Quotes / Rant-Inducing Slight

Whoa...boy I apologize. My hormones are going nuts! Now please.. if you would... Get the (elephant trumpeting) out of my way. I mean how many times do I have to gotta (fire alarm) write "ice cream" on this (rubber ducky squeak) list before someone gets his (horse neigh) in gear and brings home some (owl hoot) ice cream? Maybe I should get a STEAK KNIFE, and etch it in your mother(plunger thrust) forehead! HOW HARD CAN IT (squeaky toy) BE? ICE-MOTHER(drum hit)-CREAM! I guess that's the price I pay for living with two (dial tone) MORONS!
"Pregnant" Meatwad, to Master Shake and Frylock, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, "Gee Whiz"

"I've heard that you're taking a stand against that FILTHY DEVIL, Godwin! You're going to BASH him up good?! This is absolutely wonderful news! That insalubrious blackguard Godwin is truly the very SOUL of evil incarnate! His PESTIFEROUS being spreads evil to everything it TOUCHES! Stormfist USED to be mine, I tell you! It RIGHTFULLY belongs to the House of Aethelbald! He TOOK it from me, he TRICKED everyone! FILTHY, FILTHY, DEVIL! No QUARTER or MERCY for the FILTHY DEVIL! BASH HIS EXECRABLEMALEFICENT RANCOROUSDAMNABLEFACE! DEVIL! PERFIDIOUSMISERABLEODIOUSWRESTCH!! GEETAAAAARRRGH!!!"
Egbert Aethelbald in Suikoden V during the recruitment scene

"I... apologize for that outrage. It was... childish, and immature... I just get... a little peeved when I see one of my childhood icons carrying... *deep breath* A BAT CREDIT CARD, YOU BASTARDS!! I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU!! ALL OF YOU WILL DIE, YOU'LL GET THE GAS!!!"

"OK, I've just about had my FILL of riddle-asking, quest-assigning, insult-throwing, pun-hurling, hostage-taking, iron-mongering, smart-arsed fools, freaks, and felons that continually test my will, mettle, strength, intelligence, and most of all, patience! If you've got a straight answer ANYWHERE in that bent little head of yours, I want to hear it pretty damn quick or I'm going to take a large blunt object roughly the size of Elminster AND his hat, and stuff it lengthwise into a crevice of your being so seldom seen that even the denizens of the nine hells themselves wouldn't touch it with a twenty-foot rusty halberd! Have I MADE myself perfectly CLEAR?!"
— The Player Character from Baldur's Gate, after receiving one too many mysterious answers

Arin: I appreciate it, but look what we're dealing with, man!
Jon: Heh, Arin-
Arin: You gotta draw the line somewhere!
Jon: Arin we-
Arin: YOU GOT TO DRAW THE FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND, DUDE.
Jon: Arin we got to-
Arin: YOU GOT TO MAKE A STATEMENT! YOU GOT TO LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY "What am I willing to put up with today?... NOT FUCKING THIS!

Lois: Raymond? I just noticed that this background is blue; do I have time to change into my grey pashmina?
Raymond: ... GET BACK IN YOUR PLACE!!! WE'RE TAKING THIS DAMN PICTURE!!!

Where is the Mr Pibb? I told your secretary to pack Mr. Pibb. It's the only coke I like. Goddamn Brenda exploding like a water balloon! Worms driving my friends around like they're goddamn skin-cars! People are spitting acid at me, turning you into cottage cheese! And now THERE'S NO FUCKIN'! GOD! DAMN! MR. PIBB!
— Mayor Macready, Slither

Carla: [Disgusted and self-righteous] I can't believe you, Bambi!
Turk: She is so right, man.
Elliot: What are you thinking?!
Cox: [Obnoxiously] Ohhhhh, Rin-Tin-Tin-Tin-Tin-Tin-Tin—
J.D: [Exploding] SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP AND SHUT UP, OKAY?!?!?! Who are you people to give me advice about anything?! All you do is just bitch about your relationships all day long! [To Cox] And you know what? Glare all you want, Big Dog, because I'm not afraid of you, okay. [Whiny] "Oh no, Jordan's only paying attention to the baby!" That must be so hard for Dr. "LOOK AT MEEEEE!", isn't it? "Look at meeeeeee!"
[Cox glares indignantly but has no response]
J.D: [To Turk and Carla] And you two! What, you're arguing since you got engaged? Wow, you're probably the first couple that's ever done that ever. It can't be that you're just scared, is it?
[Carla and Turk look embarrassed and slightly ashamed]
J.D: [To Elliot] And you... you know, let's just forget for one second that a month ago you told me you couldn't be in a relationship with anyone. Because for me, it's actually fun to watch you sabotage a relationship from the outside. It really is. [Elliot seethes but stays silent] Honestly? The only thing that gives me comfort, you guys, is that while I'm sitting at home staring at the ceiling just wishing I had someone to talk to is that none of you idiots realise how lucky you are. [Storms off]
Scrubs

[picking up the phone] Hello? Yes. Of course. What? He assured me we have his vote... What!? Recanted? Who got to him? Yes, it matters! If we... if we do not have his vote, then we are in stalemate. We do nothing - again! More people will die... and worse.
[Beat]
What? Compromise?
[Beat]
COMPROMISE!? CAZZO! CHE CAZZO! Do not tell me compromise! Tell it to the dead! Do you remember the last time? The bodies? The ones still... alive... the singing... oh, that terrible singing... Committee? "Evaluate the situation?" By the time we agree on a special committee, they will be dead. Again! Your committee can dig a mass grave and throw in all of their bones, and do you know what the tombstone will say? "Killed! By! Compromise!"
Arturo Castiglione, The Secret World

Issues? Our mother was killed by a missile that Stark made when it hit our house during the war. My brother and I were trapped in the rubble for three days, staring at the Stark Industries logo. Staring at the machine, the name of the man that had killed our only family. We were refugees, children that no one wanted. Who would take in a filthy Roma? Roma just steal, Roma just lie, never trust a Roma, everyone knows that. We were beaten and kicked out of foster homes. We grew up on the streets! We had no one to care for us, no one to love us. People spit at our feet! Stark brought war down on our heads, destroyed our cities and killed our people. He made our lives miserable. And you say, you say that I have 'issues'? I did not have issues with Stark. I wanted him dead!
Wanda Maximoff/Scarlet Witch to Clint Barton/Hawkeye, Age of Ultron: Redux

Iíll be honest with you, I might not be the best person to ask. Iím Buckyís best friend. Itís like asking a wife to testify against her husband. You canít help but remember all the ways that person was good for you and all the reasons why you cared about them. And that can mess with your judgment. But Iíll try and stick with the facts: the fact is that a man has been brainwashed for decades by an organization that we know has a history of murder, espionage, discrimination, persecution, and God knows how many other crimes. Iíd also like you to consider Barnesí distinguished military career up until his supposed death while in action. If the kind of person like Barnes, with his venerated, untarnished career, is suddenly a killer for an organization like HYDRA, one that we know uses brainwashing techniques, wouldnít that make you think twice about persecuting him at the very least? And why - Iím sorry, why are we even discussing the death penalty? Why is this still a thing in our country, when - when we claim to be better than others while doing the same things that they do, thatís where we start to lose our way. I think Buck - that Barnes, is a convenient patsy for the media. Heís the big, scary assassin that everyone can blame. Itís why Natasha Romanoff is still on trial after being the one to release the HYDRA files in the first place and risking her life repeatedly for the sake of this country: sheís a convenient patsy. The government and the public likes to have a boogeyman to hate. If the government was truly interested in being fair, they would finish decoding and sorting all of the released HYDRA files before starting a manhunt. And whereís the manhunt for Brock Rumlow? He publicly stated that he was for HYDRA, and he doesnít even get a blip on the radar. Barnes shouldnít be Public Enemy #1. The people at the top who gave him his orders and snuck into SHIELD through the back door are the ones we should be going after. (realizes heís gone on a bit of a rant and that everyone looks a bit taken aback) Iím sorry, itís just... this hits a bit close to home, yíknow?
Steve Rogers/Captain America to an interviewer, Captain America: Ghosts of HYDRA


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