Quotes / Odd Job Gods

Now Issek of the Jug, whom Fafhrd chose to serve, was once of the most lowly and unsuccessful of the gods, godlets rather, in Lankhmar. ... He is not to be confused with Issek the Armless, Issek of the Burnt Legs, Flayed Issek, or any other of the numerous and colorfully mutilated divinities of that name. Indeed, his unpopularity may have been due in part to the fact that the manner of his death - racking - was not deemed particularly spectacular.

1625 things Mr. Welch can no longer do during an RPG: "#3: There is no Gnomish god of heavy artillery."
RPG.net poster, whose name has been forgotten: "There is a Catholic patron saint though." (It's St. Barbara, incidentally.)
RPG.net [NSFW][Photoshop]Motivational Posters first thread

It used to be much worse. Back in ancient Greece and Rome they had gods all over the place, and it was no fun at all being a mortal, as you know if you ever read any myths:
"One day two young lovers, Vector and Prolix, were walking in a garden. This angered Bruno, the god of gardens, so he turned Vector into a toad. Saddened, Prolix picked up her lover and squeezed him to her bosom, which caused him to secrete a toad secretion upon her garment. This angered Vito, the god of fabric, who turned Prolix into an exceedingly unattractive insect. Saddened, Vector hopped to his lover, which angered Denise, who was the goddess of municipal water supply and just happened to be in the neighborhood, so she hit them both with a rock."

I'm the god of unpaid debts. Popstar prayed real hard this morning. Time for you fuckers to pay up.
Wei Shen, Sleeping Dogs, in a sarcastic take on the trope