Quotes: Really 700 Years Old

Milo: Wait a minute, wait a minute! Whoa, back up! What're you telling me, that you remember because you were there? That-that's impossible, that would make you, you know, eighty-five, eighty-eight... hundred years old!
Kida: Yes?
Milo: Oh... Well... Uh, hey, pshh... Lookin' good.

Anya: Gimme a beer.
Bartender: I.D.
Anya: I'm 1,120 years old! Just gimme a frickin' beer!
Bartender: I.D.
Anya: (sighs) Gimme a Coke.

Ozzy: Hi. You can just call me "Ozzy". *She nods, waving hello*
GG: ...like the musician? Sweet.
Ozzy: Sort of, 'though I've used this name longer than he has.
GG: ...considering your age, I highly doubt that.
Ozzy: *Ozzy grins a bit* How old do you think I am, anyway?
GG: (thinking) Don't say anything wrong don't say anything wrong don't say anything wrong...
GG: ...uh...forty-nine.
GG: (thinking) Oh GG, you sly devil you.
Ozzy: Actually I'll be six hundred this year, and...I don't look forty-nine! Do I?
GG: Well, you certainly look like a forty-nine year old who de-aged by twenty-five years recently. And six hundred? That's neat.
Ozzy: Yeah, that's eternal youth for you.
Asagi: (Lucky bitch...) You always had that "eternal youth" thing?
GG:...doesn't that get incredibly boring after the first few hundred years?
Ozzy: Since my early twenties, so... 1430-something. And yeah, it does get boring, hence the whole traveling thing.

Rose: When you say nine hundred years -
Ninth Doctor: That's my age.
Rose: You're nine hundred years old?
Doctor: Yeah.
Rose: My mum was right. That is one hell of an age gap.
- Doctor Who, "Aliens of London"

Astrid: You look good for nine-hundred-and-three.
The Tenth Doctor: You should see me in the mornings.
Astrid (without missing a beat): Okay.
Doctor Who, "Voyage of the Damned"

Shepard: Just how old are you, exactly?
Liara: I hate to admit it, but I am only a hundred and six.
Ashley: Damn! I hope I look that good when I'm your age.

Reverend Theo: The margin of error in your guess at your own age is bigger than the age of my whole species.
Corporal Vog: Like I said, I am having trouble understanding your perspective.

"Feferi, how long have you been here?"
The little Troll stops playing, deep in thought, you assume. Had she lost track of time? Happens to the best of us. When she lifts her head, you meet her white eyes and—
She is old.
She is older than you imagined. She has been in these bubbles for a very, very long time. And she has been a little girl for longer.
Doctor Who, in a crossover fic with Homestuck

If you're really as old as you say... shouldn't you already be in college ?
— The Viridian Saga's Andromeda Slate, starting a pattern of Completely Missing the Point...

LCdr. Jadzia Dax: So let me get this straight: No sleep. No food. No women. No wonder you're so angry. After thirty or forty years of that I'd be angry too.
Virak'kara: No Jem'Hadar has ever lived thirty years.
Jadzia: How old are you?
Virak'kara: I am eight.
Jadzia: I would have guessed at least fifteen.
Virak'kara: Few Jem'Hadar live that long. If we reach twenty, we are considered Honored Elders. How old are you?
Jadzia: I stopped counting at three hundred.
Virak'kara: (stunned) You don't look it.
Jadzia: Thank you.

Wait, go back! You mean to tell me it's Really 700 Years Old? I thought it was only twenty!