Welcome to Morton's Basics
! I, Morton Koopa Jr., sultan of Desert Land
, emperor of Donut Plains
, master of all things hot, and a pretty mean breakdancer
, am going to show you the ropes, how things work, the basics! I'll even show, teach, demonstrate, point out... whoops, there I go again! Lemmy said if I talk too much I'd scare away all the tourists, visitors, and guests, so I have to tone it down, talk less, keep my mouth shut more, or I'll be in trouble, get punished, find out what the or else is. I think, believe, feel that I should start being quiet, get silent, shush now, right this second, at the present, immediately, instantaneously- ARGH! It's so hard to stop talking, but I'll try really really really hard. Starting now. Yeah.