Chuck: All I ask is that you be consistent with your bullshit!
Similarly criticises when this happens in Torchwood: Miracle Day, as the first four episodes featured people alive and conscious despite being reduced to severed heads, yet the very next episode has those same people being knocked out without much difficulty.
The Main Characters Do Everything: He points this trope out often, especially given that Star Trek uses it so frequently, with Enterprise taking it to the extreme of having no B cast for the first two years, and only three recurring characters.
Chuck: Anyway, since Picard is concerned about [the three people from the 1980's] making trouble, naturally he does nothing to ensure that they stay out of trouble, because he keeps assigning important people to look after them and then calling them away - instead of someone less important to be charged with managing them. With over a thousand people on board you'd think there would be someone in charge of dealing with VIPs... but no.
Chuck: Meanwhile, all the senior officers of the station have crammed themselves into one tiny little Runabout, after pissing off the Klingons, the Cardassians and the Dominion. Surprisingly, someone actually gets the idea into their head that this would make a convenient target. [...] They try an emergency beam-out, but the explosion blows out the transporter, leaving Eddington now in command.
Chuck: "Paradise opens with the kind of silliness we're often prone to seeing in Trek: People doing stuff that by all rights should be done by somebody else, purely as an excuse to get to the plot. In this case, Sisko and O'Brien are scouting planets for colonization, rather than running the station and making sure said station is still running, respectively."
Chuck: So Tom Paris not only flies the ship, the most important shuttle missions, is the field-medic-slash-assistant-to-the-doctor, has 24th century lockpicking ability... he's also a commando. Oh, and let's not forget he once designed an engine that went to infinity.
[Later in the same review...]
Chuck: Since this is an important engineering matter, it's quickly handed off to Harry to take care of, instead of one of the actual engineers.
[Still in the same review, this time regarding a multi-purpose villain]
Chuck: Because this is a television show, Augris will be the face of these people in all situations: whether communicating to off-world aliens, performing interrogations, or searching the streets for criminals. What a micro-manager.
Chuck: ... With all the radiation, they have to move in close to beam them out, but Harry is working to beam through it, since he's the Transporter Chief and all that. Or, actually, NOT, but why leave it in the hands of a specialist when you can assign it to the guy who never held that position in his life?
Chuck: "... and that way Tom can beam them out. Yes, Tom. Have there been so many casualties in the transporter room that there are no transporter chiefs left? Harry, Torres, and now the guy busy piloting the ship... Does the transporter chief exist solely to be shot by the bad guys?"
In "Shattered" (VOY) he points out a scene from the episode where Ensign Harry Kim is in command of the ship - despite obviously still not being trusted enough to be promoted to at least Lieutenant Jr. Grade.
Chuck: Meanwhile Archer pilots a shuttlepod down, with Reed alongside him. At this point it means that Hoshi is in command - who is terrified of Enterprise and all of its contents.
[Later in the same review...]
Chuck: The transporter is new technology, just approved for use on human-beings in the last two months, and is designed to break them down and put them back together again. This is all done by highly-trained experts, who know how to handle this thing precisely, to avoid any problems... and who are all apparently on a coffee break, because we see Reed down there instead. After all, he's already the tactical officer, security officer, deliverer of weather reports, and the guy who rides shotgun whenever Archer takes the shuttlepod out, so why shouldn't he operate the transporter too? I mean, how hard can it be? [Cue horrific transporter accident]
Archer seems to have demoted Hoshi to be the Enterprise's delivery girl for the jobs that the others can't be arsed to do. Moments after launching a Subspace Communications Amplifier, which needed to be checked was working properly so that Enterprise could maintain their link to Earth, he asked Hoshi to find out Reed's favourite food for his birthday, choosing her over any other random crewman, and told her to make it her top priority. It's not as though Hoshi is the damned Communications Officer!
Chuck: Is there a medication for what you're on, Archer?
Likewise, in "Regeneration", Hoshi has been demoted once again, and is now in charge of delivering food to Dr Phlox. Phlox then asks for her to look after his menagerie of critters, effectively demoting her to the role of Ship's Zookeeper.
Chuck: [Dr. Marcus wants the Reliant to check whether they can move some inanimate pre-life-forms off Ceti Alpha 6]... But that requires going down there to check. And no matter what the era, it's always the job to send down the two senior-most officers for simple reconnaissance.
Chuck: "Sybok places [Kirk] back in command, so he decides to do it by the book: namely, that when going into a potentially dangerous planet, you send the captain, first officer, chief medical officer, and the nearest available religious nut down for reconnaissance."
Shows up also in Stargate SG-1, where he laments the budgetary restraints the show has means SG teams are never accompanied by airmen or mooks. That it is only the most important, highest ranking members who do everything.
Chuck practically name-checks this trope (as "Main Crew Does Everything") in "Minefield" (ENT), an episode which contains two glaring examples of the trope: The fact that Phlox is the only one with medical training on board, and the fact that Archer is the one who goes out on the hull to help Reed and dismantle a nuclear bomb. He goes on to point out how easy it would have been to justify the use of the trope in the second case, while simultaneously giving Archer some much-needed character development.
Mandatory Line: He'll usually point these out as they happen, often sarcastically remarking that the events at hand have so moved Harry or Chakotay that they even deliver a line!
Mask of Sanity: "Fury" opened on Janeway quoting a passage from Catch-22 while glaring at the deadness of space, only to switch to a friendly Minnesota accent when a crewman enters the ready room.
Mean Character, Nice Actor: A variant; "Lousy Character, Good Actor." Chuck has repeatedly pointed out he appreciates almost everyone in Voyager as actors, even Ethan Philips, who plays Neelix. He just hates the character that Philips has to play. Similar to how most people differentiate between the in-universe Creators Pet Wesley and Wil Wheaton. ("Acquisition", "Jetrel")
Picard's denunciation of Starfleet for relocating a couple hundred colonists ("How many people does it take before it becomes wrong? A THOUSAND? A MILLION???") kinda falls flat when you realize how many billions he's indirectly killed by denying them revolutionary medicine. Chuck concludes that Picard might want to ask that same question of himself.
Made even worse with an example provided by Chuck: The Federation treaty with the Cardassians. Federation colonies are now in Cardassian space and their residents are taking up arms to defend their homes (The Maquis). Despite the Cardassians flouting the treaty openly, Picard continues to defend and enforce it, making him partially responsible for those deaths. "How many colonists does it take before it becomes wrong?"
Still fuming over "Dear Doctor", in which Archer asserts that curing an alien epidemic is akin to meddling with their evolutionary path ("We didn't come out here to play God!"). Flash-forward to "A Night In Sickbay", in which Archer demands that Phlox invent a new medical procedure to...save his beagle.
Chuck: You have no idea what the consequences will be for this new procedure, do you? You didn't come out here to play God. Maybe you should just let nature take its course...CAPTAIN.
Medal of Dishonor: Hoshi's cowardice is world-reknowned even a century later, as Kirk presents a redshirt with the "Hoshi Sato Cowering Chicken medal, with clusters." ("Space Seed")
Harry Kim, winner of Starfleet's Metrosexual Award for three years running. ("Prime Factors")
Most of Chuck's end-of-episode "prizes" could count as these, particularly the awards for annoying character and space genocide.
"Bitch, you think that's it? The list of ways I'm awesome is so long, the only surface large enough to write 'em on is my dick!"
Not to mention...
"Shran's just lucky Sisko's not here. If he tried calling him Brownskin he'd bitch slap him so hard he'd make Weyoun'd feel dizzy"
When talking about Picard's love of horseback riding, and how it showcases his "Officer and a Gentleman" style compared to Sisko's more "Line Officer" style:
''...while Sisko is probably content to ride on a Tyranosaurus."
Sisko fighting Jem'Hadars:
"(A Jem'Hadar) manages to disarm Sisko, unaware that this puts him in reach of the mighty Sisko fist. Given the chance to punch someone, Sisko takes it. Then shoots a few more Jem'Hadar, before just beating some with his gun. Sadly, even Sisko can take on only 15 or so genetically engineered Supersoldiers, before even he gets overwhelmed."
Sisko designing Starfleet's most advanced warship and name it the "Defiant" JUST so that one day he might get his chance at revenge with the Borg. And according to Chuck, the reason why Sisko wasn't in Star Trek First Contact was that the Borg knew of his awesomeness and waited until he was preoccupied on the other side of federation space before attacking.
Arguably the best example of Chuck's take on Sisko is presented during the Dominion War when Sisko takes his single ship into the wormhole and faces down a fleet of thousands of ships.
"I don't expect to take down more than half of them but maybe we'll get lucky."
And, above all, Captain James Tiberius Kirk himself. When reviewing "Trials and Tribble-ations", he notes that Sisko thinks so highly of him, and since Sisko is a man's man, that makes Kirk a man's man's man. It's also obvious that Chuck thinks very highly of him too - whenever he's given the chance, he'll gush about all of Kirk's accomplishments, canonical and memetic alike.
"Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be on the bridge coming up with new ways of being awesome our scientists haven't even thought of yet."
Inverted with Picard, when it comes to fights ("Not in the face!"), but played straight when it comes to his speeches (even the sanctimonious ones).
In his reupload of "Basics", suggests the real reason Voyager became The Dreaded throughout the Delta Quadrant was because word got around about Tom Paris, leaving everyone terrified that someone so accomplished could only be a Lieutenant! A Junior Grade Lieutenant!
"They say that the Captain raids Borg Cubes just to alleviate her boredom!"
Not just Sisko in DS9. From the "The Maquis, Part II" review:
"Fish-face has no choice but to comply. With these two [Sisko and Dukat], Miles O'Brien and Kira "I can kill you with a well-placed swear word" Nerys, there's enough metric badass to tear down their shields with a strong glare."
Misery Builds Character: Admiral Janeway was a big proponent of this trope, putting Janeway and her sister through torturous Death Traps as children. But it was all worth it to produce Starfleet's most balanced, by-the-book, and sexually regular Captain!
Chuck savages "Real Life"'s use of this trope, pointing out that if real humans had the power to prevent or avoid misery they'd do it every time.
Due to his similar experience with the premature birth of his twin sons, where for a time they weren't sure if they would survive, (thankfully both did), this episode's repeated insistence of this trope really pushes his Berserk Button.
At the end of his review of "Once More Into the Breach", Chuck gives a touching valediction to the character of Kor, musing over his status as a legend both inside and outside the Star Trek universe. Then, as he finishes and the Klingons who are singing in Kor's honor launch into the chorus of their song, Chuck chimes in . . . with the yodel from the Ricola cough drop ads.
"Come gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all the unkindness, but alas, haters gonna hate."
Moon Landing Hoax: One of his put-upon characters claims that the moon landing was faked—on the moon. "That's why it looks so real!"
Moral Dissonance: Save for the Strawman Has a Point trope, this particular provides Chuck the majority of his Snark Bait. It's not all fun and games, however, sometimes he offers some genuine heartfelt criticism of the moral lapses in judgments of characters. See the 'case for genocide against Archer and Phlox' rant on his website for more details.
He hates all "The Prime Directive says we should leave these people to die," episodes with a passion. The reason he hates Dear Doctor the most is because the characters never try to find a way around, despite it not even existing yet. The only consolation that he takes is that given Phlox's repeated blunders with regard to immunology and genetic compatibility, the cure he came up with was probably a dud.
He brings up the hypocrisy and stupidity of the plot of "Insurrection," where Picard refusing to move six hundred people on the grounds of "How many lives must we ruin before it becomes wrong" is treated as the right thing to do... when the potential benefits of this medicine could save billions.
Moral Event Horizoninvoked: Invokes this more than once regarding a villain's actions. Notably praised Nero's in the 2009 Star Trek, saying that while he didn't feel Nero was a very strong character, he did feel that the action of destroying Vulcan did do a good job of having him commit an act that would have the viewer want to see him defeating, since just destroying some random throwaway planet would not have had much effect.
The Mountains of Illinois: Carpenter Street. Captain Archer and T'pol are sent to Detroit to foil a Xindi plot. As the end credits play, the sun rises on the "beautiful mountains of Detroit".
Mr. Fanservice: In the review of "Duane Barry" of The X-Files, he points out the scene where Krycek picks up Mulder in his tiny red speedos. There, finally something for the ladies, and never say Chuck only shows tits on his show.
Also mentions that Garratt Wang was saved from being ejected from Voyager in Scorpion due to being put on a list of America's Sexiest Men by a magazine.
"It's uh, Brannon. We've worked together for nine years I..thought you'd have remembered that."
Kirk demoting Captain "Dicker" back down to XO and stealing his ship, just so the little prick learns his place.
"Sorry, Dicker, shit rolls downhill."
MST3K Mantra: Chuck completely deconstructs this trope a new one in-universe in the preface towards his "Threshold" Voyager review. While he doesn't outright discredit the mantra (using the "nuke the fridge" scene from Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull as an example of when you shouldn't let one moment of stupidity ruin an otherwise enjoyable piece), he points to the "it's just fiction, so there's no point in giving a damn about whether any of it makes sense" attitude of both the Star Trek producers and a certain segment of fans as a major reason as to why the franchise's popularity plummeted during the Voyager and Enterprise era.
Muggles Do It Better: Constantly laments that energy weapons fail to do what a good old fashioned rifle could do. Subverted in the Enterprise episode Terra Nova, when Plot Armor proves to work just as well with bullets as it does with phasers.
Musical Gag: Used to great effect, including everything from short musical snippets to full-blown parody songs.
Chuck has trouble trying to figure out why the Klingons' theme from Star Trek III is so familiar. Later he discovers that it's Underdog's theme song.
70's Disco music accompanies Dr. "Grizzly Adams" McCoy's appearance at the start of The Motion Picture to emphasize how dated that scene looks today.
Whenever the word "Genesis" is mentioned or relevant, there's a high likelihood that you're about to hear "Invisible Touch" by Genesis.
A musical interlude during Star Trek: The Motion Picture, with Chuck singing "Here's some stuff! Lets look at stuff!" in harmony with himself, to emphasize how empty and drawn-out the movie's special effects scenes are.
The intro for Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home consists of Kirk describing how primitive and paranoid the 1980s were, which Chuck quickly follows-up with Toni Basil's contemporary song Hey Mickey.
Later in the same review, the same issue is brought up and followed by One Night in Bangkok.
The Mortal Kombat theme kicks in during Kirk's knuckle fight with Sybok.
NOOB SYBOK WINS
Yakety Sax is used in "Brothers" (TNG) during the scene where Data manages to evade the ship's entire security team while heading down to the transporter room.
Riker hallucinating to the tune of "Donuts, Go Nuts!" in "Shades of Gray" (TNG).
Chuck gives a summary of the entire plot of "Genesis" (TNG) in the form of a song. It consists of eight very short lines.
Chuck: The crew is de-evolving / DARK CORRIDORS! / This guy thinks he's an ape-man / DARK CORRIDORS! / They're changing into animals / And that will be their doom / Oh, and here is Picard and Data / In yet another dark room.
A song by Chuck to recap the backstory for Star Trek: Generations, sung to the tune of the Wilhelm Tell Overture.
Oh, Kirk and his crew left the show So Enterprise-D could boldly go Picard then said "make it so" And shit killed Yar with just one blow
Picard getting Kicked Upstairs to go comet-hunting in First Contact. In keeping with the theme of Starfleet volunteering its scientists to go fight Borg, the general feeling aboard the ship is euphoria.
*Cut to the comet from VOY's credit sequence* Enrique Iglesias: I CAN BE YOUR HEEEEEROOOOOOOO... ♫
Chuck: A Klingon man is a soaring soul / As free as a charging targ / With an energetic yell, he is ready to compel / A bad guy to yell "Arrgh!" / His nose should pimple and his lips should scowl / His ridges gleam, and his odor foul / His boobs are firm, and his hair should grow / And his phaser ever ready for a knockdown blow! [Worf uses his phaser to smack a drone].
The song from the Blue Oyster Bar in Police Academynote (It is called "El Bimbo") is used in more than one episode to accompany mentions of gay bars (as in "Wolf in the Fold") or flamboyant activity (as in Insurrection).
"Cotton Eye Joe" is used to draw a direct comparison between the ridiculousness of Picard's gratuitous car chase scene in Star Trek: Nemesis and Kirk's gratuitous car chase scene in Star Trek (2009).
The theme from Oblivion replacing the intro music for Star Trek: Nemesis, while Chuck paraphrases the speech given by Patrick Stewart in that game's intro.
From "Barge of the Dead" (VOY): Our glimpse into the dishonorable Klingon "Hell" of Gre'Tor: Oblivion NPCs river dancing to Funny Fux's "Inline Skates". Apparently this was the least manly thing that came to mind.
Banjo music accompanies Voyager's destroying the array that would strand them in the Delta Quadrant.
An entire video, called "The Tuvix Coda", is dedicated to Janeway's experiences with mad science (performed on her own crew) accompanied by "Still Alive", the end-credits song from Portal. It fits perfectly.
Another, earlier video was a montage of Darth Vader's exploits, accompanied by "Major Tom".
Says that with all the cast asleep in "One" (from Voyager), the show has become about the adventures of the plucky hero and her hologram sidekick. Cue the Red Dwarf theme song...note (for those who don't know, the show Red Dwarf had, as two of its main characters, a human and a hologram.)
Chuck's not imagining things. There are two plausible explanations for why Past and Future Janeway don't get along. Either Janeway can't stand the shrill sound of her own voice, or... *cue Divinyls* ("Deadlock")
One of the earliest examples occurs in the review of "Phage" (VOY), where Voyager first encounters the Vidiians. In Chuck's intro, Janeway is seen letting the Vidiians off with a just a warning - followed immediately by a sort of Musical Slapstick Montage showing the many times Voyager was subsequently assaulted by Vidiians thanks to that face-palming decision. It is accompanied with "Lollipop" by the Chordettes.
In the "Parallax" (VOY) review, a montage of scenes where Janeway is posed higher than whomever she's talking with, accompanied by Alphaville's "Big in Japan".
Later in the same episode, Chuck's rendition of the pirate shanty "Blow the Man Down", with episode-relevant lyrics.
Chuck: "Janeway alone with Torres on the shuttle means bonding, soul-searching... ... Yo-ho, wedge the crack open! / They come back but find that there's two ships there now, / Uh-oh, looks like they're screwwwwd."
During "Threshold" (VOY), Chuck tries to understand what Paris means by "Multi-spectral subspace engine design", and he concludes that the Delta Flier might be powered by rainbows. Cut to a montage of Tom and Harry working on the Delta Flier, with rainbow colors everywhere, accompanied by ABBA's "Dancing Queen".
Chuck: Hi ho! Hi ho! I'm Chakotay, you all know! I'm dressed like this 'cause I'm Janeway's bitch, hi ho! Hi ho!
When discussing the Cybermen in "The Wheel In Space", Chuck asserts that the Cybermen have had their vocalizers hooked up to their backs, because they keep rocking back and forth while they talk. He posits that perhaps their lava-lamp-shaped controls make them want to break out in dance. He then overdubs a few shots of them with Haddaway's "What Is Love", which fits perfectly.
In "The Invasion" (WHO), Chuck asserts that Brigadier Lethbridge Stewart would've made a much better Major General than his superior, Rutledge, which prompts Chuck to sing a version of Gilbert and Sullivan's "Modern Major General" adapted for Stewart's character.
A montage of the physical abuse taken by Gollum during The Two Towers is accompanied by Chumbawamba's "Tubthumping" ("I get knocked down / but I get up again / you're never gonna keep me down").
Name's the Same: In "The Doomsday Machine", Chuck muses over whether Crewman Montgomery's first name is "Scott." That would sure be confusing.
In Wrath of Khan, he likens Joachim to Khan's Starbuck, then admonishes his audience for not reading.
(shows Katee Sackoff) Chuck: "...No, not that Starbuck." (shows Dirk Benedict) Chuck: "No, not that one, either." (shows latte) Chuck: "AW, C'MON!"
Narm: Too many specific (in-universe) examples to list, but he makes a blanket statement in his review of "Phage". "That's pretty much Voyager in a nutshell: drama provokes laughter."
"Daleks in Manhatan", best summed up as Incrazulicious.
As for "Evolution of the Daleks", that's ridicudumb.
"Let He Who is Without Sin":
Quark: I have seen drier days on Ferenginar, and we have 178 different words for rain! Right now, it's "glemmening" out there. Chuck: Yeah, and I have 412 words that describe bad Trek episodes, and right now this one is "suck-bominable ass-slop".
In part 5 of the "Miracle Day" review (Torchwood), we get "fiasco-tastro-fuck", describing the concentration camps set up to house and incinerate the not-quite-dead people.
Nepotism: Jokes that the only reason Picard tolerates Wesley is because he wants to get into Beverley's pants.
"You can spend years of studying to be experts in your field, in the hope that one day maybe you too can have the joy of needing to answer to some teenager who failed the Academy entrance exam, but who happens to be the son of a woman the Captain wants to ride bare-back."
Never Live It Down: In-universe, Troi crashing the Enterprise-D makes her the butt of many jokes.
B'Elanna takes no end of razzing for her failure, despite the assistance a tricorder, to identify manure on the old truck from '"The 37s".
Never Work with Children or Animals: Chuck mentions the trope by name and then commends The Thing (1982) on how the dog which escaped from the Norwegian camp acts, as it is first shown wandering the American camp with methodical curiosity, and shortly afterwards watches the humans with interest.
Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: In "Before and After" notes that Doctor Van Gogh, the future iteration of Voyager's Doctor, developed a radical new procedure to extend Kes' life so she could have a few more years with her husband Tom, her daughter Linnis, and her grandson Andrew. In doing so, he accidentally caused her to Mental Time Travel into the past, undoing the best years of her life, half of the people she loves to be erased from history, and the man she loves into the arms of another woman (Torres).
An almighty instance of this is pointed out in the review of "Fight or Flight," as a result of Archer getting pissy at T'Pol and insisting on going back to a ship whose occupants have been killed by a highly advanced race who siphon chemicals from their victims. Enterprise gets disabled by a ship from the race in question, and they have to be saved by another ship from the dead crew's race. It's noted that if not for the other ship showing up in time and Hoshi managing to work out their language on the fly, in the best case Archer would have gotten his crew killed, and in the worst case his actions would have led to Earth being conquered by hostile aliens, and the human race being reduced to cattle and slaughtered en masse for their chemicals.
His (rather plausible) theory that the Breen and the Pakleds are the direct result of Doctor Phlox and Archer committing genocide in "Dear Doctor".
In Threshold, everything the team does ends up going horribly wrong. One of the best examples is their plan to round up one of the seven escaped Infectees by beaming out the signal that mutated him. After they succeed in recapturing him, they go outside to discover dozens of random civilians showing up who've been exposed thanks to them.
In his review of Mass Effect 2, nearly everything Shiva Shepard does, intentional or otherwise, usually ends up leading to a massive body count following in her wake.
In "A Matter of Time", Picard decides to sentence a 22nd Century con-man to spend the rest of his life in prison, whilst trapped in the 24th Century! Except, Picard completely ignores the Temporal Prime Directive and the possibility that his disappearance from history might have caused some changes in the past two hundred years. Not to mention just letting the 26th Century Time Pod he was using return unpiloted back to the 22nd Century; joking that it probably ended up in New Jersey and in the possession of Tony Soprano's disembodied Brain in a Jar.
No, Except Yes: "It's my opinion that Brannon Braga isn't a bad writer so much as a hack one."
Noble Savage: Often takes Michael Piller to task for his portrayal of Native Americans and other indigenous cultures as always being completely peaceful, englighted and mystical individuals, who can heal the Earth with the power of prayer. Chuck points out that just because they don't have technology, history has repeatedly proven that native cultures can be just as brutal to each other as their more "civilized" counterparts.
Chuck points out how suicidal it is to disarm just because Chakotay insists that the native population of a planet are peaceful, despite being nothing but hostile until that point! However, if it's a Michael Piller script, Chakotay is always proven correct!
In "Tattoo", the "White Men from Outer Space" that supposedly uplifted the Native Americans for sharing the same veneration of the land as them. In addition to how racist this comes across as, he tears apart this Informed Attribute, since they keep summoning powerful storms that have the side-effect of kicking nature's ass?!
Non-Uniform Uniform: Points out Star Fleet's fluctuating strictness when it comes to uniforms in his Ensign Ro review by adding in dialogue where Ro calls them out on having insisted she remove an earring then seating her at a table with Troi, who's wearing a low-cut body-hugger, and Worf, whose Klingon baldric covers a substantial portion of his chest.
Ro: Did you sit me next to somebody in a low-cut body-hugger as a sick joke, or are you just that brazen in your favouritism?
In a flashback to her first day on VOY ("Relatvity") Janeway tries enticing an aged admiral with a sex act involving sprinkling Marshmallow Peeps on...someone. Eeegh.
In "The Outcast," he keeps coming up with ridiculous items a gendered person would need to have sex with a non-gendered person.
In "The Disease", he quotes his grandfather: "Boy, don't ever put your dick in something that lights up!"
In "Behind the Lines", he questions Odo's addiction to "linking" with the Female Changeling five times per day. "Even Dukat took a minute to grab some Gatorade and rotate the chickens."
In "Realm of Fear" (as part of a joke comparing the engineering crew's experiment to replicate an accident to MythBusters):
SF Debris: "They figure the first thing they should do is go ahead with that repeating the accident plan, and sure enough—there's an accident!(applauds) Yay science! But of course now we've got to duplicate the myth: we'll need twenty kilotons of TNT, a World War One aero-tank and 16,000 blue M&Ms".
Which is actually how real science works- being able to reproduce results is the underlying point of the Scientific Method.
The Telosian goes to great lengths to tailor his Gilded Cage to Captain Pike's tastes:
Teslosian: ...like the thing with the naughty milkmaid and the three kittens and the strapping farmhand— Pike:(furious) Yeah, I GET it!
Noodle Incident: "Noam Chomsky won't return my calls since the incident with the rice pudding." ("Darmok" Follow-up)
"Am I cursed or something? I keep running into underage Japanese girls in uncomfortable situations!" ("Rascals")
That one isn't a noodle incident, actually: he had just completed the review of "Evangelion: 1.11" which featured an underaged, naked Rei Ayanami... in an uncomfortable situation.
For the two-part review of "Datalore" and "Brothers", he made passing reference to a slight.... snafu at Casa Chuck which delayed the schedule. This involved fighting off flying sharks, Moby Dick, a Kraken, several tsunamis, an aircraft carrier, and the Death Star.
No OSHA Compliance: Said almost word-for-word on the handrail's lack of safety in Enterprise's "Unexpected".
The fact that Voyager has a "manual override" that needs power in order to work.
Sf Debris: A manual override is supposed to work if everything else is broken! This is like having an emergency light that plugs into the wall or a parachute with a rope that keeps it connected to the aeroplane. You're defeating the whole purpose of making a manual override! Even in a show where cheese is destroying the ship, that's stupid!
In the review of "The Long Twilight Struggle" he quotes this trope almost word-for-word again by pointing out that a 8ft wide catwalk spanning across a bottomless pit has no guardrails.
The 'Unsafe at Any Speed Award' is given to any vessel that shows no OSHA compliance.
In "Brothers" he notes that apparently there are no safeguards in place on Orgus II to stop children from messing around with highly toxic plants in the botanical garden.
"Sacrifice of Angels:" The Jem'Hadar weren't vaporized by The Prophets. Turns out that it was something even more destructive — Janeway.
Janeway: It's the Mind Bomb! It runs on the power of the human heart! [beat] I mean emotions. God! Why do you people always assume the worst? Sisko: So, it amplifies your emotions as a weapon? Janeway: After it's sucked them out of you and left you mentally soulless, yes.
Not So Different: In his Legend Of Korra review, Chuck rebuts Tarrlok's in-universe use of this trope on Korra. He points out that while both characters go to extreme lengths in pursuit of their own goals, Tarrlok's extremism is a sign he's failing as a government leader, antagonizing broad swaths of the populace and leaving them without non-violent means of protest. Korra, by contrast, is only resorting to intimidation because Tarrlok is unbalancing society, something which the Avatar's job description requires Korra to correct by any means necessary.
Nothing Is the Same Anymore: Believes that while fans decry it whenever it's mentioned, Wolf-359 really was the 9/11 of the Star Trek universe, at which point the peaceful exploration era died. From this point on the Federation stopped acting willy-nilly with their Wide-Eyed Idealist philosophy and was forced to become more militaristic in the name of their own defence. There were now badass aliens out there who wanted nothing more than to kill them, so like it or not, they had to deal with it.
Best shown by the Federation putting a taskforce together that lead to the creation of "USS Ben Sisko's motherfu-", I mean, the "Defiant". When asked about it, even Sisko is willing to freely admit that while it's officially classed as an escort vessel, the truth of the matter is, it's obviously a goddamn warship!
But also shown in "I Borg," (The Next Generation), where he asks "What would that sanctimonious guy from season one think if he saw his future self discussing annihilating an entire race?" (in discussing if they should use "Hugh" as a weapon or not). He points out that in a pre-359 world, the Enterprise would never have considered wiping out anyone, but in a post-359 world, destroying the soulless cybernetic monsters who want to consume them all is deemed... well, it's needed enough that they can actually discuss the pros and cons of such an action, rather than simply saying "No, we're the Federation, and we don't do that."
In "Death Wish" Q decides to summon important figures from human history. Sir Isaac Newton, Will Riker... and some guy from Woodstock.
From his review of Twin Peaks, describing Agent Cooper's methods: "I normally don't use the phrase 'I shit you not', except when I'm teaching Sunday school, but in this case, I can't think of anything more appropriate."
His video discussing several rumors of found Doctor WhoLost Episodes has him mentioning the show's distributor in Africa, Television International Enterprises... which also happened to have been created by the founder of the SAS as both a means to keep spreading British culture as well as serve as cover for a mercenary company. He also casts doubt at claims that TIE had access to some of the episodes during a particular time period since a that point, the founder was busy plotting to overthrow Muammar Gaddafi.
Chuck: "More [consoles] go up, and soon the entire bridge is filled with smoke. The irony of all this? There's a 'No Smoking' sign on the bridge. I'm not joking."
Not So Different: Points out the Bynars remove a baby's brain at birth and implant cybernetic relays so they have their individuality stripped away. No different than the Borg. He also plays it for laughs when he points out to Chuck!Picard that since they only do this to children, they're better. Chuck!Picard is stumped on if they're right or not.
Also points out the ex-Borg from "Unity" want to forcibly strip away the individuality of the other ex-drones who are attacking their community, in order to create a unified harmony between themselves ones again... which he speculates might be how the Borg started in the first place.
His Coda for Tuvix draws hilarious comparisons between Janeway and GLaDOS from Portal.
Jokes about "Janeway of Borg" given her penchant for assimilating lowlifes into her motley collective of misfits.
Also points out how the Borg Queen attempting to control Seven in Dark Frontier is contrasted with Janeway giving her an direct order in the same scene, because Seven must decide now who she wants to boss her around for the rest of her life.
"Latent Image" gives us a segment called "My Way or Janeway", contrasting his Crazy!Janeway with the actions of the real Janeway in that episode. He stops doing this halfway through because he thinks Janeway actually went beyond even the realms of his parody when she ordered all evidence of Ensign Jetal to be erased from existence.
In "The First Duty" he notes that Nick Locarno is essentially the young Picard, who never had the mentor in Boothby that lead him to eventually confess for his misdeeds. Locarno, much like the younger Picard seen in Tapestry is intelligent, a natural leader, but reckless and undisciplined. Both have similar scenes where they try to bring Wesley around to their way of thinking, hence his dilemma over trying to figure out what version of Picard he should listen to.
In "The End Of Time", during the brief recap of the end of "Waters of Mars", he highlights the Doctor's capacity for evil by overlaying the Master's Evil Laugh while the Doctor gives his "Timelord Victorious" speech;
Master: *Voiceover* There is some evil in all of us Doctor... even you.
In "Up The Long Ladder", Picard intentionally destroys two unique cultures by forcing them together for the greater good, with their own feelings on the matter considered completely irrelevant by everyone and essentially states that they either comply with his wishes or he will leave them to die. Chuck points out that this is exactly the same mentality that the Borg have.
In "Hide and Q", Picard gives Riker a pat on the back for refusing to save a dying little girl. He jokes that Picard's position is that she needed to die and that they must remove the weak from the herd, then morphs him into a Dalek.
No True Scotsman / True Art: One of Chuck's Berserk Buttons are fans who sneer down at others for not sharing their own opinion as not being "true" fans as well as fans who dismiss any other opinion as automatically being because the others guys were too "stupid" to get it.
And the genuine article, Shatner himself: (Wrath of Khan)
Kirk:MISTER TAMBOURINE MAAAAAN!
In "The Conscience of the King", Kirk comes across the murdered Layton and, lacking a Doctor with a good baked beans recipe, grimly says, "He's dead, Me." Also, Kirk's reminiscence of how different he was 20 years ago. ("You wouldn't even recognize me, I was Chris Pine.")
Spock's inner thoughts while listening to a hippie's jive speak. ("Way to Eden")
Kirk's confident that he and the crew can time travel safety, as they've done it one other occasion. (IV)
When Data wanders on-set in a bowler hat and silk vest, Chuck assumes he's gone into pimping. ("Time's Arrow")
Data: I do hope for both our sakes you do better tomorrow, Candy, for neither of us wishes that Data does slap a bitch.
After Picard delivers his scathing rebuke to Wesley in "The First Duty":
Wesley: So you care about my "doodie"? Picard: Save the toilet humor for Riker. Wesley: Don't you mean number one? Picard: Damn it, this is serious! You're in- Wesley: Deep "doodie"? Picard: Get the hell out!
A double whammy in "Where No Man Has Gone Before", when Picard is tempted to remain in uncharted space for awhile and poke around.
"There could be whole new species out here for him to find and surrender to! —But they could end up getting stranded out here and having to spend the entire rest of the series trying to get home. And who the hell wants to watch that crap?"
Barclay trying to relax in his quarters with taped sounds of whalesong, birdsong and the like... ("Realm of Fear")
Barclay: Computer, more birds. The Byrds: To every thing, turn, turn, turn...
Chekhov's magic ability to turn reporters into nurses. (Generations)
"You and you. You've just become nurses, let's go." (leaves) Chuck: The only time Chekhov's ever said that line was to two hookers on Risa!
When Worf deactivates Data with a palm-sized phaser, it sounds like a car lock remote. (Insurrection)
Similarly, when Spock arrives on the Abrams!Trek Bridge, it boots up like a Mac.
When Nemesis pans over the Romulan Senate in session, Chuck explains that they're voting to add a second hairstyle to their species.
What score did he give "The Magnificent Ferengi"? You get seven guesses.
From the In The Pale Moonlight intro:
Vreenak: "It's a FAAAAAKE!" Chuck: "OK, everybody got that out of our system now? No need to fall back on any hackneyed internet memes, right? Especially once we realize that every time you masturbate, God does indeed kill a kitten, and I for one welcome our Domo-Kun overlords, and remind my fellow earthlings that All Your Base Are Belong to Us because IT'S A TRAP!!!
When the President of Slug-o-Cola consults Quark on a new ad campaign, a lightbulb goes off: New Slug-o-cola! ("Profit and Lace")
"Projections" (VOY): Being on Voyager is destroying the Doctor's brain.
"Year of Hell", otherwise known as TNG's first season.
Annorax presenting an unusual offer to Paris and Chakotay: ("Year of Hell")
"When I first encountered your vessel it was badly damaged, barely functioning. What if I told you in a blink of an eye, I can restore her to its former condition?" Chuck: All we have to do is... let the episode end, and you'll be right as rain next week. Trust me, I know it doesn't make any sense but it always works that way for you.
Neelix's new menu item, "Elixir of Endurance." It provides +40 HP and 5% damage reduction.
From "Counterpoint", in a scene between Janeway and Inspector Kashyk:
Chuck: "One is a jackbooted oppressor sowing fear and hopelessness everywhere... and the other's an inspector. Thank you Joke Formula Number 97!"
"The Thaw"'s Clown chops a log in half with his guillotine, proving that "no matter how wooden Harry is, he's still not safe."
"We were in the middle of the Central American jungle looking for the ancient Rubber People." ("Tattoo")
Chuck: Oh, the Trojans.
He goes hog wild in "Living Witness". Of course, if you're among those who've actually seen the episode, did you expect any less?
Curator:Voyager had many weapons at their disposal, including species they'd assimilated along the way. Chuck: The means is called a "com-badge". Curator: Now, what you are about to see is graphic and unsettling... Chuck: Ah, this must be Neelix's cooking show.
A Jeffries tube leads to a wet bar in "The Killing Game Pt. 2", prompting Chuck to comment that this was Scotty's architectural dream.
Past!Janeway standing agape at Tom's cheesy Captain Proton sim. "Were these characters always this ridiculous?" ("Shattered")
Chakotay: Oh no, no Torres used be a lot worse than she is n— oh, you mean these guys.
In keeping with a running gag involving the high-strung Janeway confessing her past and present criminal activity by accident we got this exchange from "Bride of Chaotica". Tom confirms that Doctor Chaotica has a death ray at his disposal, causing Tuvok to deadpan, "A pity we don't have one." Cut to Janeway cloaked in shadow, who grimly replies, "...Yes. Isn't it just."
It isn't long into the episode that Chuck realizes there's not much difference between VOY's pastiche of juvenile, B-movie sci-fi and the average Voyager script. This inevitably leads into a "Dark Overlording" competition between Chaotica and Janeway.
In "Azadi Prime" he was obliged to note that the Spherebuilders did not design T'Pol's implants.
"Carpenter Street" (ENT) opens with Leland Orser picking up hookers, because it's always best to write what you know! ("Right, Brannon?")
Tucker muses that he never thought the NX-01's voyage would come to an end, and Chuck completes the thought. ("These Are the Voyages...")
(southern drawl) "Man, when they didn't cancel us after "A Night in Sickbay", I figured we were bulletproof!"
Immediately after Colin Baker's famed admonishment to the fans, "I am the Doctor, whether you like it or not," we cut to a BBC newscast from February 27, 1985 announcing the 18 month hiatus of Doctor Who.Boom.
Senator Warren wants to know what America is to think of a superpowered vigilante, stabbing people with needles left and right, and who is answerable to no one.
Diana: You could suggest that a country in a double war, facing a double-dip recession, and double digit unemployment— Chuck: —That Double-Ds are the answer?
Obvious Stunt Double: He highlights this in his reviews when it pops up, but also explains why it does with older shows. Basically on old, small, fuzzy tv sets of yesteryear the technology meant that even the most superficial resemblance could be gotten away, but as technology advanced and we got better and bigger televisions it became more noticeable when a non-lookalike stunt "double" was used. Also, back then most people didn't have means to record television, so any mistake would be quickly forgotten about.
Offscreen Villainy: He calls out the 2011 Wonder Woman pilot for a particularly bad case of this. We're told a character is a drug dealer, but all we see of him is being chased down and brutally captured by Wonder Woman (who throws a lasso around the guy's neck, lifts him up in the air, slams him down onto concrete, stabs him with a needle, and has to turn him over to the police before she can do anything else), and then being tortured by her in his hospital bed. It doesn't help that this rendition of Wonder Woman definitely seems like the kind of person who would go after someone without any real evidence.
Older Is Better: Regarding the Temporal Cold War arc on Enterprise, Daniels says that he can travel through time physically while Future Guy can only project his image due to being based earlier in the future and using less advanced technology. Chuck notes how little sense this makes when Kirk already could take the entire Enterprise into the past on several occasions without any outside help.
The Omniscient Council of Vagueness: From "Blood" of The X-Files: When Scully wonders who might be testing LSD-M on poor citizens and relaying subliminal messages purposely, SF Debris happily enlightens her: "Evil people, duh! Who else? You know, men who sit at long tables in poorly lit rooms full of cigar smoking, talk about how they're going to controool the wooorld!"
Omniscient Morality License: Doesn't like the tendency in Trek to take complex moral issues lightly, find easy solutions, and for the show to essentially run on the principle of "whatever our protagonists think is right and the ones who disagree are always wrong", especially since it's not uncommon for the main characters to take inherently contradictory or outright opposite stances in different episodes. This is why Chuck often plays the Commander Contrarian role regardless of whether or not he otherwise might have actually agreed with the stance taken by the main characters (for instance, if their reasoning for said stance was properly presented instead of just assumed to be true because they're the good guys) and why he praises episodes that do a good job of acknowledging that there aren't always clear cut answers to some of these questions.
"Now I know what some of you probably want to say. Come on SF Debris. Give it a rest, you're reaching. To which I have two things to say: First, you can call me Chuck, we're all friends here. And I'm fully aware that as a personal name, SF Debris sounds like the secret identity of a Silver AgeDC villain."
The Doctor on Voyager, despite his raging ego frequently comes across this. Particularly his reaction in "Time and Again" to be the last person to know that Kes and Neelix came aboard. And there is now another crew. And Captain Janeway is missing.
Worf often served this role, particularly in "Where No One Has Gone Before" where he points out the crew is relying on the guy who got the Enterprise stranded at the edge of the galaxy in the first place to rescue them.
Taken further in "Darmok" where he has Worf berate everyone for constantly dismissing his suggestions to shoot the threat, in favour of some highly convoluted plan which only makes things worse, only for them to hypocritically solve the problem by ordering him to shoot them.
Hogan is depicted as one in a montage in "Basics", the episode in which he died.
When you murder the Gods of drug-fueled supersoldiers, they tend to be indiscriminate in their retribution. Hence a Starfleet Admiral's choice to order a Code WAAAAAAAHHH! ("The Die is Cast")note (For those Warhammer 40K fans, that "WAAAAAUGH" is a scream of terror, not the Ork Warcry. It basically means they're panicking, not that the Federation is going on a blood-soaked rampage).
Chakotay's plan, "Operation Common Sense". ("Scorpion")
"Operation Fruit Fly" ("Year of Hell"), which Janeway stupidly agrees to.
Operation Remove Moral Dilemma ("The Thaw").
Operation I DON'T NEED A REASON JUST OBEY ME!, courtesy of... aw hell, you know who. ("Unimatrix Zero")
He mocks Janeway naming a plan to break into a Borg ship "Operation Fort Knox," as it implies they'll fail. "What were your other choices, 'Operation Titanic,' or 'Operation Enterprise's Fifth Season?'"
"Operation BOO-YAH!" ("Scientific Method")
Plan "Leap Before You Look". Shockingly, it fails ("The Void").
Our Elves Are Better: Chuck references this trope in his review of Insurrection regarding the Ba'ku:
Chuck: You know what these people are? They're elves. [They're] smarter, in tune with nature, have greater gifts, live forever, and are white.
Out-of-Character Moment: Notes in "The Bonding", how strange it is that given Picard's long history of interest in archaeology (having almost chosen it as a career over Starfleet), he seemingly has no idea about the archaeological mission that his own ship is taking part in until it's half-underway, then acts completely uninterested when Data explains it to him.
In Nemesis, comments on the stupidity of Picard casually breaking the Prime Directive by driving a dune-buggy around on a Pre-Warp world, having Worf laser-gun down a bunch of the attacking locals, before escaping in a shuttle. All this leads him to believe that Picard doctors his Log entries.
Chuck: ...When she falls into a mud puddle, Discord explains that, like her friends, the balloons are laughing at her, not with her. Well, Pinkie Pie is not the most stable person... *Discord appears* ...named Pinkie Pie...
In "Fair Haven", he took umbrage with the EMH — a sentient program with missing genitalia — claiming he's no different from Janeway's Ken doll boyfriend on the holodeck. For a follow up, the Doctor boasts that he, too, stars in holographic porn including the the award-winning Orgasms Without Borders.
Kira: Please pass the salt, you murdering fascist! Dukat: Glad to help you, you crinkled-nose uptight bitch! Kira: "So what's on the agenda today? Murdering babies or just fathering illegitimate ones? No offense, Ziyal. Ziyal: ...Can we not do this? Dukat: Major, is it true that you're so frigid, First Minister Shakaar's penis now has twelve words for snow? Kira: When you go around on your rape sprees, are you worried that you’ve sired so many bastards, you may accidentally be plowing one of them, or are you just happy that you're finally doing something with your abandoned children? Again, no offense, Ziyal. Ziyal: Would anyone like to see my sketches? Kira: I bet your father would like to see your- Dukat: —Please pass the salt back, you filthy shrew. Kira: Why don't you just come over here and take it and claim that it was for the good of the Bajoran people?! Dukat: Same time tomorrow? Kira: I look forward to it.
Patrick Stewart Speech: In "Sleeping Dogs," Chuck says that Picard is so good at speeches, he could have been able to rally Custer's men at Little Big Horn to victory. If it were Archer, the Indians would have gone "Yeah, this just isn't worth it." and left.
Perfect Pacifist People: Chuck rips into this trope for the Insurrection review, both the "rural perfection" version in the film as well as the older "technological perfection" espoused by Roddenberry. He wonders why the hell everything is so clean if they're so agrarian (technology is to thank for our current concept of "clean", even modern farm work is incredibly dirty); moreso, he wonders how they even managed to kick out the Son'a if they're so "pacifistic" and the Son'a aren't.
Pet the Dog: When asked to do a review of a goodVoyager episode, he gushed over "The Thaw" - though still taking the time to snark at Harry Kim's questionable sexuality, of course.
He quite liked "Projections" from Voyager as well.
And he even answered the question of 'what would be a good Enterprise episode?'. The episode "Damage", apparently.
The earliest example of Chuck proving he has a soft side was in his review of "The Cloud", where, unprompted, he goes out of his way to praise the cast and director, noting that most of them tried their best and that the terrible writing wasn't their fault.
He spares Neelix a Stupid Neelix Moment in "Tattoo", partly because of the Chakotay-focused plot in the episode outdoes Neelix, but also because Neelix's eye was pretty badly hurt.
Even gives Braga some kudos in Dark Frontier pointing out that his introduction and handling of Seven's character was actually a very smart move as her character perfectly incorporates some of the best traits of Odo, Spock and Data as well as her own character arc, which is a stark contrast to the usual Static Character you find on Voyager.
He also defended Threshold (the short-lived show, not the Voyager episode, that has no redeeming qualities) which many people had written off purely because Braga was involved with its production.
Actually, while Threshold the episode is nonredeemable, he does praise Robert Mc Neill for acting his heart out and doing his best - as Sci Fi Debris points out, it's not his fault the episode sucked so much.
Gave "The Void" a score of 9/10, noting that it might have taken 6 years and come only a dozen episodes from the end of the series, but Voyager managed to finally realize what the show was supposed to be about!
Chuck gives Jeri Taylor a lot of flack for her Janeway-worship, but he praised her for her rewrite of "Chain of Command".
He does have pity for Garrett Wang and the way he was treated.
"I'm not above kicking a man when he's down but I do feel sorry when somebody keeps pushing him over first."
Planet of Hats: A regular target of Chuck's ire. In his review of "The Magnificent Ferengi," he says that if Raiders of the Lost Ark had been a Trek two-parter, Germany would've been painted as Mordor for the rest of the series.
Plot Armor: Directly referenced in "Starship Mine," where a minor character is killed by a phaser blast but Geordi, shot by the same gun, will eventually be fine. "That's why character shields are the most important part of Starfleet's arsenal."
Also how we've seen people survive much worst blasts and be fine, whereas Nog got hit once and lost a friggin leg!
Especially when Tuvok is only a few feet away from an exploding torpedo in "Year of Hell" and yet his permanent injury is blindness. "Imagine if the torpedo had actually collided with him! It just might have killed him!"
He also exclaimed, "Character Shields are failing" during the Kill 'em All season 4 finale of Andromeda.
Plot Immunity: Lampshaded when Dukat threatens to pitch Garak over a railing in Quark's bar. ("In Purgatory's Shadow")
"Don't bother flipping him over that, Dukat. He's not some nameless character, he's a Special Guest Star. He could survive a fall of at least five stories and get away with only a limp and a clever quip."
In First Contact, this turned out to be Picard's reasoning in splitting his away team as he did.
"Data! You and I are the ones with the best agents, let's beam up to the ship and check it out!"
Poe's Law: Invoked in the review of "Clues," when Chuck (as Data) offers an increasingly ridiculous set of hypotheticals — all of which are taken from plotlines in other Trek episodes.
The first time Chakotay walks onto the set in "Barge of the Dead", Chuck groans that we're in for another Indian legend about whatever he's holding. Chakotay, leaning on the fourth wall a bit, jokes, "it's what my ancestors used to call a monkey wrench."
Chuck: I officially like you, episode.
As Chuck is quick to remind his critics, Regular Janeway frequently exceeds Parody Janeway. ("Year of Hell")
"Yes, Parody Janeway is crazy, but there was always a method to her madness, while Regular Janeway feels madness by itself is just fine, thank you very much. She has stared into the abyss as it has stared into her... and the abyss said, "JESUS!"
It really is astounding how far Chuck's interpretation has extended from VOY. In "Liars, Guns and Money" (Farscape), we're introduced to Scorpius' moll, a spider-woman who fits every criteria for Janeway's aforementioned weaponized tarantulas (which apparently got loose in the Uncharted Territories at some point. Thanks, Cap'n!)
On the other hand, Chuck's Janeway is often more intelligent than the genuine article, particularly when negotiating terms with implacable enemies. ("In the Flesh")
Spoof!Janeway: Of course we'll give you the information on how the only weapon in existence that can stop you from invading the Federation works! And after that, would like me to carry you back to Fluidic Space piggyback-style? ♥ ...Jackass.
The same goes for Picard's hatred of children. When Riker admitted to letting a small girl die (in "Hide and Q"), Picard greeted him with an "'Atta boy!"
invoked Chuck noted the bitter irony of ENT turning out to be a bad dream i.e. holodeck program, something Trekkies such as himself were (sarcastically) hoping for all along.
Precision F-Strike: Delivers a rather chilling one at the end of his rant in "Real Life" about what it feels like to almost, or actually, lose a child.
"So don't tell me it builds. Fucking. Character."
In his review of "Howard the Duck", the titular character starts freaking out upon being given a plate of eggs, claiming he's being subjected to cannibalism:
Janeway earned one for forbidding B'Elanna to induce a religious near-death experience, in a series where senior officers routinely risk their lives for personal reasons. ("Barge of the Dead.")
"You wanna talk her out of it, fine. You're gonna force her not to do it? Fuck you, Captain!"
Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: "Must... resist... urge... to... make sex joke in teaser! ...urk ...have whole review to make them!" ("Code of Honor")
The NX-01's armor going "offline" in ENT's pilot. At first, Chuck tries explaining why ceramic armor — though it does run on electricity — can't be brought back "online" like deflector shields can. It then dawns on him that this is VOY's 'shout out shield numbers' standard battle sequence all over again, except with more nonsense words. ("Broken Bow")
Rape as Comedy: At the end of "Broken Bow", Chuck mentions that a scene where Klang strangles one of his Suliban captors looks disturbingly like a prelude to prison rape. This is then played for laughs during the outro.
Rape as Drama: Condemns the use of this in Star Trek: Nemesis, where the villains mind-rape/actually rape Deana Troi just to show how unpleasant they are and how much time they apparently have to spare.
Rape as Backstory: Wonders why Tasha Yar barely reacts to her abduction in "Code of Honor", which is completely at odds with the fact she spent most of her childhood dodging rape-gangs.
A Rare Sentence: Expresses praise for WALL•E's zero-G dance, "the kind of heartwarming image that can only be achieved by a trash compactor trying to slalom around flame jets the size of a small garage using only a fire extinguisher. "
Really Dead Montage: Chuck, believing that Kirk deserved better than what happened to him in Generations, gives him a fitting sendoff — courtesy of Journey.
Following his (latest) death in "Scorpion", we see a montage of Harry Kim's numerous beatings/deaths/humiliations throughout the show as Enya's "Only Time" plays. ...Epic.
Not satisfied with Data's rather flat death and lame wake in Nemesis, Chuck throws together a montage of Data dreaming and experiencing human things while the narration of Jor-El from Superman plays.
And even the above was topped by the following for Lutan in Code of Honor.
"Lutan, you understand honor like Neelix understands sex appeal. You've heard of it; you probably think you have it, but buddy, there's not a smidgen of it in your body. Your smile is as warm and inviting as an icewater enema, your so-called 'charm' is so forced and transparent, so clearly septic, I wouldn't be surprised if your voice leaves an oil slick. And your attempts to project authority are nothing of the kind, but of a spoiled child who's been handed everything in life, expecting to constantly get, and annoyed when it's not given. You do not radiate authority; you ooze self-entitled smugness. A toxic barrage, scientifically proven to be the first, second and third cause of cancer in laboratory rats; which made the scientists cry, because they found the rats more personable than you. And your attempts to be sly? STOP. It's so sickening it gives flu bugs nausea. So, please Harry Potter, wrap yourself in that magic cloak of yours and disappear already. Don't come back out, until you get the secret sign. If you want to know what it is, it's the sight of the sun, swallowing the world."
Another speech is deployed in the review of the Farscape episode, "The Way We Weren't", when Zhaan's hypocritical condemnation of Aeryn gets too much for Chuck:
(Tuts disapprovingly) You know, didn't want to have to do this, didn't want to drag this out and have it seem like I've got it out for you or something, but... I do have this little card I've been keeping in a safe place, with the label "In case of sanctimonious twat, break glass." Why are you on Moya in the first place? Huh? Do you remember that? Oh yeah- YOU KILLED A MAN! You murdered him in cold blood! The reason you're Reverend Treehugger Von Condescension is because, since then, you have changed. You have embraced a new path... WHICH AERYN HAS FRICKIN' DONE! The only difference between the two of you is shewas a soldier following orders, and you just figured you'd kill somebody because you thought he'd done something wrong, so you figured you'd pass judgment on him- which I guess just goes to show you haven't changed all that much, have you?
I've been with you for mere minutes and I'm already praying for your horrible death in a transporter accident to give you your just end, which I believe will result in a net increase in happiness on a universal level. I am convinced that 4 out of 5 doctors had you listed as the recommended treatment for curing joy, and that's only because the fifth one hanged himself! If I was trapped in a room with only you, Neelix and Okona and had only two bullets, I would shoot MYSELF. When the Bible says 'Love all people', there's an asterisk and a footnote that says "except Lwaxana Troi." And speaking of Troy, if Helena had looked like you, it would've been the face that launched a thousand ships back home! In short, your philosophy that people should only say what they're thinking is undermined by the fact that you are completely loathsome, marinated in arrogance and heavily seasoned with self-absorbtion, so that the unfiltered slurry that gurgles from your gob unceasingly is a pollutant that I would like to see stopped, either voluntarily, or- by my preference- plugging the source with a grenade.
Thanks for asking.
"Paradise" turns into a long (and deserved) rant against Alexis.
He was so put off by Janeway's callous intolerence of the Klingon religion in "Barge of the Dead" that he amended her speech (as it "wasn't judgmental enough"). Ahem:
"Your backward superstitious malarkey is so absurd, I wish I could floss my brain to get the bits of stupid out. And the only reason I'm not even tryin' to change your mind on it is that anything approaching rational thought would bounce off that thick plate on your forehead—assuming that's Klingon ridges and not a massive brain tumor responsible for your long string of bad decisions. But wow. Even I never thought you'd be so damn stupid as to want to try this, but you proved me wrong! Looks like I owe Chakotay a Coke. He told me you'd never be safe aboard this ship so long as there was a sharp thing not covered in cork. If you wanna have a near-death experience, Torres, here's my suggestion: follow every ill-advised thought that pops into your little pea brain over the next half-hour, and I guarantee one of them will have you in Sick Bay or the morgue. ...Look, I have real shit to do around here, okay, so kindly hop onto your little Gondola of Tedious Bullshit and sail down to Engineering, Joan of Arc!"
Wonder Woman, of all people, earns one for pointlessly leading three lives — superhero, corporate leader, and humble member of the hoi polloi — and she sucks at all three.
In Star Trek II, a bit of road rage compelled him to call out a fellow motorist and compare him to Khan Noonien Singh. Yes.
"Earlier this month I was at a red light, ready to turn right, but stopped, causing the driver behind me to honk repeatedly. However, while it's legal to turn right on red, it's generally not advisable when the road is wet and there's a tractor trailer approaching. Apparently, though, the man behind me felt that we were not just two drivers on the road, no; somehow we were joined on an unspoken suicide pact that I was thoughtlessly reneging on. When the truck passed, I went on my way, followed by the other driver who, ignoring the wet pavement, ran another red light and — unconcerned about little things like the presence of other vehicles on the road — sped up to pull alongside me and repeatedly honked his horn to get my attention for quite a long time, until finally I gave in and looked at him so he could flip me off and be on his way. And that was all. This cro-magnon felt that it wasn't enough to just flip me off; he was prepared to risk himself and others just to make sure I knew he was doing it. He couldn't handle me not knowing it, whereas I am quite unbothered that he'll never know that I'm saying that he's a phallically-challenged maladjusted uncivilized moronic social cripple whose only possible contribution for society would be if someone created an engine that could run on loser. And while he will never know it, I'm fine with merely sharing that feeling with tens of thousands of people instead.
invoked It took over a decade, but Brannon Braga's poison pen finally overreached with "Bounty".
"Annoying Character' goes to T'Pol, continuing B&B's theme of character assassination of their own creations. You'd think they were trying to burn the show down for the insurance money....It's an avatar for Enterprise at its most banal — although Braga might've mistakenly have heard 'anal' and thought it was a compliment. It's NOT. This episode combined hack storytelling at its most unimaginative with a hatred for women which could only be achieved if your family was murdered by angry tampons! Even in a series that thought the height of comedy was raping one of their own cast, this managed to surprise me. It's the first Trek episode I've seen where the credits should've included, 'Based on Something I Left In A Sock'!"''
Reset Button: Voyagerlives on this trope, so of course Chuck brings it up, and that's even what he calls it. "The creators of Voyager fear change," as he put it.
Spoofed again in "The Child."
Pulaski: She had her baby yesterday. If I were to examine her now, I would not be able to tell she had a baby, or had ever had a baby. It was as if the incident never happened.
Chuck (as Picard): Yes, well, it's your first Star Trek episode, you'll get used to it.
Lampshades that the entire plot of "Cause and Effect" revolves around this:
Chuck: Look at this, Star Trek uses the reset button so often it's become a plot device.
Discussed at length in the "Year of Hell" (VOY) review, especially in comparison to those times when a Reset Button was used correctly (to great success, and a Hugo Award) in TNG. Chuck's view is that you can use a Reset Button successfully only if something (e.g. a character's memory of the events) carries over to the rest of the show.
Retcon: Whenever characters say something that demonstrates ignorance of the events of Enterprise, he will imagine the character proclaiming "Jonathan Archer is dead to me/us."
RetGone: In "Cold Front", surmises that Enterprise should have been a Bittersweet Ending with the crew making the ultimate sacrifice, removing themselves from the timeline to end the Temporal Cold War, thus explaining why no-one had ever heard of them in the 24th century.
Retirony: Lampshaded during the review of "Innocence" (VOY), where at the beginning of the episode a Goldshirt lies dying and decides to mention that he has no family back home, nobody to miss him.
Chuck: Geez, it's like you want the script-gods to kill you. "I gotta make it! I'm just... two days to retirement!"
Rock Bottom: Ten minutes into reviewing the (TNG) episode "Masks," Chuck consoles poor Picard.
"You may have lost the ship, but at least you still have your dig— (Picard turns, wearing a goofy faux-Aztec mask) ...ni...ty."
Picard's reaction when he sees the wreckage of the Enterprise-D.
Chuck: [as Picard] What a day. I get beaten up by Soran, accidentally kill Starfleet's greatest hero... I can't imagine how could this day could possibly get any — the hell?! WHAT THE GOD DAMN HELL HAPPENED WITH THE — [sputters incoherently] ...SHIT!!!
"It seems like Sisko's lost just about everything; I mean, his ship, his station, his hair...oh crap, and his son, too! Sisko, keep an eye on your pants, someone might try to steal those, too."
"It could be argued that the events to come would've had even more of an emotional impact if it had been Saavik and not Valeris in the role. However, this can be forgiven because...Valeris is hot."
Why did Crichton decide to unlock Aeryn Sun's restraints and ask her to come with him in the premiere episode of Farscape:
Chuck: Because... because it's Claudia Black, for god's sake! The woman's a hottie with a voice that can cause a man's fly to open by itself!
Ron the Death Eater:invoked Let's look at the scorecard: We have Janeway, a low-functioning sociopath and nymphomaniac who stranded her own crew in space in order to amass an army to take over the Alpha Quadrant as a a first step toward converting the Federation into a vehicle for galactic conquest. On the other side, we have the unholy trifecta of Phlox, T'Pol and Archer, who are collectively responsible for the creation of some of Star Trek's most vile enemies.
Rubber-Forehead Aliens: Another snark-target that he consistently approaches. Neelix gets the worst of it, being continually referred to as a hedgehog, but the Forehead of the Week is often up for mockery. Such as people who have feathers for hair, guys with six extra nostrils going up their forehead (as in "Warlord"), aliens with "coat-hook" tusks sticking out of their chins, and the inexplicable feature of aliens with a bridge of flesh between their nose and their chin, obstructing their own mouth.
Chuck: As though it were an evolutionary feature just to prove that God loves fuckin' with atheists.
And he takes issue with the Andorians in Enterprise being given rubber foreheads, as if the blue skin and antennae weren't enough to tip us off that they were aliens.
Shows how this can backfire in an "Unfortunate Implicationsinvoked" manner in his review of "Alliances" (from Voyager), where the darker-skinned, more heavily costumed aliens (the Kazon) are viewed as animals, and Janeway tries to make an alliance with the alien race that only appears in this episode, thus using much lighter makeup and less elaborate forehead. So it can (he points out) come across as Janeway making an alliance with white people to fight dark-skinned barbarian idiots.
Chuck!Janeway: Of course we'll make an alliance with you, you're white!"
Russian Reversal: Referenced in relation to the Soviet-built Tsiolkovsky in "The Naked Now".
(as Picard) You know, number one, in your country, you send ships into space, but in Soviet Russia, ship sends YOU into space!... Hey, where are you all going? Well, looks like they're screwed; unable to muck with the tractor beam that can only pull things...it looks like that ship seeking boulder is going to take out the Enterprise and Tsiolkovsky, which won't make them happy back in Soviet Russia. Wait, that's it! In Soviet Russia, tractor beam will PUSH!