Quotes / Shooting Superman

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    Comic Books 

Oh, you're kidding me. You do not open up your huge war machine to shoot at the bulletproof robot.
Atomic Robo, Robo and Goliath

That's for wasting ammo!
Max Damage while punching a guy who just tried to shoot him, Irredeemable

Oh... You shouldn't have tried shooting, either! My name is Superman... and bullets don't bother me a whole lot! But you've noticed that, huh?

Simeon: Move, you mugs! Shoot him!
Superman: You're simple, Simeon! If flames can't hurt me — What good are bullets going to do?
Crook 1: They guy ain't human!
Crook 2: The slugs bounce offa him like popcorn!

Y'know, I remember watching the old Superman TV series with George Reeves, and the bad guys would always shoot at Superman, when he showed up. I used to ask myself, why? They know it's not going to hurt him, at most, it'll piss him off, so why shoot at him? You know what it comes down to? The bad guys are always stupid. Dirt-stick-stone stupid.
Pyre, Rising Stars

I hate thinking of the fortune in ammunition thugs like you have wasted on me over the years!

Bullets bounce off you. But where do they go next?
Director Chase to Supergirl, Supergirl (Rebirth) #1

    Fan Works 

Kind of hard to land a hit when you are intangible!
Ben Tennyson to True Assassin, Fate Stay Night: Ultimate Master

"Honestly, why do you people do that?" she demanded of the mugger, exasperation coloring her voice. "You must be the tenth loser to try that. Do you really think pistol whipping me is going to do anything when the bullets bounce off?"
Asuka Langley Sohryu (a. k. a. Supergirl), Superwomen of Eva 2: Lone Heir of Krypton, chapter 8

The lead squad that entered the access tunnels into Central Dogma first must have thought it was their lucky day when they saw a young kid in expensive looking purple and blue clothing and a walking stick just stroll right into their crosshairs. They opened fire without giving it a second thought.
The kid just turned and smirked at them as he failed to die. For a few seconds the firing continued until the soldiers noticed that there was a wall forming in front of him of... of...
Of bullets...

    Film - Live-Action 

Mooks: (hose down the scary metal colossus for fifteen seconds)
(beat)
Tony Stark: My turn.

    Literature 

Would lasers or tactical nuclear weapons have any effect? Cthulhu's so damn big he'd make a grizzly bear look like a kitten embryo.
Chris, Nightmare's Disciple by Joseph S. Pulver, Sr.

    Live-Action TV 

It's called deductive reasoning. If a rocket launcher couldn't stop me... what's a little peashooter gonna do?

I'm sick of having to buy new clothes.
Luke Cage again

Look at this. The bad guys shoot Superman a dozen times, see the bullets bounce off, so they throw their guns at him. It's like they can't kill him so they think they'll give him a really bad bruise.
Al Bundy, Married... with Children, "Sleepless in Chicago"

See, now, if the bullets don't work, right... why the punching? Never understood that.

Listen friend, guns aren't gonna solve your problems.

    Web Original 

In spite of the fact that tanks have repeatedly been shown to have no more effect on Godzilla than a shampoo and creme rinse, they still get trotted out with every new monster attack, rolling shakily over the canvas landscape and firing their little sparklers. The reason for this, I'm guessing, is political. If the prime minister fails to send the tanks, in the next election his opponent will run ads saying "In the last Godzilla attack, the incumbent failed to send out the fakey-looking plastic tanks to protect us. My opponent is obviously soft on giant monsters!"

Rorschach: (after several gunshots) You don't die, do you?
Deadpool: Nope!

Silly bitch, yo' weapons cannot harm me! Don't you know who the fuck I am?! I'M THE JUGGERNAUT!

If you are a policeman, bank guard, or night watchman, and your first shot bounces off of the intruder's chest, try shooting other areas of the intruder's body, like their face, groin, etc. If this also fails, do not waste the rest of your ammo on him/her/it, or risk your neck in hand-to-hand combat; instead, fall back and observe.

So Slater tries to shoot the guy, but apparently bullets are just like Milk Duds being thrown at him.

Player: Die, Kayaba!
(Kayaba opens an admin console and paralyzes him mid-lunge)
Kayaba: Y-ya see, this right here is just a perfect little microcosm of the last two years. This fucking mastermind here, not two minutes ago, saw you try the exact same thing to no effect. Yet, by some Herculean leap in logic that we mere mortals can never hope to comprehend, he figured it'd totally work out if he did it! Now I trust that the rest of you good people have enough pattern recognition not to follow in this man's footsteps - oh, wait, no, that's goldfish! I'm thinking of goldfish.

Were they not briefed?
Unskippable on the poor, stupid saps who tried to attack Wolverine with guns

    Western Animation 

Cop 1: This is hopeless! We might as well be throwing candy corn at them!
Cop 2: So what do you want to do? Give them the city?
Justice Leaguenote 

Downpour: Nobody harms my sister. Nobody!
(blasts Aquaman with a wave of water, to no effect)
Aquaman: King of the Seas, remember?

I should warn you, it's been done.
Superman to a mook about to shoot him, Superman: The Animated Series, "My Girl"

    Real Life 

"Superman!" the criminals would say. This was the signal for Superman to put his hands on his hips so the criminals could shoot their revolvers at his chest, an effort that always caused Superman to adopt a bemused expression because, as a native of Krypton with special powers, he knew that the criminals were shooting blanks.


http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Quotes/ShootingSuperman