Quotes: She Cleans Up Nicely

Wally: I'm thinking of growing a beard to disguise the fact I have no chin. Then I'll wear loose sweaters to disguise the fact I have no waist.
Alice: Maybe you should get a Sherlock Holmes outfit to disguise the fact you have no clue?
Dilbert

John: Shayera, I wanted to...JUDAS PRIEST!
Shayera: Problem?
John: No, no, it's just...I've, uh, never seen you in a dress before.

Have you always been that pretty?
Locke to Celes at the Opera House, Final Fantasy VI

See? You're a pig, Barney's a pig, Larry's a pig... we're all pigs! Except for one difference: Once in a while, we can crawl out of the slop, hose ourselves off and act like human beings.
Moe Szyslak to Homer Simpson, The Simpsons

Carter: (to Donny) Before I put on this dress, you couldn't even remember my name.

Then they do another "Where Are They Now" segment with Francine — who, if you don't remember, was Justin Credible's "Manager" or "valet" or whatever you want to call her — who used to be a real crack ho-lookin' chick. And I noted that Francine is way hotter now than she was in ECW! She is MILF-y like crazy, man! OH yeah!

Francine said, basically, that she's retired, she doesn't want anything to do with wrestling. I'm sure she's really happy she's not here; they had a really cute baby. Seriously, Francine shutting up and saying she wanted nothing to do with ECW anymore was probably the highlight of the show. She was really good!
Noah Antwiler on TNA HardCORE Justice

Tony Bennett makes every event a little more peppy and/or zesty. And he decided his date for the evening would be his current friend and singing partner Lady Gaga, which is always a risky move, because you never know what that bitch will show up in.

Thankfully, Gaga showed up showered and not wearing an outfit made out of trash stolen from the dumpster behind a fire-damaged Hobby Lobby. Which is to say she looks…good? I know, start donating all your old winter clothes to the people of Hell, because they clearly need them. She looks like a real old school gold digger. You know, the type of gold digger who confidently clips the tags off her gown before wearing it out of the house, because they know they’re going to see a return on their investment.

And the “Hiya daddy, can I have some money for the craps table?” look on her face is a nice extra touch. Very authentic.