Quotes / No Budget

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    Film — Live-Action 

We ain't got no budget! (NO BUDGET!)
No craft service, man! (NO BUDGET!)
We don't take no "notes"! (NO BUDGET!)
No fucking call sheets, yo! (NO BUDGET!)
We ain't recouping shit! (NO BUDGET!)
Yeah, we got a starting day for real! (NO BUDGET!)
Yo, this picture's a go! (NO BUDGET!)
Yeah, we gonna turn Hollywood out! (NO BUDGET!)"
No Budget, from the Cecil B. Demented soundtrack.

"Huh. It's a big mansion. It's funny how I only ever see the two of you. It's almost like the studio couldn't afford another X-Man."


That is my favorite, um, 'common elements' of Doctor Whos' eighties vision of the fascist future, is the buggies. 'Cause they're studio sets, and they can't do cars. They do them in The Happiness Patrol, as well. It's the iconic transport of 80s Doctor Who fascists!

So Kirk, Spock, and McCoy get taken to the ship's brig, which is just a room where they're preventing from escape by powerful fluorescent light bulbs.

OK, now don't get me wrong, I love practical effects; but really? Are we supposed to believe that those're some kinda laser bars or somethin'? Fucking really? You couldn't do some kind of effect here? Jesus Christ, where did all the money in the budget go to, catering for James Doohan?

    Professional Wrestling 
"Chairs were not in the budget Dalton! We've got the table, I brought the title, but chairs were simply not in the budget. I apologize."
Bobby Fish, Road To Best In The World, 6/10/2016


There is no shop in London Town
Except two flats that are painted brown
But think of all the cash they've saved
The physical budget's impeccably shaved

    Web Original 

The infamous wobbly walls (often mentioned in classic Who but rarely seen) make an appearance as the Doctor attempts to scale the silo... the floppy tentacled Kroll is one of the most toe-curlingly awful Doctor Who sequences ever and guess whose mother-in-law was around the last time this story had an airing? "Doctor Who is good I tell you!" I could be heard objecting to her mirth.

What few actual sets they use are barely serviceable blank walls. There's barely even any furniture! Most of Sheridan's half of the episode is filmed in the middle of a completely black room occupied only with a pair of small chairs, because the Minbari are "minimalists." Uh huh.

True the budget is about half of what the first one was but maybe things have calmed down and they had more time to get the production they truly wanted. They have…actors in this movie so they have that going for them. What director did they get? John Putch? Never heard of him. What has he done? American Pie Presents: The Book of Love.

We’re doomed.
Miles Antwiler on Atlas Shrugged Part II: The Strike

Taker and the Ortons partook in a game of Dueling Mannequins, with each party scaring the other with caskets — caskets occupied by wax dummies so lifelike, you’d swear they were just the real Undertaker…and the real Ortons… Okay, okay, so the dummies really were simply the Undertaker and the Ortons pretending to be dummies. I just find it depressing that the company’s special effects budget had apparently shrunken since 1996; they couldn’t even afford a Casket Cam in 2005.

Do yourself a favor and get into these clips from Lifetime’s Brittany Murphy biopic. This shit is so low-budget that I think it might be a prank. I was waiting for Jimmy Kimmel, no scratch that — Seth Meyers to walk out. This is Lifetime’s attempt to grab ahold of that Sharknado-type viral success, right? No one can act, that girl looks not a thing like the much-missed Murphy, and holy shite, THAT WIG ON 'ALICIA SILVERSTONE.' Did someone from The Craft cast a curse on that girl? What in hell does she have going on under there that required that on her head? I think it’s still attached to whatever animal died for it. And that animal has peed many times and it’s dried. They couldn’t afford an actual blonde?
Michael K., "The Blohan biopic just put a quarter in this one’s raggedy coffee cup, shook its head and thought 'there but for the grace of God...' as it went about its day."

M.A.N.T.I.S. never achieved very much glamor during its single season, even after they started introducing real super-villains. In the end rather than retire from being M.A.N.T.I.S. or have Hawkins reveal his identity, they killed the character off.

Using an invisible dinosaur.

What you see there is the actual death scene of the protagonist, fighting an invisible dinosaur. Other heroes have come to far more ignoble ends, but rarely on network primetime.

David: This is convenient, because when Superman rescues the train, they can just take a simple flying-forward-over-a-greenscreen shot and overlay it over stock traveling-through-subway-tunnel footage. Four thousand dollars saved for Globus!
Chris: Also Superman can stop a subway train just by shorting out the third rail, rather than actually physically using his strength so stop it. That’s another five grand!
David: Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve saved the cocaine mountain budget!
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri on Superman IV: The Quest for Peace

    Real Life 

You know when I used to come through a door in Doctor Who very slowly and peer around, it wasn't because I wanted to come through a door like that. If I'd come through a door quickly, the door would've come off in my hand. So one had to stealthily creep around because the sets were very, very delicate.
Tom Baker in 1984