Quotes / The Ace

Real Life

Every boy wants to be in his shoes, and every man wants to be in his missus.

— Ali G on David Beckham

Look at that smug lizard — he's practically visualizing his trophy case buckling under the weight of all those prospective awards. "Oh heavens, I don't know if I could accept another! The shelves are already frightfully overburdened. Okay, maybe just an Oscar..."

— DListed, "And The List Of Benedict Cumberbatch’s Award Nominations Just Keeps Growing"

What do you know, Slater bakes a perfect cake, and the girls, who've increasingly shown themselves to drop into fan-wafting vapour fits at any vaguely romantic deed, are positively simpering at how sensitive he is, because he's baked one fucking cake. Devastated by the failure of his latest plan, Zack calls himself a "hula hoop." Don't be so hard on yourself, buddy.

— Stuart Millard on Saved by the Bell ("Pinned to the Mat"), So Excited, So Scared

John Barrowman oozes charisma from every pore in his body and he's damn hot to boot. You should hate somebody who can act, dance, sing and is strikingly attractive but somehow he's extremely likable too. Git.

— Joe Ford

One of the big selling points for the 2006 Ultimate Editions was the addition of a commentary track from Roger Moore... The first part of the Rio segment is given to a story about an attack of kidney stones Moore suffered through. Scarily enough, he manages to make this fascinating and entertaining. Is there any topic he can talk about that doesn’t come off as interesting?

— The Agony Booth on Moonraker

Fiction

"Sanguinius. It should have been him. He has the vision and strength to carry us to victory, and the wisdom to rule once that victory is won. For all his aloof coolness, he alone has the Emperor's soul in his blood. Each of us carries part of our father within us, whether it is his hunger for battle, his psychic talent or his determination to succeed. Sanguinius holds it all. It should have been his..."

— Horus Lupercal, Horus Heresy

Prince Ali!
Mighty is he!
Ali Ababwa
Strong as ten regular men, definitely!
He faced the galloping hordes
A hundred bad guys with swords
Who sent those goons to their lords?
Why, Prince Ali!

— Aladdin, "Prince Ali"

The Monks of Cool, whose tiny and exclusive monastery is hidden in a really cool and laid-back valley in the lower Ramtops, have a passing-out test for a novice. He is taken into a room full of all types of clothing and asked: Yo, my son, which of these is the most stylish thing to wear? And the correct answer is: Hey, whatever I select.

— Lords and Ladies

"Still worshiping God? Last time I heard, He started worshiping me!"

— Lord Flashheart, Blackadder

Tycho: I've been reviewing engineering records and damage statistics.
Wes: While we've been maneuvering?
Tycho: Restraining myself so you could keep up with me left me plenty of time for intellectual pursuits. I also composed a symphony and drafted a plan to bring peace to the galaxy.

— Starfighters of Adumar

Nazi: Ah, "Ace" Rimmer. Might one inquire how you escaped your bonds?
"Ace" Rimmer (what a guy!): Just had to dislocate both shoulders, pop them behind my ears, and slip between the ropes. Of course, it's going to take major orthopedic surgery to put them back, but rest assured: That won't stop me from rescuing the princess.

— Red Dwarf

"Billy's dead and he still has a better chance of getting laid than I do."

— Dan, Without a Paddle

Morgan: Man, you ever have someone show up in your life, just make you look so damn small?
Chuck: Yeah, the... Look, there's always gonna be someone that's cooler or better looking or more athletic than us, but there's one thing we have that they don't.
Morgan: Well, I got a beard.

— Chuck

"I am very smart. Top three percent of my class at Osiris medicad, finished my residency in eight months. 'Gifted' is the term. So when I say that my kid sister makes me look like an idiot child, I want you to understand my full meaning. River... was a gift. There was nothing — science, art, theoretical physics, even dance — that didn't come to her as easily as breathing does to us."

— Simon Tam, Firefly

"Police Constable Nicholas Angel: born, schooled in London. Graduated Canterbury University in 1993 with a double first in Politics and Sociology. Attended Hendon College of Police Training and displayed great aptitude in field exercises, notably Urban Pacification and Riot Control. Academically excelled in theoretical coursework and final year examinations. Received the Baton of Honour, graduated with distinction into the Metropolitan Police Service and quickly established an effectiveness and popularity within the community...In 2001, he began active duty with the renowned SO19 Armed Response Unit and received a Bravery Award for efforts in the resolution of Operation Crackdown. In the last twelve months, he has received nine special commendations, achieved highest arrest record for any officer in the Met and sustained three injuries in the line of duty, most recently in December when wounded by a man dressed as Father Christmas."

— Unidentified Metropolitan Police Sergeant on Metropolitan Police Constable (later Sandford Police Sergeant) Nicholas Angel via voiceover, Hot Fuzz

"How can someone like this even exist? Ain't this against the rules or something?"

— Dallas Genoard's opinion on the existence of Claire Stanfield, Baccano!

Now, many and diverse were the magic virtues that were in Cuchulain that were in no one else in his day. Excellence of form, excellence of shape, excellence of build, excellence in swimming, excellence in horsemanship, excellence in chess and in draughts, excellence in battle, excellence in contest, excellence in single combat, excellence in reckoning, excellence in speech, excellence in counsel, excellence in bearing, excellence in laying waste and in plundering from the neighbouring border.

— The Cattle Raid of Cooley

Steve Rogers: Big man in a suit of armor. Take that away, and what are you?
Tony Stark: Ah, genius billionaire playboy philanthropist.

— The Avengers (2012)

"Hi, I'm Mami. I'm awesome, and I kick ass, and I'm probably better than you at everything."

— Meduka Meguca

"She's like, ridiculously good at everything."

— Dick on Barbara, Young Justice (2010)

"I don't know what it is exactly, but this guy really pisses me off. He's constantly trying to score points, and succeeding."

— Ragna the Bloodedge on Colonel Kagura Mutsuki, BlazBlue: Chronophantasma

"Gods above, %playername, is there naught ye can't turn yer 'and to? Ye must get tired o' bein' the bloody best at everythin'!"

— Baderon, Final Fantasy XIV, after you beat him at Triple Triad

"Not to flatter myself, but I have a handsome face, an intelligent mind, and an athletic body. On top of that, I seem to have a natural talent for anything and everything I try. This's why people refer to me as the all-mighty Sera-chan."

— Seravy, Akazukin Chacha

"Physical performance, swift thought, resistance to outside pressures, impeccable deductive reasoning. Your virtues are bested by few singularly, and none excel beyond you in all at once. You are an exceptional specimen of your species."

— Shadow Mitsuo to Yu Narukami, The Many Quirks of Investigation Teamery

'Cause no matter what scars you bear...
Whatever uniform you wear...
You can fight like a krogan, run like a leopard
But you'll never be better than Commander Shepard!

— Miracle of Sound, "Commander Shepard"

Adam Lefkoe: Connor, Brock Moxie. Is the hype real?
Connor Rogers: Look Lefkoe, my player comp is Patrick Mahomes mixed with the trickster god Loki.
Dan Orlovsky: My sources are saying that every other QB besides Brock Moxie is a low class idiot who hates football.

— Gridiron Heights: Draft Day 2021 Special

"I'm so good, I'm in the MLS and they still put me in this intro."

— Zlatan Ibrahimovic, The Champions (2018)

Computer read-out: Captain Elvis Brandenburg Kremmen. Born December 25, 1950. Height 6 foot 10. Physical attributes: Supreme Athlete, Concert Pianist, Concorde Pilot, Mountain Climber, Diplomat, Space Captain & Genius. IQ 498.

— Captain Kremmen of the Star Corps

"Firesong has Power. Firesong is too beautiful to be human. Firesong is worth admiring. But from a distance. He's not called Firesong for nothing — he breathes in the admiration and everything else around him. Fire can warm you from a distance, but it burns when you get too close to it."

— Princess Elspeth of Valdemar about Firesong K'treva, Winds of Change

"Well, if you must ask; I'm an intellectual who speaks more than 20 languages, my food is excellent, my art is deep, I'm a great lover who is sexy without being vulgar, I rule my kingdom with peace, and I ride a mean scooter."

— King Europe, Scandinavia and the World

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