'''Original air date''': September 30, 1999

Peter's Bible-thumping father, Francis, comes to visit, making Lois feel bad for being Protestant (since Francis is Catholic), Meg feel bad for having a crush on Joe's son, and Chris feel bad for pooping in the bathroom (which Francis mistakes for masturbating).
!!Tropes used in the episode:
* InnocentInnuendo:
--> '''Diane''': Tom, the city of Boston is examining its conscience tonight in preparation for a visit from the Pope.\\
'''Tom''': That's right, Diane. I'll tell you what else will be examined: This cock. (pulls up a rooster) The Rhode Island Cock Society is sponsoring free check-ups for this year's Cock Awareness Week.
* SentimentalMusicCue: Parodied; Peter has an orchestra on standby in case an emotional sitcom moment occurs.