Quotes: Spanner in the Works
"What happens to your prophecy if I shoot you first?"
"Reality and human nature, sir, are very important things, and oh how they sometimes bring down the most perspicacious calculations!"
"Congratulations. You've just invented negligent regicide."
To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him."
To be fair, it was a great plan until it involved Fighter.
"There's one thing you never put in a trap if you're smart. If you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow there's one thing you never ever put in a trap: Me."
"My plan was perfect but there was one thing I overlooked, one factor I failed to calculate. He's a dumbass and there's no accounting for dumbass-ness."
"Rufus, this is a precision instrument, incredibly complex. Better mess with everything."
"You always overthink things. The reason your plans keep failing is not because your enemies are geniuses. It's because they are idiots. A plan is only truly foolproof if you consider The Fool. Oh, and checkmate."
"That little goon! Even a chimp knows better than to pick the losing side! This ruins my plan to wrap the Game up on Day 1! I'll need to work up another strategy... adjust for the longer term. Good thing I never make mistakes..."
"Hey, I totally just gummed up your subplot. Now let me gloat about it in front of you so you can easily fix it."
Natasha: Boris, I thought you said this plan was foolproof.
Foolproof yes, idiotproof, no.
"I'm here to screw up your plan."
"The best swordsman in the world doesn't need to fear the second best swordsman in the world; no, the person for him to be afraid of is some ignorant antagonist who has never had a sword in his hand before; he doesn't know the thing he ought to do, and so the expert isn't prepared for him; he does the thing he ought not to do, and often it catches the expert out and ends him on the spot."
"The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference... in the world."
"You know, when you said 'Noel Vermillion' a few moments ago, I damn near peed myself. All of my plans - POOF! instantly undone. All thanks to you."
"Awww, did I throw a 'Wrench' into your plans!? Hahahaha!"
Xigbar: You're not supposed to be here!
Promises to keep. I'll always be there to get my friends back. What, bad timing? You had your perfect little script, but you kinda forgot to write the sequel. Now, let's find out what happens!
You are the NARRATIVE. You were simply plodding on in your inimitable, Hussian fashion, waiting to get to the more interesting 5X SHOWDOWN COMBO on the ROOFTOP, which promises to be a 6X SHOWDOWN COMBO, thanks to the UNBISECTION of ERIDAN AMPORA, when suddenly, you were thrown COMPLETELY OFF-TRACK by the addition of ONE (1) EXTREMELY ENRAGED RAINBOW DRINKER, who has jumped into the middle of this very heartwrenching and pathos-ridden scene, taken TEREZI'S DRAGON CANE right out of Terezi's hands, and BOPPED Vriska Serket over the head with it.
That was unexpected. You are DERAILED, in a superbly metatextual example of anthropomorphization.