Worried about their finances, Peter decides to supplement the family's income by becoming a beach bum who uses a metal detector to find valuable items. When that doesn't work, the family goes to the mall to return the metal detector, and happen upon a commercial audition for a child actor. Stewie gets the role, and Peter and Lois see it as a chance to exploit their child for fame and fortune, which Brian objects to.
Tropes:
- 15 Minutes of Fame: Stewie's acting career ends by the end of this episode.
- Abusive Parents: Lois and Peter become verbally abusive and exploit Stewie's new-found acting career for profit, to the point where they start drugging him and working him into the ground. Brian calls them out on it.
- Acquired Situational Narcissism: Despite Stewie being the one who gets an acting career, it's Lois and Peter who become abusive stage parents after getting a taste of its profits.
- G-Rated Drug: To keep Stewie going, they slip him a homemade energy drink called 8-hour Energy (which is made from 5-hour Energy, espresso, Scotts Turf Builder, and a "tiny, tiny super-small" amount of cocaine).
- Call-Back:
- The song that Lois plays on the piano is "Alley Cat", the melody of which was used by Phineas & Barnaby in their song "Steak and Eggs" in "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey".
- Peter mentions that Brian has a son who became a teen actor.
- Chris once again reacts violently to being touched
- Didn't Think This Through: Lois and Peter decide to exploit Stewie after his success in a peanut butter commercial. Wanting him to become a child star and make money off of it, they constantly give Stewie stimulants and drugs to keep him alert and active and constantly keep him awake all night to make him rehearse for other commercials. This ends up going very badly after Stewie has a meltdown in an orange juice commercial and Peter and Lois realize this wasn't a good idea.
- Everyone Has Standards: Brian becomes increasingly disgusted by Lois and Peter's exploitation of Stewie and continuous reckless spending of the money that was supposed to be for Stewie's future.
- Excrement Statement: While having an outburst on the set of an orange juice commercial, Stewie attempts to defecate in the pitcher, but can't do it while people are watching. He then ends up crapping himself as soon as he puts his clothes back on.
- Greed: Peter and Lois after Stewie's commercial success.
- Hypocrite: Subverted. Peter tries to counter Brian's point that Stewie's acting career shouldn’t impede his growth into a normal child by pointing out that his son is also an actor that Brian tried to mooch off of, with Brian countering that Peter's (step)father Francis hated his guts and died. However, while Brian did try to use his son's acting career to selfishly further his writing career, at least he did not overexert him nor have him ingest dangerous drugs in order to keep him active.
- Parental Favoritism: Stewie's becomes Peter's "favorite son" after getting his first commercial. Chris didn't take it well (but only because he Hates Being Touched, not because Peter's words hurt his feelings).
- Jerkass Realization: With a mix of *My God, What Have I Done?* Peter and Lois realize that after Stewie’s meltdown they realize it was their fault for pushing Stewie to his limits.
- Lethally Stupid: Peter uses his new 3D printer to print a coyote, which then immediately pounces on Chris.
- My God, What Have I Done?: Lois and Peter feel terrible for pushing Stewie too hard in acting and spending the money on themselves.
- Pet the Dog: Despite his flaws, Brian seemed genuinely concerned for Stewie's well-being and was disgusted when he discovered that Peter and Lois stooped to giving him drugs in order to improve his performance.
- Shout-Out: Brian names several former child actors to Stewie whose lives and careers ended badly for them, such examples such as Screech from Saved By The Bell and Dana Plato from Diff'Rent Strokes. Brian's demonstrations of child actors to Stewie. Although Stewie tries to put his trust in his parents, Brian sets out to show him that they no longer have his best interests at heart and tells him about other child actors that ended up in pornography and/or have died like:
- Scott Schwartz (who did porn).
- Dustin Diamond (who did porn, though died of cancer as of 2021).
- Andrew Koenig (who was found hanging from a tree).
- Corey Haim (who died of pneumonia).
- and Dana Plato (who did porn and later died of a multi-drug intoxication).
- Stage Mom: Peter and Lois evolve into this, blinded by greed from how profitable child acting is. They try to justify their actions with the excuse of saving money for Stewie's college but soon stop caring and now only care about the money for themselves.
- Trophy Child: Lois and Peter exploited and abused Stewie to profit from having a child star in the family.
- Weight Woe: Because of Peter and Lois, Stewie believes he is fat and prefers to just dipping a piece of celery into a cup of water and then throwing it away in order to maintain his "perfect child star" look.
