters gel together so badly they might as well be two completely separate stories. The fic is laughable for its sheer Refuge in Audacity.
- Left 2 Die 4ever. The plot is pretty faithful and original at the same time considering it's Left 4 Dead.
- The Legund of Lik.(The original story is deleted, the link goes to a dramatic reading.) Link fights monsters from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and makes horrible puns. The writing is so atrocious that it's probably intentional. Do not read this in a library, because you will laugh. Hard.
- The story has now been reposted go here if you want to read it
- Lust Penis (obviously NSFW), an infamous MS Paint Star Fox fan comic. Fox McCloud gets transformed into a dinosaur sex slave by General Scales, who violates him anally and transforms him again into a gigantic, living penis, fusing him with an enormous statue, which then proceeds to anally violate another enormous statue. After creating a river of semen, Fox regains consciousness, reverts back to his former self, and agrees that even though the whole thing was just a plot by Scales to have sex with him, he'd still like to do it again sometime. For those who aren't easily offended, it's utterly hilarious in its total ineptitude and bizarre plot.
- "Mario Sex-ed." (Video might be NSFW depending on how your work place looks at it.) A video where Mario, who spouts food puns at every oppertunity, and Luigi, who is very much victim to Not Even Bothering with the Accent, tell someone about safe sex. With images from the Mario series and sounds effects from Sonic games to assist, as well as Stock Footage from Captain N: The Game Master. It's about as weird as it sounds, and it's hopefully satire and not someone's attempt at making an actual sex-ed video with Mario. Hopefully.
- Mega Man At Mc Donalds. Mega Man owes Dr. Light (presumably, because the author neglected to state whom he was talking to) $44,632.82 from buying diapers, so he gets a job at McDonald's. Mega Man is completely incompetent (he even says he is retarded), and later on, he gets slashed by a "tyrant from Resident Evil", and is beaten up by a generic bully. Everyone is out of character (especially Mega Man). The plot is weak, there are typos, and there are also several failed attempts at humor. There is also a blatant inconsistency; In Chapter 2, Mega Man shoots Johnny Sasaki, which means he is not bound by the Three Laws of Robotics, but in Chapter 3, he self-cites the First Law as the reason why he can't harm "Some The Bully".
- Due to several requests for the story to be updated, the story has just gotten a fifth chapter, featuring such things as Mega Man calling Alphonse Elric (of Fullmetal Alchemist) half-Gundam, Mega Man getting "assraped" by black British police, Elec Man stating that firing employees is against the law, and for some reason "Mega Man" is now being referred to as "Megaman".
- My Inner Life. Another one kicked off of the So Bad It's Horrible page for being hilariously bad instead of just plain bad. Nominally a fanfic of The Legend of Zelda, it's horribly written with the most blatant self-insertion Sue ever. In a situation similar to Sonichu, the writer is part of what makes it the phenomenon it is, and you must understand her to understand it. She goes out of her way to screech at anyone who might openly dislike the fic in her disclaimers for three pages if you cut-and-paste it into your word processor, and feels that Viewers Are Morons to the point of putting an incredible number of footnotes - almost as long as the "people who don't like my fic are evil" rants. Apparently, readers aren't bright enough to figure out what a "spring festival" is. Most of all, she's clearly dead serious about all the things that many suspect of being parody in My Immortal and the like. This is someone who has less ability to take criticism than Uwe Boll.
- Also, she's got a strange relationship with the 'return' key. Often, it's hard to tell who's talking because dialogue that really should have been another paragraph will be placed right next to the actions of someone else. But by this point, that's the 'jaywalking' in Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking.
- Night Blood Ties is an awkward World of Warcraft fanfic starring the characters of a single player and a couple of guildmates. The plot is literally dropped almost entirely in the subtitle of the fic and that's really the least of the story's problems. Characters routinely blend game terms and in-universe terms to the point where characters refer to large-scale military assaults on capitol cities as "routine". The author's main character constant dives into the spotlight, obscuring the characters relevant to the plot. The story is punctuated with the author pitching his Wo W guild and it's arguable the whole thing was an attempt at promotion via tie-in.
- It also has a character named Manthony. Yes, Manthony.
- Mass Effect fanfiction has Parallel Realities, which is probably the single silliest Alternate Universe Fic the continuum has given. Admittedly, the premise is interesting, but where the author takes the premise is so silly and incredibly stupid it gets really bad. And yet, there's something unabashed about its silliness and how obvious the Author Tract is that it's hard to hate it.
- Fan video: "Peach VS Daisy VS Zelda VS Rosalina." (Link here, possibly NSFW.) A little over a minute of blatant Author Appeal that comes across as Fetish Retardant, made funny by the sheer ammount of odd fighting styles and unnecessary cameltoes everywhere. And the winner is a seemingly genderbent Link... who blows up Zelda for some reason. Throw in some semi-unfitting dramatic music and you have yourself one hell of a video that managed to get over four million views.note
- Phoenix White: Justifications of Justice! is a Phoenix Wright fanfic involving Phoenix Wright taking over Mr. White's position as the president of Blue Corp, and ending up on trial after trying to resurrect Mia Fey. The concepts are absolutely laughable and ridiculous, but the icing on the cake is the ending where it's revealed that Phoenix Wright is actually a mouse, and the entire Phoenix Wright universe was something he imagined when he was eaten by a cat and went to heaven.
- The prince and the peasant written by Ranay is a Mega Man In-Name-Only fanfic which pairs her Self-Insert character, Ranay, with Top Man. The story takes place in Medieval times and supposedly all characters (and yes, including the robot masters) are humans. Not to mention Top Man transforms into a CAT BEAST. The fanfic alone contains large amounts of Canon Defilement, Plot Holes, Department of Redundancy Department, and research failure. It's only made more hilarious by Ranay's disregard for proper spelling, grammar, punctuation, and overall use of the English language.
- "In a kingdom where the laws were absolute, everything was going against these laws was to punish the destruction or death. In the same realm sometimes not even that was wrong was dismissed. But there was something different about this kingdom"
- "king is a farce"
- "Top stun all soldiers but forget to Rock"
- Quake Urgency, which almost kind of read like a rough draft of an aborted Quake I comic-book in the style of the Doom comic.
"Oh no zombie dogs!" said Quake Marine and he shoot the exploding barrels and they were explode taking the zombie spiders (which exploded)
- By the same author, Mortal Kombat: Combat of the Shrines.
- red dead john merston: the return and dislike, a Red Dead Redemption fanfic that manages to portray every character completely wrong, have some of the most terrible dialogue ever seen and a Title Drop that could make John Freeman himself wince. Notably, Man Without A Body did a Dramatic Reading of it, which can be found here.
- From the Touhou fandom comes Reimu fights the bad guys of adrkness by Talos Angel. It includes (among other things) rampant Rouge Angles of Satin ("Hell Reimu," Reimu fried Marisa sad, "Is god mourning!"), Marisa playing Half-Life 2, Pactouli and Marisa getting "nekked" and having "hot sox" on Reimu's couch, Marisa getting pregnant and having a baby, and a nonsensical plot where Reimu becomes a bad guy. The author admits that she wrote it while drunk, but it's still hilarious either way.
- There's a dramatic read of it here.
- Sephirothslave'sShinra High and its sequel, Shinra SOLDIER are probably the best known examples in Final Fantasy VII fandom. Proudly called "novels" by their authoress, they have a total of 170 chapters together, filled with nothing but inaccurate interpretations and wishfulfillment. Among many things, these fanfictions feature a goth Mary Sue and self insert of epic proportions, canon defilement, butchered character personalities, cliche love triangle, wangst, Beige Prose and clear research failure.
- ''Super Smash Sisters: Damsel to Hero'' is a laughably-convoluted mess of a fanfic. Essentially a combination of a lesbian Rule 34 fic and an Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, it takes on a strange pretentious aura by beginning its chapters with World War II-related quotes lifted from Call of Duty games. Futhermore, its narrative takes Loads and Loads of Characters Up to Eleven, with numerous spots in the text, some even intended as dialogue, where a truly huge inventory of characters is read off—and these exhaustive spots JUST KEEP REPEATING. They're all fighting against Nazis and other generic enemies from Call of Duty games.
- The Supper Smash Bros series is a pretty blatant Super Smash Bros. Troll Fic written by "PrincessAmerica". It is filled with Strawman Politicals, its protagonist is a 13-year-old Heteronormative Crusader Mary Sue sent to the Video Game World by God himself, pre-existing characterizations are outright ignored in favor of making certain characters "gays" and "lesbans" who want to "rap" people. Also, as you may have guessed, the spelling frequently veers into and beyond Rouge Angles of Satin (in fact, both the "Angle for Angel" and "Satin for Satan" examples are used more than once). It's a strong contender for the title of "My Immortal of the Super Smash Bros. fandom". A Wild Badfic Appeared! Commentaries riffed it as its first MST, and it didn't take long for the cast to break down into a mess of laughter, confusion, and/or pure snarkiness.
- Also of note is the "Political satire" story that PrincessAmerica wrote as herself, The Ethical Adventures of GamerGate. If one takes aside the initial brilliance of her scheme, this fic, while much, much more competently written, is like Mishonh from God content-wise but for the political far-left instead of the far-right. It's extremely Anvilicious, filled with angry, blatant, bitter raging against Strawman Politicals, oversimplification of sensitive political issues, Critical Research Failure, and even more Black and White Morality and Bias Steamroller regarding the far-left. And what probably makes it even more hilarious or cringeworthy, depending on one's tastes, is that this time, she's being completely serious. And keep in mind this woman is engaged and 30 years old.
- Tales of the Spageti Womna. Nominally a Metroid Crack Fic, it features such gems as as Ridley/Samus pairing, a crossover with YouTube Poop, and Captain Falcon's name being "misspelled" as things like "Caption Fallatio" [sic] and "Capetown Falcone". Almost like YouTube Poop in fanfic form.
- As well as this line: "OH MY GAWD!" THEY ALL EXCLAMD "NAHTANEL IS A HOMOSEXEXAUL!"
- Ties That Bind: A Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Story is a terrible, poorly written fanfiction about a Marty Stu insert who gets turned into a Pokemon. This series has only one chapter, full of switching tenses, OOC characters, and it reeks of unoriginality.
- Umineko: Memories of Umineko A bizarre Umineko fanfiction that contains a Mary Sue that is coincidentally named Umineko. Battler's in love with her, Beatrice kills him and he's alive because he's an apparition for some reason. This fic is filled with bad spelling and grammar, Ikea Erotica, a plot that doesn't make sense, an over the top Mary Sue and Villain Sue. It very well may be a troll fic.
- Wolfenstien comeback, a senseless Troll Fic in which the main character of Wolfenstein (referred to as Dr. Wolfenstein, even though Wolfenstein is the name of the castle) is trying to fight the "Natzees", then ends up in Rapture and is renamed "Bioshock", then he resurfaces and ends up in the world of Fallout for no reason. It has absolutely no story and makes no sense whatsoever, but it's freakin' hilarious.
- This video, made by seinfeldspitstain, is an obviously fake leak of the fourth Super Smash Bros. game made seemingly in an attempt at this trope. Between the crack newcomer choices, characters stuck in one pose, numerous animation distortion, random music cut at the end before Reggie's introduction, and general lack of making any sense, it does its job well and becomes completely hilarious.
- This Warcraft fanfiction. The only plausible explanation for the whole thing is that there's someone kidnapping major lore characters and giving them frontal lobotomies.
- There's Something About Halo is a very well-known and liked video on Newgrounds... the same can't be said for this utter mess that was obviously created to infuriate as much people as possible. It is quite possibly one of the worst videos on Newgrounds, not that it makes it any less hilarious.
- The Legend of Zelda: The Light of Courage. It started off as a script that has a few spelling errors, oditties like the Triforces talking, and most notably an Original Character who makes referential humor and sticks out of the cast like a sore thumb. It's a plan for a Zelda movie that actually has the line "Man, this guy has more mouth then Julia Roberts." It was remade into three short videos that try at this intentionally and do pretty well at it.
- A Homestuck fanfic, the creatively titled Homestuck high (sic), has been posted on FF.net. It's almost reminiscent of My Immortal in some ways. It starts out as a High School A.U. of Homestuck before quickly going into some bizarre plot about Sollux (who is a demon for some reason) trying to impregnate Rose and Jade and use them to give birth to demon spawn. The fan fic is very much In-Name-Only, in both Homestuck and in its title, as it's more of a supernatural story than a high school one. It makes no sense and names of canon characters are used for other people. (Aradia is some sort of genie that helps out John, Eridan is John's transformation in order to duel with the demon Sollux, etc.) It also involves John having a vision after possesed by dark magic from a McDonalds burger as an important plot point. And John had liked Rose ever since she... bit his arm and broke his glasses in the second grade. Probably a Troll Fic, but still hilariously terrible. Now has its own page.
- Another Homestuck example would be We're just different, the story of a blatant Mary Sue named Titaia who is sent to a "special school" due to a suicide attempt, where she meets unbelievably OOC versions of the trolls—most notably, Sollux and Karkat, as opposed to being Jerks With Hearts Of Gold as they are in canon, are portrayed as merciless bullies. Titaia is tricked (by Tavros, of all people!) into I Ming Sollux and falls for him. The whole thing is so ridiculously OOC and Narmtastic that it becomes utterly hilarious (though it could be triggering to bullying victims nonetheless), and unlike Homestuck high, it seems completely sincere.
- Learning And Sburbing is infamous on the Homestuck Reddit for its so-bad-it's-good appeal. Some refer to it as the My Immortal of Homestuck.
- Obscurus Lupa Wins The Olympics, a clear parody where Obscurus Lupa wins the Olympics in the first few sentences, and proceeds to kill an Eldritch Abomination at the center of the universe, punch the Devil, and go on a date with a Parody Sue.
- The Fanfic Maker generates these kinds of fanfics.
- Every Badfic You Will Ever Read invokes this by using every bad fanfiction cliche in the book.
- Beauty and the Faunus is a fanmade remake of Disney's Beauty and the Beast which has Blake as the Beast, Weiss is Belle, Cinder is Gaston, Emerald is Le Fou, and Mercury, Roman and Neo, who speaks for some reason, as the three blondes always lusting over Gaston. Oh yeah, and Ruby Rose, the fourteen year old girl known for being a fun loving girl who likes making friends, takes on the role of Cogsworth. It manages to fail very hard at being an actual remake, instead coming off as uncreative and dull, but hilariously so. The author writes it in script form, plagiarizes the original Beauty and the Beast film to such an extent all the characters pretty much have been given the personalities of other characters, resulting in all of them becoming victims of Character Derailment.
- Aerial Choreography is not only the first Steven Universe fanfic to hit fanfiction.net, but also the first Steven Universe Crack Fic. (The show hadn't premiered yet at the time the fanfic was published.) The plot revolves around Steven and Amethyst confessing their feelings for one another before joining the Mile-High Club and starting a forest fire below them. It also leads to Amethyst becoming pregnant. Oh, boy, we're in for a treat.
- Steven and Amethyst: The Love That Transcends The Doors of Inanity makes the above seem logical. The dialogue is pretentious, the "erotic scenes" include gross depictions of bodily fluids, and the whole thing ends with Steven and Amethyst being digested by their combined stomach juices, Pearl and Garnet joining them out of grief, and Greg burying them in the toilet. Also, one of the characters is Commissioner Gordon for no reason.
- Attack of the Giant Suki. The title alone probably secures it a spot on this page. Suki gets huge, Ba Sing Se freaks out, and the villain is the Cabbage Merchant. And adding to the WTF-ness, for whatever indeterminable reason, it briefly switches to script format about halfway through each chapter. All intentional.
- Bart The General. It's hilarious... for all the wrong reasons.
- ED of the World by Steve. The Eds and the kids go to the carnival, which turns out to suck eggs. When they watch trained chihuahuas perform, one of them bites Jimmy, while another destroys Plank. And when the fireworks set off, the kids start bleeding from airborne glass shards. The carnival turns out to be a trap by Jimmy von Diablo, and the kids run away before von Diablo blows up the place. The End.
- The Gravity Falls fanfic series 'Gettysbur6 Island' is an impressive abomination of Stylistic Suck, filled to the brim with horrible grammar, misspelled words and names (including Satan instead of Stan), and ridiculous plots that would make a nice one-shot crackfic seem like Tolstoy. There is an entire chapter about borscht. Advance at your own risk.
- im nut ok i Promiss. What starts out as an obvious My Immortal meets My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic trollfic, goes to extremely odd levels in later chapters.
- Korra in the Hood. Possibly the first Legend of Korra Crack Fic to ever grace fanfiction.net, written nearly a month before the show premiered. It has everything a crackfic could ever need: Korra and Naga being raped in the first chapter, a threesome between Korra, Bolin and Mako, Tenzin as an insane fart fetishist, a mecha fight between Zutarians and Equalists and Amon revealing who he really is. The author even calls one of the chapters the obligatory beach episode.
- Lisa is Pregnant. Bart freezes to death while using the "last resort" to keep him and Lisa warm while they're both trapped on an icy mountain. The title indicates what this leads to. Also, the, er, writing style itself is... pretty interesting.
- Because women are have recessive parts. Now you know.
- "You awake. Bart is d'oh."
- My Innocence. The title alone has convinced people that it's a My Immortal-inspired Troll Fic, but it's hard to tell for sure because there aren't enough similarities between the fanfics. Still worth a read, if only to see the narrator insult lesbians and then apologize for his "pre-juice." Watch out for racism, sexual themes, and mind-searing idiocy.
- My Little Pony: The Final Adventure. Cheap MS Paint-quality drawings, backgrounds clearly taken off of the internet, unenthusiastic voice acting, yet so much Narm and Big Lipped Alligator Moments that there's no reason not to like it.
- The same Youtuber also made one for Sonic The Hedgehog.
- The Secreat Lives of the Ooo and Aaa teens [sic] is an Adventure Time fanfic that has every character falling in love with a genderbent in the most ridiculous and OOC way possible, then getting pregnant, all while every other word is misspelled. The whole premise of the fic is what deserves it be here.
- The fanfic has been taken down, but a repost correcting the title is available here. Roughly, the first chapter is: Marshall Lee, after meeting Finn and Fionna together (and teasing them), goes to Prince Gumball's castle, who has Princess Bubblegum as an invited guest. Marshall and Bubblegum hang out and, after Marshall seduces her with a 'Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs' song (really, and it's written in a very inexperienced manner), they go to Marshall's house to have sex. Yes, they have sex. And they have just met.
- SECRET LOVERS is a The Secret Show fanfic written by Agent Matt that focuses on three pairings, mainly the One True Pairing Victor and Anita, engaging in kissing and (presumably) intercourse. And this is accomplished while every other word is misspelled.
- The Simpsons Movie Remake by "grapestr33t4life" teeters precisely on the line between this and So Bad, It's Horrible. OOC, excessive profanity (almost four hundred uses of fuck in dialogue alone), horrible spelling and grammar, nonsensical plot points abound, extremely blatant Author Appeal that eventually kills what little resemblance to the movie it had, an author who claims to be a crip and lets it show, who Can't Take Criticism... and that's not even getting to the songs. Also, Homer falls in love with Kumatora (a young teenager)
- SnatchEd a Jewel by TV John. An Ed Eddn Eddy fanfic (featuring the Red Guy), has references to The Emperor's New Groove and The Fairly OddParents!, and even has Jackie Chan as a guest star (they even call him a guest star in the fic). The only thing bad about it is the writing, but there is this hilarious exchange:
Eddy: hey my parents aren't here I kick @$$Edd: hey you stole the jewelEddy: hey the officers asleep I kick @$$Edd: STOP SAYING THAT!!!!Ed: hey where did you get the jewelEdd: he stole itEddy: yep when the officers asleep I kick @$$Edd: you said that alreadyEddy: oh yeah
- Here is a summary of the fic: Eddy finds a huge jewel and steals it, somehow leading to Ed and Edd to take the blame. While the two are arrested, Eddy tries to play dodgeball with Jimmy but accidently kills him. Then Eddy goes back to his house to find it being destroyed by the jewel, getting it replaced by "house held nunchucks". After going to bed and Jackie Chan asking to read him a story, Eddy wakes up to find Sarah. She gets mad at Eddy for killing Jimmy and beats Eddy up untill he confesses that he stole the jewel and then bails Ed and Edd out, but not before the Red Guy puts a spell on Eddy giving him a boil twice the size of the jewel. (The jewel destroyed his house). Yeah.
- The Spiderses. The concept and story are stupid, but the prose is deliberately and hilariously terrible
- Urban Eds by Yunaman. The plot involves the Eds as teenagers going to a night club, where Nazz works as a prostitute. It has Costume Porn, Johnny as a bouncer on steroids raping Eddy, Eddy drinking a drug cocktail called "The Blue Cauchemar" with predictable results and ends with Nazz castrating Double Dee for no reason. Still the combination of weird subject matter, uncomfortably straightforward plot, the choice of words and occasional spelling and grammar mistakes definitely makes this fic quallify as So Bad It's Good.
- William Country. An otherwise decent Total Drama Island fan video that has several bizarre sequences with no relation to the plot, such as Cody smoking or two beavers eating everybody before humping with a rap-ish song playing in the background. Also of note, the main plot is about a romance between Cody and an OC who looks almost exactly like him, giving wierd Self Cest vibes. The "sleep" sequences don't help much either. Did we also mention that it's an actual, full-length movie at around 90 minutes? The unfortunate thing about this film is that it is very difficult to find, due to it usually only being uploaded in anacronic parts, and the videos being taken down several times.
- Here is a (NSFW) Thomas the Tank Engine Lemon Fic. You read that right. TRAINS (specifically Thomas and Rosey) HAVING SEX. How is this acomplished? Aparently steam valves are exactly the same as genitalia. Making it even worse, is the fact that the author treated it 100% seriously, and used gushy romantic language to describe something that's anything but.
- Is one story about two TRAIN ENGINES HAVING SEX not enough for you? Don't Worry! The same author wrote three more.
- And EVEN MORE examples of trains getting it on! This time between Gordon and Thomas.
- Summary by the author: "Poop Poop! Today's the day of the Sodor parade! Thomas can't wait to take the children for a ride! What adventures await him today? Rated M for language, mass kidnapping, violent homosexual train rape and the murder of innocent children. Must be read in Ringo Starr's voice."
- This little bit of My Little Pony, ahem, eroticism. It's hard to figure out whether or not it's a Stealth Parody, although the random Rocky Horror reference does raise eyebrows...
- The King Of The Hill Episode 1 Peggys Revenge is a King of the Hill fanfiction that starts off with Peggy and Hank eating at a French restaurant. Then it changes to Peggy, Lucky and John planning her revenge over Hank's weak sex drive. How does she achieve this? By abusing Hank and then uploading it on YouTube, and this is treated as hilarious. Here's the dramatic reading.
- Donkey, Please is just...bizarre. Shrek cheats on Fiona with Donkey, Lord Farquaad (alternatively "Fukwaad") is a Armored Closet Gay Heteronormative Crusader that throws everyone in a gay prison, and surprise appearances from Hatsune Miku, Snoop Dogg, and Juni Cortez. We dare you to get the image of Donkey in a sheer red dress and lingerie out of your head.
- Hopeles Harts is a short, yet bizarre Ed, Edd n Eddy Crack Fic starring Misty, a Perky Goth, who moves next to the Eds' house with her preppy and abusive mother. To sum the plot up shortly - Immediately after moving in, the also gothic Edd (or as he's called here, Dobel Pee) falls in love with her, followed by a gratuitous singing of JUN's "True Love", Misty being kidnapped by "the skanks", finding her way out by SINGING, the skanks running away, and a loud party. Mix it in with poorly-written grammar and a good bit of Freudian Slip, and you've got yourself a wonder on your hands. Here's a dramatic reading of it.
- Many things mentioned on Masterpiece Fanfic Theater.
- Most of the stories that get posted on Weepingcock qualify, though not all are technically fanfiction. Special mention, however, goes to this one, which is reminiscent of My Immortal.
- This story here What Should Have Happened, which has the author inventing words that don't exist, like "likey" as in "don't likey, don't ready," horrible misspelled dialogue and huge cases of OOC. It's one of the many badly written stories by this author. You might need Brain Bleach when you read it.