He was very hard of hearing
He was dull and domineering
Misogynist, cantankerous and vain
But all that’s now forgotten once he took his final breath
Yes, even pricks turn into top blokes after death!
It's not how they live that counts, but how we rewrite the book
When it comes to truth, it's best to use restraint
It pays to throw away the facts and have a rose-coloured look
When he dies, Martin Bryant will look a saint!
Remember all will be forgotten once we take our final breeeeeeeeeath...
Yes, even pervert motherfuckers, even rampant child abusers, even local Baghdad looters, even baby bunny rooters,
Even reckless drunken drivers, even rodent sperm-imbibers, even violent poofter-bashers, even public penis-flashers,
Even rotting corpse molesters even human piss ingesters even tiny kitten-kickers even anal finger-lickers,
EVEN ANNA BLOODY COREN
YES, EVEN SHE
"τὸν τεθνηκóτα μὴ κακολογεῖν" (Let only good be spoken of the dead). note
— Chilon of Sparta, one of the Seven Sages of Greece (circa 600 B.C.)
When someone dies thou shalt no longer be under obligation to cry saying 'he'll be missed' knowing good and well that he was an asshole.
— "Posdnuos, Thou Shalt Always Kill" (De La Soul version)
Death makes the worst of men instantly respectable, you know.
— Francis Cheviot, The Reluctant Widow
I was told only to speak good of the dead, Joan Crawford is dead....good!
— Bette Davis (attributed)
Newspaper: And thereby, our conclusion is that Councilman Hunzinker is a pin-headed old demagogue.
Opus: Excuse me, [Milo]... I thought you'd like to know that Councilman Hunzinker just kicked the bucket.
(Milo crosses out "is a pin-headed old demagogue" and rewrites:)
Newspaper: Hunzinker was a sharp-witted elder statesman.
Mako!? You mean that guy I made fun of in the TMNT review and got horribly ridiculed for it? [continues nervously] Well, I'm...uh... sure there'll be nothing wrong with his character in this movie... In fact, I'm sure that it will be absolutely delightful. With no flaws at all. [holds hand in prayer in the image of Mako while angelic chorus plays]
"However you felt about the man, whatever your opinions are, I believe we, as a people, should make a rule that once you die… whatever derisive nickname that we used for you, it dies with you. So can we stop calling him 'Jacko' now? After you die, can a brother get a 'Mr. Jackson'?"
Yosuke: Hey guys, you'll never believe this. I just got back from the crime scene. The victim this time...it was King Moron.
Chie: Hey, um...I know he was a jerk 'n all but...now that he's dead...should we show some respect and actually call him Mr. Morooka?
Yukiko: No. I hope the worms eat his heart first.