"500 channels and there ain't much on tonight
But reality shows about some folks' so-called lives
A pretty girl cries 'cause she don't get a rose
But she'll find love next year on her own show
And they call that real"
—James Wesley, "Real"
"Armed & Famous took celebrities, mostly the bad kind, and gave them jobs as police officers. This wasn't that crazy an idea when it was 600 pounds of aikido action star, but when it's La Toya Jackson, that's irresponsibly insane."
"I’m an unashamed lover of Big Brother... It’s taking a while for things to get interesting this season, mainly because everyone’s still in that first heady rush of tiptoey politeness and they’ve yet to splinter into two eternally warring factions, like the Hatfields and McCoys if they’d been fighting over who gets to cover their bare tits with their hands for the most money in Nuts magazine instead of cowboy gold."