— The infamous Sonic the Hedgehog drowning countdown
How is Indiana Jones such a wimp that he can't set foot in water more shallow than a kiddie pool?
Finally, a hero in a sandbox game that can justify the fact that he can't swim
I am Isildur, King of Gondor! With the hilt-shard of Narsil, I cut the One Ring from Sauron's finger during the siege of Mordor. Oh! I stepped in a creek and died.
Not in this game, Swimmer Dan! In this game, you drown.
I'm a Warrior Hero Adventurer Goddess who CAN'T SWIM, OKAY?!
— Skye of the Skittles promotional video game Darkened Skye
If only we had some minions who could swim... or float... or not drown quite so quickly...
Donít you know that you never learn to swim until the sequel?
— Comic Book Guy, The Simpsons Game
Water: My arch nemesis!
— Quark, Ratchet & Clank Future: A Crack In Time
Oh, that's just great! I can run at supersonic speeds but I can't even get out of a kid's swimming pool? What the hell has Sonic Team been smoking all these years?
You obviously haven't seen turians swim. It's a lot of flailing and splashing interrupted by occasional bouts of drowning.
— Garrus Vakarian, Mass Effect 3
They're turtles, for fuck's sake! They can't even swim!?
Bomberman can't swim!
Seine: The sea and I have a mutual disliking.
Sonic: Ah, okay.
Seine: It keeps trying to drown me, the bugger.
Sonic: Oh, I know how ya feel. I just sink right to the bottom.
(Sonic looks annoyed.)
Seine: Least you can swim your way out, right?
Seine: Ouch. Similar deal. I can swim, in theory, but anything above my head...
(Seine does a rock-sinking motion.)
Sonic: Yup. Story o' my life when it comes to water.
Seine: Damn. Well, thank goodness for the solid land here.
— Two protagonists talking about a characteristic they share, We Are Our Avatars
Kirby: So where do we go from here? Do we just swim?
Sonic: I can't swim! I need my floatie- er, I mean, a floatation device.
Ganondorf: You don't need a floatation device when you're underwater.
Sonic: ...I don't like him. He keeps outwitting me.
— Super Paper Mario X, Chapter 19
"HAO CAN NOT SWIM—GAME OVER"
— Mystery Quest