- In John's first conversation with Nannasprite:
JOHN: and then after that, we solve this ultimate riddle thing and save earth from destruction!!!
NANNASPRITE: Oh no, I'm afraid not!
NANNASPRITE: Your planet is done for, dear! There is nothing you can do about that!
- Rose reveals some very disturbing information:
TT: Your posters have looked like that ever since I first saw your room.
- "Everyone always ceases gunplay when Snowman's around. If you kill her you destroy the universe."
- This line from Dave reveals that the Flash Forward to four months is a Bad Future.
TG: what else is there to know
TG: we lost
- Courtesy of Aradia Megido:
AA: banished fr0m the universe we left behind
AA: and yet in being denied the ultimate reward
AA: we w0uld be barred fr0m entry
AA: int0 the universe we created.
- In the first "Alterniabound" ("Past Karkat: Wake Up") Equius gives us a shocking revelation about Sprites:
EQUIUS: Aurthor is dead.
- Dave listens to the Horrorterrors.
TG: im pretty sure it was
TG: a plea for help
- And then Rose reveals the identity of her informant:
TG: what you mean a troll
TT: It's a man who exists in another universe.
TT: He wants to die.
- A pretty big one came buried under lots of text here
GG: because he said hes my grandson
- "While a timer counts down with no particular clock stepping forward to claim it...The most important character in Homestuck fondly regards the miracle of a new beginning."
- One word shattered the expectations of fans: DEAD. It also overlaps with Unsound Effect.
- Kanaya informs Jade on the importance of the Genesis Frog:
GA: He Is Not Responsible For Just One Aspect Of The Universe You Create
GA: He's Responsible For All Of Them
GA: Bilious Slick Is Your Universe
- And with this line from Eridan, everything goes to hell:
CA: fight him
CA: are you fuckin nuts
CA: i slaughtered enough angels to knoww my limits and wwhere i stand against the lord of all angels they prophesized
CA: of course im not gonna fight him i stand no chance in hell against that guy
CA: im goin to join him
- Then after a series of shocking events: "Don't turn your back on the body."
- And then:
TC: shut up.
- Just before that, "TC: honk."/"TC: HONK." is a much more subtle one. The fact that he isn't using his typical Typing Quirk is the first indication that something is not right with him.
- You slip into the fabled blackdeath trance of the woegothics, quaking all the while in the bloodeldritch throes of the broodfester tongues. You advise the members of your Complacency not to be alarmed, as they chronicle the event in tomes bound in the tanned, writhing flesh of a tortured hellscholar, with runes stroked in the black tears bled from the corruption-weary eyes of fifty thousand imaginary occultists. But they fail to not be alarmed. This is because, as is now painfully obvious to anyone with a brain, you have basically gone completely off the deep end in every way. You have officially gone grimdark.
- "Pardon me while I let Jack inside."
- Doc Scratch gets a few of these during his intermission. Sorted by date:
- 5/25/11: "The duel ends. The Seer dies. The Slayer departs. The Heir comes back to life."
- 5/31/11: "With as little fanfare, he seized the opportunity to follow the Thief's trail quickly before it dissipated, and destroyed their hideout in the veil."
- 6/8/11: "What sort of story would this be, with our Knight and Seer made to stay cadavers? Certainly not one the alpha timeline would allow. And not one she'd allow either."
- 6/19/11: "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KILL HER."
- When Dreambubble John finally begins to remember the Awful Truth:
GT: This was not the suit i was wearing when i died.
- Davesprite explains to Jade his second encounter with Hephaestus:
DAVESPRITE: see it turns out
DAVESPRITE: i had no idea how the denizens worked at all
- From Nannasprite, on the identity of her adopted mother, Betty Crocker:
pipefan413: She knew the baroness was not human! :B
- Karkat apologizes:
PCG: I GAVE YOUR WHOLE UNIVERSE CANCER, JADE.
- Betty Crocker: @turntechGodhead Please enjoy. Mr. Strider. http://tinyurl.com/MoThErFuCkInMiRaClEs
- We find out why Gamzee is "the most important character in Homestuck":
TC: AND I WENT AND MADE YOUR UNIVERSE...
- Quoth Doc Scratch about an early set of Alternians: "The heroes chose to accept this bargain, and scratched their session."
- A little later, same conversation: "But in addition to losing their memories of everything that had happened before the scratch, there was another catch for the failed heroes. In the new reality, they would not serve as the heroes."
- And a final one from Scratch, probably the biggest of all, at the EOA5 flash, right before all the kids' plans come to a head and the universe is reset:
S u c k e r s.
- Lord English's first appearance:
YOU THERE. GIRL.
GIRL, QUIT ALL THIS SCURRYING AROUND.
DO YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN ESCAPE ME BEFORE I ARRIVE?
HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO OUTRUN ME
WHEN I AM ALREADY HERE?
- uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering gutsyGumshoe [GG] at 11:17
- In an otherwise silly and hilarious conversation with a 15-year-old drunk:
GG: I believe SOMEBODY doesn't want me to play.
GG: How else do you explain the recent attempts on my life?
- "The Page is dead. Our hope is lost."
- When John asks how long it will take him and Jade to cross the Yellow Yard and arrive in the new session:
GG: i would say
GG: if i keep our speed constant...
GG: we should arrive in about three years
- "You say it's all fair game now that the kingdom's under new management. The new boss ain't opposed to taking some shrewd tactical shortcuts."
- In a conversation with Dirk Strider, Roxy drops this conversational bomb, about her "upbringin"
TG: do u know how misrable it is for your bff to doubt you
TG: when you tell her your mom is dead
- In a dream bubble, Terezi has a chat with Vriska. Only to learn something unexpected.
GC: YOU SOUND R34LLY D1FF3R3NT
GC: WH4T H4PP3N3D TO YOU OUT H3R3?
AG: Sorry for the ruse.
AG: Though it isn't as far from the truth as it possi8ly could 8e, I am not who you think I am.
- And with this line, humanity's fate is made significantly less ambiguous:
TT: There are no humans either. They all went extinct.
TT: Roxy and I are the only ones left, as far as we know.
- Caliborn's "shitty twist":
uu: I ALREADY KILLED HER!!!!!
- The prelude to one of the most shocking revelations in Act 6.
UU: oh bUgger. this is so embarrassing to have to admit.
UU: i am sorry for saying things which may have reasonably led yoU to believe this.
UU: probably way too many things. u_u;
UU: bUt i am not actUally a troll.
- "But the fact that he's a slob was never exactly breaking news to anyone. Neither is the fact that you both share a body."
- Parodied while John and Jade are watching Con Air:
JOHN: i think i just realized something.
JOHN: THIS MOVIE FUCKING SUCKS!!!
- Kurloz' lines after he gets the codpiece from Meulin:
EXCELLENT WORK, MY MAGE
IT MUST BE DELIVERED TO THE BARD OF RAGE AT ONCE, SO THAT HE MAY CONTINUE OUR LORDS MIRTHFUL MOTHER FUCKIN WORK
LONG LIVE THE ANGEL OF DOUBLE DEATH
- Caliborn talks to Jake about his session, and eventually reveals that he has a new Juju. What is this, you ask?
GT: So whats this juju he gave you?
uu: THE THING IS. I UNDERSTAND HIM MORE NOW.
uu: BEFORE I THOUGHT HE WAS A CURSED VESSEL OF MISFORTUNE. WHICH SEEMED EERILY EMPTY TO ME.
uu: HE WAS HOLLOW. NOT YET FILLED WITH BAD JUJU.
uu: AND LOOKING IN HIS EYES NOW. I SEE. THAT I WAS RIGHT. ALMOST.
uu: HE IS EMPTY RIGHT NOW. BUT A JUJU FOLLOWS A LONG AND WINDING PATH ON ITS ETERNAL JOURNEY.
uu: AND HE WILL NOT BE EMPTY FOREVER.
uu: SOMEWHERE ALONG HIS JOURNEY.
uu: IN SOME WAY I DON'T UNDERSTAND YET.
uu: HE WILL STOP BEING EMPTY.
uu: AND HIS CURSE WILL COME TO LIFE.
uu: AND WHEREVER HE GOES. TO WHATEVER UNIVERSE OR PLANE OF REALITY.
uu: ALL WHO EXIST THERE. WILL EXPERIENCE NOTHING BUT MISERY AND DEATH.
uu: AND ALL THOSE ALONG THE WAY.
uu: WHO HE DEEMS WORTHY.
uu: OF ACCEPTING INTO HIS CUSTODY.
uu: IF THEY SHOULD DARE TO FONDLY GAZE.
uu: INTO HIS SPARKLING BABY BLUES.
uu: THEY WILL BE PEERING THROUGH THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WINDOWS.
uu: INTO MY HIDEOUS SOUL.
- Probably the weirdest Wham Line in the entirety of Homestuck follows the Trickster sequence.
GO BACK TO ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 1
- In a dreambubble, John asks Aradia what she really wants.
- The Troll's meteor is about to crash. How could it get any worse? Well...
- John Egbert's ring has gone missing.
- And then, we see its new bearer is not meant to be the clown who steals it, but a master nobody could see coming:
ARANEA: Rise, my 8ard.
- And THEN:
ARANEA: I'm going to take over this session.
ARANEA: And then I am going to make sure it never 8ears fruit.
- AND THEN:
- AND FUCKING THEN:
ARANEA:8ut the moment she wakes up, she will simply 8ecome possessed again.
ARANEA: Again, I am very sorry.
ARANEA: 8ut it must 8e done.
- And after all of the above, the most painful word in HS history:
- Keeping the above in mind, there's this:
- Dirk, to Aranea:
DIRK: If I can't get the ring off your finger,
DIRK: I'll rip the soul out of your body.
- Jane to Jake as the hope field dies:
JANE: Forgive me, Jake.
- Gamzee gets one right after Jake's death - not so much because of what he says, but how he says it (and the fact that he's saying it):
GAMZEE: PlEaSe StOp.
GAMZEE: YoU'rE mOtHeRfUcKiN...
GAMZEE: hUrTiNg Me. :o(
- Which is then followed up by...
- As Roxy and Rose finally talk:
- Jade, when talking about the stories that the alternate Calliope told her:
JADE: so she went on to tell another story
JADE: not one about your brother
JADE: but one about mine
CALLIOPE: it already soUnds like a mUch more pleasant story.
JADE: not exactly...
JADE: this is the story about how he died
- A little earlier than that, we find out how Jade knew Calliope; they conversed in a dream once. And...
JADE: you were a god tier!
- Shortly after, Jade drops another bombshell:
JADE: a transition to a story about MY brother... who was stuck in a doomed timeline too
JADE: i think ill mess it up if i try to match what she said word for word
JADE: she had a really fanciful way of putting things
CALLIOPE: there's no need to try to recite what she said.
CALLIOPE: jUst tell the story in yoUr own voice, as yoU have already been doing!
CALLIOPE: it will be more fUn that way.
JADE: so the bottom line was
JADE: almost all our friends had died
JADE: and johns only hope was to return to his planet, and attempt to complete his personal quest
- One of Terezi's last instructions to John:
KNOCK H3R OUT! YOU C4N'T L3T M3 K1LL H3R
- A bombshell at the end of A6A6I4:
JADE: we were never dead at all
JADE: weve been asleep!