!!!Fiction
->No, that was actually Xorn's evil twin brother, possessed by the sentient mold Sublime, pretending to be me, pretending to be Xorn.
-->-- '''Magneto''', ''X-Men: Death Becomes Them'' ([[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL6J7FJmy1c watch]]), regarding his supposed death. [[note]]This ''actually happened'' in the comics.[[/note]]

->William Shakespeare did not exist. His plays were masterminded in 1589 by Francis Bacon, who used a Ouija board to enslave play-writing ghosts.
-->--'''Fact Sphere''', ''VideoGame/{{Portal 2}}''

->'''Darwin''': How come we can see you every day, but we need this to see [other ghosts]?\\
'''Carrie''': Because I was ''born'' a ghost! Duh!\\
'''Darwin''': How does ''that'' work?\\
'''Gumball''': Duh! *beat* Actually, I have no idea.
-->--''WesternAnimation/TheAmazingWorldOfGumball'', "Halloween"

->''Well, that answers that question, and raises so many others.''
-->--'''Grim''', ''WesternAnimation/TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy'', "Here Thar Be Dwarves"

->'''Cubert''': That's impossible. Nothing can go faster than the speed of light.\\
'''Farnsworth''': No, no, no, of course not. That's why scientists increased the speed of light in 2092.
-->-''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'', "A Clone of My Own"

!!!RealLife
->The Loch Ness Monster is a submarine. Driven by Bigfoot.
-->--'''Creator/BillHicks'''

->That's what a [[TropeNamer voodoo shark]] is -- when your story depends on something so moronic, that there's no way of explaining it without resorting to something that's ''equally'' stupid!
-->-- '''[[SciFiDebris Chuck Sonnenberg]]''', ''Opinionated Voyager Episode Guide'', "The Cloud"

->'''Rich:''' As Theodore Rex explained, [[PsychicDreamsForEveryone all dinosaurs are mildly psychic]] when it comes to other dinosaurs.\\
'''Josh:''' I'm really glad you went back to pick up that plot detail, because the movie wouldn't make a lick of sense without it.\\
'''Jack:''' Also, I don't want to brush over [[ARareSentence what Rich Evans has just said...]] ''(everyone guffaws)'' These are not just dinosaurs living in the future; ''they are psychic, talking dinosaurs.''\\
'''Rich:''' That concept has no payoff other than it's his only motivation to go on the case.
-->--''WebVideo/BestOfTheWorst'' on ''Film/TheodoreRex''

->'''Pat:''' Our mysterious whispering immortal and his band of merry men find Connor and other immortals strapped to these tables underground. He seeks out Connor, then--takes all their heads?! Wait, t-t-this is ''[[PlaceOfProtection holy ground]]'', right? HE CAN'T DO THAT!\\
'''Spoony:''' He just did.\\
'''Pat:''' ''(whining)'' But he ''can't!''\\
'''Spoony:''' ''(admiringly)'' You heard the man! He "[[HandWave doesn't care about the rules!]]"\\
'''Pat:''' That's not how it works! Are you sure it's holy ground??\\
'''Spoony:''' Well, it has to be; there's [[BadassPreacher monks with machine guns]] running around.\\
'''Pat:''' Ah, I guess you're right. That makes se--[[DoubleTake HUH???]]
-->--[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Noah Antwiler]] and PatTheNESPunk watch ''{{Franchise/Highlander}}: Endgame''

->Then we finally get an actual explanation for why the Federation is working with [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain our plastic surgery addicted villains]]: The Head-Staplers have the technology to harvest whatever the hell is in the rings, and the Federation doesn't. Since the planet is in Federation territory, a partnership was formed. We also learn that the harvesting will make the planet uninhabitable. And if the Head-Staplers just establish a colony of their own on the planet, it'll take ten years for the rings to begin to take effect. Is it just me, or is this script roughly 90% about plugging up all its own plot holes?
-->--''Film/TheAgonyBooth'' on ''Film/StarTrekInsurrection''

->It turns out their lead suspect is married to a guy who [[Creator/BillyConnolly Billy]] molested as a child, which I guess...explains his...psy...chic...link--I dunno, I dunno, I'm trying to make sense of it but I can't. ''"What the hell is going on with this psychic thing?"'' I don't know.\\\
No, seriously.\\\
''Why'' does he have a psychic link...to the ''husband''...of a boy...he molested as a child?\\\
I know he's a priest. But priests don't have telepathy...[-I don't think....so-]....[--please explain.--]
-->--'''{{WebVideo/MikeJ}}''' on ''Film/TheXFilesIWantToBelieve''

->'''Chris:''' Lex doesn’t even have any reason to not like Clark now. The only thing that made him a bad person was Lionel and Clark [[WoobieDestroyerOfWorlds being to dick to him]] for his whole life. But now he has [[MindWipe NO MEMORY OF ANYTHING]]. He should be a decent guy!\\
'''David''': Or a drooling invalid.\\
'''Chris''': They’ve seriously taken away any reason he had to be evil, and just end up making him evil anyway. Like, it would actually be better if we got a scene where he finds a letter to himself that’s just a picture of Clark that says '[[NoteToSelf THIS GUY SUCKS]]' to explain it.
-->--Chris Sims and David Uzumeri [[http://comicsalliance.com/recap-smallville-finale/ on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Finale")

->What this comic tries to do is convince everyone that Scrier is in fact a cult-like organization...[[MesACrowd All of the Scriers dress and look alike]], see, so whenever you saw Scrier appearing to mysteriously travel somewhere, it was really a different guy. Seriously. Totally. Even that time you saw him walk through motherfucking walls. That was just… [[SufficientlyAnalyzedMagic super-technology]]. Fucking hell, it’s like Marvel editorial wanted to solve the problem of a villain being convoluted and making no sense by seeing if they could get him to make even less sense.
-->--'''''Blog/ToplessRobot''''' [[http://www.toplessrobot.com/2008/11/the_13_dumbest_spiderman_storiesjust_from_the_clon.php on]] ''ComicBook/TheCloneSaga''

->'''LetsPlay/{{Slowbeef}}:''' See, I loved how they tried to explain things away from the first game, but ended up fucking things up more.
-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Retsupurae}}''' on ''[[VideoGame/TheTrappedTrilogy Escape]]''

->'''Q:''' Why did the Wailord dropped a boulder on Bubble's adoptive mother Swampert?\\
'''A:''' the boulder was attached to that Wailord's underbelly, like Barnicles, and in its leap over Mama Swampert, the boulder detached itself.
-->-- {{Sonichu}} Q&A

->''"I think you just dug the plothole even deeper"''
-->-- [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7625336/5/Prayer-Warriors-The-Evil-Gods-Part-One-COMMENTARY Commentary]] on ''Fanfic/ThePrayerWarriors'', in response to a belated parenthetical note saying that God told Jerry about TheMole.
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