"You know what it's like to go to sleep every night knowing you work for a bunch of psychotic killers, and you bastards are probably gonna end up killing me one day?! You know what it's like knowing you've ruined my life?! You know what it's like, you sons of bitches?! I'm tired of your crap! You commit evil, you're part of an evil system, and we're standing up against you! And the Republic is going to defeat you in the end!" — Alex Jones, channeling his inner Princess Leia
Texan radio host and Conspiracy Theorist, Alexander Emerick Jones is an anarchist/libertarian who purports that the elite is plotting to kill 80% of world population any minute now via vaccines, food, fluoride and pretty much everything, really. If he didn't exist, you'd have to invent him.He's also the guy who snuck into Bohemian Grove and took video, which he claims shows the world Elite about to sacrifice a baby to Moloch.
Artistic License-Critical Research Failure: Even though Atheism isn't a religion this still counts, he once claimed that atheists were funded by satanic cults, atheists don't believe in satan and theistic satanists aren't atheists. Not to mention, atheists aren't just one collective that can be funded.
He also claimed that homosexuality was created by the government
Let's face it, we could do this all day
Absurdism: Here's a drinking game for those who love drinking: take a shot or down your beer/cider/lager/whatever every time he says something stupid. You will be dead by the end of the video.
Ax-Crazy: Jones seems to believe that the majority of the New World Order qualifies as this. To the detractors who don't believe he's a liar, Jones himself qualifies as this, particularly with what he wants to DO to the NWO such as beat them to pieces against the pavement and start eating them.
Battle Cry: Loves screaming at the top of his lungs when fired up.
Cloud Cuckoolander: Seriously, the majority of his theories do not make sense, and any that do often end up clashing with ones that don't, or made more sense but now show a huge difference in the content and data presented.
Back in his public access days in Austin, he gave a similarly misinformed "review" of Deus Ex, a game that took more than a few cues from Jones and similar conspiracy theorists.
Critical Research Failure:invoked More or less the defining trope of Jones. One of his favorite tactics is to quote a speculative column stating one person's opinion speculating about the future, and citing it as fact of things which are already happening NOW. This of course is just a subcategory of his speciality: taking everything completely out of any semblance of context. Strangely equally acceptable to his critics.
He once showed a picture of a gigantic, torpedo-shaped, silver, solar-powered NWO subspace super-Zeppelin nearly a kilometer long, which dwarfed the Hindenburg. Except it was actually a picture of a unmanned high-speed police blimp in Ogden, Utah, one which is barely 15 feet long and a foot wide. You could have seen the remote control pilot in the same picture for scale had he not been cropped out of the image!
One of his more bizarre claims is that Pepsi is flavored with liquefied aborted fetuses. He somehow arrived at this conclusion from an article about an R&D firm employed by Pepsi which used human taste receptor cells in certain lab experiments. These were not obtained from fetuses and have nothing to do with the manufacturing of Pepsi.
Dystopia Justifies the Means: Alex all but namedrops this trope when discussing what he believes to be the final objective of the New World Order.
Eagleland: One of his catchphrases is "The answer to 1984 is 1776." According to him the conspiracy to create the new world order has existed since before the American Revolution and the founding fathers did the revolution to stop the new world order.
Enraged By Idiocy: Inverted, as he seems to get annoyed by things which make more sense than he claims. Played straight with his detractors.
Fat Idiot: To his detractors. It's also worth nothing that Alex Jones himself views Michael Moore as this, citing the "psychic obesity" that he has, as the chief reason he qualifies for this trope. If some of his guesses regarding the September 11 attacks offend you, he may or may not fall into Fat Bastard territory.
For the Evulz: The motivation of the New World Order according to Jones.
Gambit Roulette: The schemes that the New World Order enacts are heavily reliant on playing dice with the world.
Hypocrite: Alex Jones made a REALLY big deal over Glenn Beck being a great big "fake" because he's "obviously" faking all the tears he sheds on the air. Of course...this was before Jones's Up to Eleven super-blubber amid a big-time "Where are the real men?!" moan....
He also regularly uses government numbers to try to back up his claims while also stating that government numbers can not be trusted.
Known for ranting on the shallowness of actors and popular culture, while he regularly hangs out with Joe Rogan and Charlie fucking Sheen.
Identical Stranger: He looks a lot like Bill Hicks. This video postulates Bill faked his own death and is now Alex Jones and while YMMV on how true that is, they do share a resemblance.
Insane Troll Logic: Exactly how he concludes that some of the things he reports about are evidence of an evil conspiracy is befuddling. Even more befuddling is the fact that some people believe him.
A good example of this would be his belief that leftist political groups that are out to regulate the economy to prevent corporate influence are somehow in league with the same corporations they try to regulate. (Corporations with anti leftist political views mind you.)
I Shall Taunt You: He tries this on people, presumably so he can sue them if they react. Ironically, it's incredibly easy for HIM to be taunted.
Occam's Razor: A lot of his theories fall victim to this, particularly ones about the elite wanting to kill off 80% of world population. Why would the elite want to render their position meaningless, and even if they did have a reason what grounds would they have for keeping him alive?
His most recent whopper is claiming that the government deliberately sicced a freaking tornado on Oklahoma. Yes, this would be the same Oklahoma that sits smack dab in the middle of Tornado Alley. Note that this is nothing new for him- for years, he's been claiming that the government's been altering the weather with camoflaged solar-powered high-altitude super-Zeppelins, HAARP, chemtrails, mundane aircraft, etc.
Rape as Backstory: According to Alex, he was sexually assaulted by the TSA. It is a sad commentary on the state of the world that this is probably the most believable thing that has ever come out of his mouth.
"Rashomon"-Style: There are two distinct accounts of the "infiltration" of Bohemian Grove and their ceremony "The Cremation Of Care", as Jon Ronson was doing a piece on Alex Jones at the time. Alex's version, as noted at the page head, includes possible baby-sacrifice and deeply occult, satanic practices, and heavily implies that his life was at risk. Jon Ronson, meanwhile, saw a bunch of drunk Fortune 500 types watching a community-theatre level open-air performance of a pretty daft little playlet, followed by a fair few of the spectators peeing on trees because they couldn't be bothered to find a toilet...
Rated M for Manly: Jones seems to place a particular emphasis on his own masculinity. In one instance, he explains that his rage is what happens when he starts working out a lot, and goes on to talk about how he swam 2 miles and ate a giant steak a few days prior. In another instance, he contemplates buying a big car, and dressing up in cut off sleeves in order to counterbalance what he sees as the emasculating influence of members of the New World Order. Furthermore, he also has the tendency to talk about how tempted he is to beat up or even kill members of the N.W.O in order to protect his family.
Soft-Spoken Sadist: Seems to view Barack Obama in this light, if his recent "Obama Lecter" segment is anything to go by.
Smite Me, O Mighty Smiter: Once confessed to praying for the destruction of the entire Earth if it meant his enemies were killed in the process.
Smug Snake: His view on Bill Gates. Ironically, many of his detractors view him in the same way.
Stealth Parody: Possibly used against him in the rotoscoped film Waking Life. In it, he is shown yelling one of his monologues over a car loudspeaker, while the animation slowly increases his skin hue to brighter, darker shades of red. This could just be a simple exaggeration used in many pieces of animation, or a reference to the imprisoned psychopath who is shown in the same way earlier in the movie while he loudly and publicly devises the most harmful and painful way to kill the people who got him into prison in the first place.
Stupid Evil: According to Jones the New World Order wants to reduce world population to 500 million through imprecise methods and causing the world to collapse for no reason, which defeats the purpose of taking it over in the first place.
Troll: Both he and his detractors often view each other as this.
For what it's worth, the BBC's Andrew Neill said that after Jones knew he was no longer on the air following an interview on Neill's "Sunday Politics", he stopped with the angry talk instantly, saying it's just an act.
The petition to deport Piers Morgan was a successful attempt at trolling CNN, gun control advocates, and Piers Morgan.
Vocal Evolution: Back when he was hosting local radio shows in Texas, his voice was noticeably higher and less gravelly. According to Jones himself, years of screaming have resulted in the voice he has today.
We Are Struggling Together: An attempted collaboration with fellow conspiracy loony Jeff Rense resulted in a very vicious falling out between the two, mainly because both of them suspected the other of being a double agent for the 'other side'.
How about his belief that David Icke's "lizards rule the planet" theory was distracting from the NWO's real goal?
Following his ranty performance on Piers Morgan's CNN show, Glenn Beck said that Jones was "giving the left the perfect poster boy for their attempts to paint every logical conservativenote Presumably, Beck thinks he is one of these, and while conservative is inarguable, logical is at minimum debateable. as an extremist nut job." Jones then called Beck "that little piece of trash." Pass the Popcorn, anyone?