Bushwick, where we find the assembled members of Pamela Lansbury as Kurt reveals their first gig, at the same spot we saw last season, Callbacks. The others are hesitant, all wanting a proper venue to find the right people. Kurt is in the same state as his fiancee, namely pouting when others don't follow. He tries to paint a picture of them on stage, leading to an Imagine Spot of some Madonna. Afterwards, Klaine speaks, Kurt telling Blaine not to be too aggressive, lest he be called a Title Drop. He then invites him to PL's first gig and as Blaine wonders why anyone would think he was controlling, we pan over to the school controller, Sue chastising Janitor Figgins because she can. She says the school board is coming to see if her job should be officially permanent, citing how with her in charge, test scores have gone up and due to a new caning policy, attendance has been perfect. Cut to Superintendant Harris and a lackey for a pre-evaulation. Sue says she was born to be in charge, citing the aforementioned changes. She then says if she's in charge, within a year McKinley will be the top school in Ohio. They're sold for now, but as Harris leaves, he notices the trophies and finds out about Sue's seven Nationals wins, impressed enough to ask "him" out for a friendly beer. Oh dear. Cut to Sue lamenting to Becky about her trademark look. We then get Sue's Start of Darkness circa '86: started out fairly feminine, but no one took her seriously, including a still full of hair Figgins. Thusly, the hair is cut, and the tracksuits are deployed. Back in the present, Becky says everyone is petrified of her, but it wouldn't hurt to "girl" it up a bit. Sue ponders as we cut to Blaine in the choir room, spooked by a sudden Brad Ellis, who actually speaks, seems he's mixed up in some dubious online gambling. Poor guy. If/When Glee's inevitably revived, he should get a lead role and have at least one piano solo per episode. Anyway, Blaine's ego chooses that moment to inflate, and we get a Rachel Season 1-style rant on his supposed greatness. Joy. As he sits down, the air conditioner, or gas grate, suddenly causes him to hit the induced Mushroom Samba, and from there... we get the payoff to the title. Yes folks, straight out of the Jim Henson finery comes the rest of the cast in their finest felt. The ND puppets all sing praise to the Anderson, as this leads to a bit of Queen for the dubious "king". Afterwards, he snaps back to reality... though not without Puppet!Unique. Hmm.
After the break, we're in a dance studio with Jake still choreographing Cheerios! and clearly tired of doing so. All well and good, but the thing is we see Bree, in her last appearance, amongst them, kinda sluggish... ho boy. We'll explain later as we cut to Blaine thanking Jake for sticking up for him in the teaser. He then tells him about the puppet hallucination, inviting him to take a hit too. Yeah, Blaine? Right now that may be the least of his worries. Back in the choir room where Jake won't teach ND how to dance either. He sits where Blaine sat and that cues up his Mushroom Samba, namely him, Bree, and Marley mashing up two of Janet's finest, another Shot-for-Shot Remake. Afterwards, as Figgins wakes Jake up, we're in an arts class, where Blaine apparently is inspired by his hallucination that he wants to make a puppet Kurt. The teacher rightfully asks why and Blaine misses Kurt more than we thought. And yes, we then get Blaine down the halls with his fiancee analog and this is both strange and sad. Speaking of, we cut to Sue... in tracksuit and stilettos. Oh my. She trips on her own feet, then rightfully confiscates Puppet!Kurt because she wants Harris to see that everything is perfect. Blaine then sheds a tear. Right.
After the break, and after Sue bins the heels, we see her approach Will. Since he's helped her find her feminine side before, she asks him again. He tries to counter with money for Nationals costumes, only for her to correctly refuse on grounds that, well... remember in Season 1 when April Rhodes bought the auditorium, thus explaining all the costumes and props used until then? Right. One, we'll explore this later on, two, Will, for not remembering all this time, you're an idiot. As Will leaves, the hallucinogens kick in and it's Sue's turn for the Mushroom Samba, a duet with Will appropriately set to some Fred Astaire. Afterwards, it's Becky that wakes her up as we cut to Bree... dragging Jake to a corner of the school... yep. Truly cementing his status as Generation Xerox, once again, a Puckerman has knocked up a Cheerio!. Major Deja Vu going on here. Anyway, Jake is displeased, and from there, we get very sad Mood Whiplash as we cut to Blaine, Domino Mask and all, sneaking into Sue's office to retrieve Puppet!Kurt. Okay, we get missing your fiancee. But really Anderson? And of course Sue catches him and gives him detention thus preventing him from attending Pamela Lansbury's first gig. After a slightly creepy sight gag of the puppet supposedly coming to life, we cut to full-sized Kurt calling Blaine, who tries to explain the puppet, while in another sight gag, we see real Kurt swapped for said puppet. Point is Kurt is not amused, and he gets twice as unamused as we cut to the venue and shocking no one, it's an all but empty house, the one person there only getting the "Lansbury" part of the name. PL is dilapidated as we go to break.
We return to see that Sue is starting to get desperate, asking Unique for help. She's a bit more accepting as we cut to the "Beck-fast Club" I mean detention, where permanent resident Becky sits, alongside Blaine and Jake, in for starting another fight. Blaine's Brain wanders and with puppets on the mind, the hallucinations return, this time serving as reason for Blaine to self-monologue about how his control issues are keeping him from his friends. Jake bails to find that Bree's late meaning Beth doesn't have to worry about a cousin. Praise. She gives him a deserved, but extremely hypocritical "The Reason You Suck" Speech as we go to break.
We return to see Sue lead the school board down the hall, her having gotten a makeover. Harris apologizes for his earlier mistake. She leads them into the choir room... and Figgins promptly arrives to try and blame her for the hallucinations, saying they're the result of a gas leak. Sue is one step ahead, fixing it herself and since Figs tattled he gets his pay cut in half. Oops. Sue is officially principal, then tries to ask Harris out. Susan should've quit while you're ahead because yep, he turns her down and sometimes you can't win for losing, though this of course means Sue will be out for all the blood. Cut to the stage where Blaine has a slight meltdown, then decides to make a Tina puppet because yes. The unamused full-sized Cohen-Chang arrives, relenting enough to tell Blaine that ND understands his pressures and apologizes, even offering him a lead at Nationals. Blaine is humbled, handing Puppet!Tina to actual Tina as we cut to Marley annoyed. Guess by whom? Yep, seems Jake figured he'd try for her again, but this time, she won't have it, declaring herself a friend only. Good Girl.
We return from break to start the home stretch with Kurt announcing Pamela Lansbury has a second wind; seems the one audience member from the first gig liked the show, made a bootleg to a nephew at the Music Hall Of Williamsburg, there you go. Then a package arrives, full of puppets because we need to drive the point home me thinks. In the choir room, Blaine apologizes for his behavior. Then more puppets. Then Ylvis. Because.
Next Time: Glee's final Christmas Episode... which is airing despite the in-universe school year being in Spring. Because.
Songs
- Into The Groove by Madonna, performed by Pamela Lansbury
- You're My Best Friend by Queen, performed by Blaine with New Directions
- Nasty/Rhythm Nation both by Janet Jackson, performed by Jake, Marley, and Bree with the Cheerios
- Cheek to Cheek, by Fred Astaire from Top Hat, performed by Sue and Will.
- The Fox (What The Fox Say?) by Ylvis performed by New Directions and Pamela Lansburynote
Tropes
-
Big-Lipped Alligator Moment: The most WTF episode in a pretty WTF season. -
The Danza: Brad (as always), and Todd Sandler as Todd. - Good Girls Avoid Abortion: It's not even up for discussion. As it turns out, Bree was just late. Also, unlike the earlier Alpha Bitches, Bree doesn't make a Heel–Face Turn.
- Imagine Spot: Kurt's Pamela Lansbury dream, Sue's Top Hat fantasy.
- Shout-Out: To The Breakfast Club during detention.
- Split Screen: While Blaine and Kurt are on the phone.
- The '80s: Heavily invoked during the first number, skinny ties, plastic accessories, and neon palate included. We also see an Eighties Sue during her flashback.
