Daffy Duck: How's this for a new team name: The Ducks!
Bugs Bunny: Please! What kind of Mickey Mouse organization would name their team The Ducks?
Vegeta: C'mon, Nappa, let's not forget why we're here.
Nappa: To insult people, Vegeta?
Vegeta: No, Nappa, not just to insult people...but to insult people more specifically.
"Fans, as Hollywood Hogan walks away and you look at forty thousand plus on hand, if you're even THINKING about changing the channel to our competition, fans, do not, because we understand that Mick Foley, who wrestled here one time as Cactus Jack, is gonna win their world title. Ha! That's gonna put some butts in the seats, heh."
"I can't bear to imagine what Elmer Fudd singing "Love Me Tender" must sound like. Oh wait, it'd probably sound a lot like Cyndi Lauper."
— Book of Ratings, "More Useless Crap We Get In the Mail"
"This plate is just about as good as any major god (audience laughs). Take that, organized religion, take it!"
''"It was a big year for 3D movies. “Toy Story”, “Despicable Me,”, “Tron”. Seems like everything this year was three-dimensional. Except the characters in “The Tourist.”
"Nothing for “Sex and the City 2″? No, I was sure the Golden Globe for special effects would go to the team that airbrushed that poster. Great job. Girls, we KNOW how old you are. I saw one of you in an episode of “Bonanza,” for [bleeped] sake."
— Ricky Gervais, hosting the 68th Golden Globe Awards.
"There is a scene in this movie where a penguin bites Dane Cook in the crotch. I'd like to find that penguin and buy it a drink."
— Richard Roeper on Good Luck Chuck.
"This book fills a much-needed gap."
Lorne Michaels: Of course Sarah (Jessica Parker)'s breasts are beautiful. I just don't want the audience to think you're sexist.
Nicolas Cage: Sexist? I'm not sexist! That's the last thing I am!
Lorne Michaels: All right, Nic. If you're going to talk about killer bods, I think you should mention... Sofia Coppola.
Nicolas Cage: (grabs Lorne) Hey! That's my cousin!"
Lorne Michaels: You see? I-I-I-I did that to make a point. You see, when you're talking about someone that's close to you it's different, isn't it?
Nicolas Cage: Oh... oh... oh you're right. Oh God! They must hate me! What am I going to do?
Lorne Michaels: Don't worry, you'll be fine.
Nicolas Cage: Well they-they-they probably think I'm the biggest jerk who's ever been on the show.
But eventually the changes did come back and it was getting too scary for me…scary and stupid. I mean, ugh, Space Jam, heeeellllooo! That movie was terrible! And don’t get me started on Baby Looney Tunes! Whose bright idea was it to turn everybody into babies?!? You can’t party with babies! I didn’t mind the Duck Dodgers one too much I guessed but things were getting a lot more dangerous for good ol’ Party Pony.
Sam: So, Mr. Williams, I'm also here on Freelance Police business.
Ash: Yeah, about what?
Sam: Would you happen to know anything about a book that had never been returned back to the local library in the depths of Hell?
Ash: No sir. None whatsoever.
Sam: Penned by pure evil?
Sam: Summoning great evils, that sort of thing?
Ash: Nuh uh.
Sam: Simply the among the nastiest, foulest tome ever to grace human understandings of literature doesn't ring a bell?
Ash: All right already, I'll toss that copy of (INSERT CURRENT CULTURALLY DISLIKED PIECE OF LITERATURE HERE) into the fire after this. Sheesh.
Sam: Another case wrapped up.
“Where'd you learn to cook, truck driving school?”
—Gourmet Guy, Paper Mario
"I feel like their hair is one big "top that!" to the guys who made YuGiOh".
"'Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records! Well I do. So fuck him and fuck you too."
— Eminem, "The Real Slim Shady"