Quotes / Snake Oil Salesman

We'll drink, a drink, a drink,
To Lily the Pink, the Pink, the Pink,
The saviour of the human race.
For she invented Medicinal Compound,
Most efficacious in ev'ry case.
Lily the Pink, Scaffold

"Sell your tonics elsewhere, miracle man!"
The Engineer upon dominating a Medic

By definition (I begin), alternative medicine (I continue) has either not been proved to work or been proved not to work. Do you know what they call alternative medicine that's been proved to work? Medicine.