Quotes / Sarcasm Mode

Oh yeah, like I'm sarcastic.
Malcolm, Malcolm in the Middle

Fry: But won't that change history?
Professor: Ohhh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. "I'm-My-Own-Grandpa"! Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!
Futurama, "Roswell, that Ends Well"

GLaDOS: Unless you have a plan for building some supercomputer parts in a big hurry, this place isn't going to be safe much longer. Good job on that, by the way. beep Sarcasm Sphere self-Test complete.

GLaDOS: Sorry about the mess. I've really let the place go since you've killed me. By the way, thanks for that!
Aperture Announcer: Sarcasm self-test complete.
GLaDOS: Oh, good. That's back online.

"Oooo, a sarcasm detector! Well, that's a really useful invention!"
Comic Book Guy, The Simpsons. A moment later, the sarcasm detector explodes.

Domor: "If you can't be anything but sarcastic, Feygor, shut the feth up!"
Feygor: "I'm not being sarcastic."
Squad: "Shut the feth up!"
Feygor: "It's this thing! This thing!" (indicates his augmetic voice-box) "It makes me sound fething sarcastic even when I'm not!"
Brostin: "To be fair, you're sarcastic most of the time anyway."
Feygor: "Not always."
Yael: "How can we tell when you're not being sarcastic?"
Mktag: "Maybe he could hold up a hand when he's actually being sarcastic for real. Like a signal."
Feygor: "Oh, that's a good idea."
(beat, everyone looks at Feygor)
Feygor: (raises his hand reluctantly)

Brandy: Okay, is it possible to work even slower?
Ed: You know, I haven't given it that much thought but I reckon it just might be possible.
Brandy: I was totally being sarcastic
Ed: Oh well it shames me to admit it Miss Brandy but I don't traffic in sarcasm too much so I don't really tend to recognize it when it is out there. You could give me a heads up like "Hey sarcastic comment coming". Just let me know then I'll have my eyes open. I mean come on, a sarcastic otter? That'll be unnatural.

Lana: Wait, here's an idea-you talk louder, and maybe they'll come to us.
Archer: We'd lose the element of surprise, Lana.
Lana: That was sarcasm!
Archer: No way? Really? Because so was that, just now.

Oh that was sarcasm but I forgot to inflect. This sounds way more like sarcasm. Inflection is sooo interesting.

Homer: Oh, look at me! I'm making people happy! I'm the Magical Man from Happy-Land, in a gumdrop house on Lollipop Lane! [leaves, slamming the door. beat. pokes his head back in] By the way, I was being sarcastic! [slams door]
Marge: Well, duh.

"Sorry, did that hurt? / That "sorry" was sarcasm / I am not sorry."
Zer0, Borderlands 2

Dean: Are you serious?
Death: No, I'm being incredibly sarcastic.
Supernatural, "Appointment in Samarra"

Giles: Alright, I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the 12th Century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show.
Buffy: Okay, at this point you're abusing sarcasm.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Never Kill A Boy On The First Date"

Black Mage: [After another instance of Sarcasm-Blind] We're going to have a code. When I stab you in the ear, that means I'm being sarcastic. Got it?
Red Mage: I have reservations about that, vis-a-vis the stabbing and also my ear.
Black Mage: I'll take that under advisement. [Stabs Red Mage in the ear]