Original air date: 11/19/2014
The boys blow off going to the girl's volleyball game to watch Kenny fight in the manliest of blood sports: Magic: The Gathering. When the school janitor overhears the boys talking about it, he points them to City Wok and the underground sport of Cock Magic — roosters that play Magic. However, Randy mistakes it for a different kind of Cock Magic and starts practicing his stage magician act again.
Cock Magic contains examples of:
- Ask a Stupid Question...: When the boys arrive at City Wok to see their first illegal Cock Magic match, this exchange occurs:Tuong Lu Kim: Are you police?Cartman: Do we look like police?
- Beastly Bloodsports: Parodied. Modern "Cock Magic" is nothing but roosters playing Magic The Gathering instead of actually fighting. Shockingly clean, somewhat wholesome fun. However, it's completely treated like actual cock fighting, from the way it's run to the utter zeal against it.
- Contrived Coincidence: Randy just happened to set up a Cock Magic show at the same place a Cock Magic gathering was taking place.
- Conveniently Timed Distraction: When the cops arrives to arrest everyone for partaking in illegal cock magic fighting, Randy appears on stage and performs his version of "cock" magic. This distracts the cops long enough for all the people who were involved in the cock magic fights to escape.
- Groin Attack: Several of Randy's "Cock Magic" tricks involve either sawing off his penis or freezing it then shooting it off, only for it to reappear somewhere else and him reattaching it.
- Idiot Houdini: Randy gets no comeuppance for traumatizing a bunch of kids with his Cock Magic show at a party thanks to police's sheer stupidity.
- Mundane Made Awesome: Parodied, in a way. Magic: The Gathering is made out to be a vicious bloodsport played only by the manliest of men, even when it's simply two people at a table methodically playing a card game.
- Oh, Crap!: Stan has a bit of a freak out when he finds out that Wendy is the captain of the girl's volleyball team.
- One Dialogue, Two Conversations: Subverted and played straight.
- Subverted is when the boys are talking about seeing their game as Hardcore. The janitor overhears them and tells them if they want to see real hardcore to go to a location. When they get there we see what is essentially the set up to a cock fight, only for them to be playing Magic.
- Played straight with Randy, when he keeps thinking when someone says Cock Magic (roosters playing Magic) that they're referring to his penis-based magic tricks. Also the police share this as they are trying to bust the group in the former when people are trying to tell them about Randy doing the latter.
- A Pig Named "Porkchop": The boys name the chicken that they adopt "McNuggets".
- Refuge in Audacity: Randy's "Cock" Magic runs on it. His stage name is the "Amazingly Randi". He got kicked out of college for it. His first act coming out of retirement is a birthday party, and he traumatizes the kids there.
- Serious Business: Magic: The Gathering.
- Take That!: When told that free range cocks prefer control decks Cartman responds by saying they don't want a free range one.
- Win-Win Ending: Completely subverted. Stan considers combining volleyball with Cock Magic a win for everyone, but while he can now enjoy watching Wendy play, it's no fun for Wendy or the other girls. Although despite that, his heart is clearly in the right place.
