Testing in three! two! one!
I reject your reality and substitute my own!
Am I...missing...an eyebrow?
*picks up small fragment of cement truck* Well,
there's your problem!
Failure is always an option on Mythbusters.
If I had any dignity, that would have been humiliating!
[To Camera]Why? Because secretly, you've always wondered. And that's why we're here.
I Love...Consistent...DATA! HAHAHAHA!
* Points to M1 Garand round* This kills you.
* Points to .50 cal round
* This kills you and everyone else in the room!
Today's forecast: (pops an umbrella open) Seventy percent chance...of science!
(after being slapped by Jamie) Holy bleeping bleepity bleep!
(in a terrible French accent) Today on Mythbusters, we have my two favorite things: red meat and high explosives!
(Thermite-coated cloth suddenly burns fast and brightly) Dude-eronomy!
(First water-walking test; to Jamie) Come, Silent Walrus! Let us storm the castle! I will put on my safety gear.
(As their model Hindenburg accidentally catches on fire) Man, these things are ALWAYS catching on fire! ...That is the textbook definition of "irony," kids.
(Holding up two bottles of explosive ingredients with Pixellation
over their names) This ingredient is made of Blur. Ha. And this has some Blur too. Blur is very dangerous; you don't want to mix Blur with Blur.
(On taking candy from a baby) These babies are crafty. I think we can outsmart them.
This is the point in the day, which we've come to many times, where we start to go "What else do we have that's flammable in the truck?"
I just had another one of those "what the hell are we doing?" moments
(After shooting a car-mounted paintball machine gun) You SO wish you were me right now.
(After confirming the Drain Disaster myth, standing behind a manhole cover with a "2" on it) Well, if there's one thing everyone knows they can expect from a sewer explosion, it's that number two is gonna fly into the air.
The difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.
(Wearing a auto racing fire suit and carrying a climbing axe) Here comes chaos!
(As Jamie is polishing a homemade wrecking ball in the background) Jamie wire-brushes his balls every morning.
Our Death Ray doesn't seem to be working. I'm standing right in it... and I'm not dead yet.
It always brightens my mood when we get to break out the sledgehammer.
It was the lard that did it.
What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen somebody work on a car with an axe?
[standing in front of a washing machine filled with ball bearings rattling very
noisily, shouting at the top of his lungs] So far my neighbors think it's cool to be next to the Mythbusters.
[points at the dryer] That could change.
Steak in a dryer with ball bearings actually did really tenderize the meat. Of course, there were problems because it, like, tenderized the dryer itself and it fell apart but, you know, if you get over that you've got a tender steak.
Don't open your mouth [in that pond]. It's like an au jus of duck poop.
[In reference to the soda-can firing rig balanced on his shoulder] I call it my little pop gun.
Sometimes... You just need a little extra lubrication.
[After using two tanks to pull apart a couple of interlaced phone books] I just wanted to make a phone call.
It's like your ass is one with the target.
Adam: Gimme a countdown.
Jamie: [While Adam is digging a hole in the background] Adam doesn't know it yet, but he's digging his own grave.
Adam: What was that?
Nothing! Keep digging!
[About to detonate an explosive] Bu-bye!
These will explode, these will melt, this will kill you — this is great.
am six months pregnant, I will be wearing a bulletproof vest. Protecting for two, you see.
Our blast zone is set up way, way, way over there. But we've decided to come really, really far back to make sure all Mythbusters, big and tiny [points to very pregnant abdomen)], are perfectly safe.
Do we want to talk about why I just got hit in the head with a thumb?
If we're wrong about this, we're going to have a really bad day.
High-explosives and electricity. Wooo!
Kari: What does it mean when [crocodiles] hiss?
When they hiss, they feel a little threatened, cause you're getting a little bit too close to them, cause they're kind of unhappy with your presence right now.
(Kari's eyes get very large
) They're unhappy?
(Screaming at the top of her lungs at a straw brush held against a rotating clay pot) YOU CRAZY KILLER!
(While Tory is trying to separate a bullet from its shell... with his teeth) Your mom is in my head right now, and she's telling you: Don't do that.
I also learned something about myself. And that is that when in danger, I will use a co-worker as a human shield.
Now remember: The safety word is "Run!"
OK, but instead of a bathtub, we should do a TOILET! You know, like how you used to throw cherry bombs down the toilet in high school. Tory:
Yeah, well, I wouldn't know anything about that; I was too busy studying chemistry.
) Kari: ...What is this? Opposite land?
It's really strange when you have a job where you spend all day doing things your parents told you never to do.
(After observing that Tory has outfitted the hood of his car with a harpoon) Your idea of a "safe stop" is to shank me?
(After Adam gets a severe electric shock) Did you feel God?
Now what would be a really good pump-action shotgun to go with my outfit?
[sniffing cigarette-smoke saturated shirt] I smell like... Bingo Night in some... French foreign cinema kind of... old lady bar.
Remember the Hwacha? Well, we're going to Hwacha them. So watch-a this!
[VERY distressed] What I want to know... is why I... am a grown woman... and boys are still trying to make me eat bugs!
[after busting the myth that girls don't pass gas] Can I take the microphone out of my butt now?
I promised my mother I wouldn't do the dangerous stuff anymore... sorry, mom.
My toast always lands butter side up.
(to Tory) Are we ever going to have an episode where you don't hurt yourself?
(Blueprint Room setup for Antigravity)
Grant: Have you ever thought it would be cool to control gravity?
Kari: (putting a "Pyramid Power" model on her head) Wooo, great, another one of these!
Grant: OK, look, there's a lot of credible research going on all around the world. There's a Russian scientist doing a lot of cool things with superconductors, NASA, the European space agency... are all interested.
Kari: Yeah, that just pretty much proves that there's nutjobs and fruitcakes all the way to the top.
You know, watching Kari dig this hole and knowing that I'm going to be buried up to my neck in it, it's kind of like watching her dig my grave... I hope I don't regret saying that.
OK, all set to go here. Glasses are set up, car's ready, paramedics are.....nowhere to be found.
I see injuries in my future.
Tory: Frank, why are you standing so far away?
So the next question is, why am I standing so close?
Let's play charades!
(Grant begins to act out charades, but breaks down laughing) Tory:
Two words. Sounds like? Fire extinguisher in a fire:
(standing in a bull ring, wearing a red jumpsuit) I'm starting to think this is a bad idea.
You know you're onto something when your
small-scale involves dropping cars from a crane!
It's getting dangerous here on MythBusters. And that's how we like it.
Apparently, I am close to the size of the ballistics dummy, therefore I have to go and shop... for a bra. Once again, making my family proud.
Hey, it's working...what the heck?
Black powder and duct tape? That doesn't sound like science, that sounds like a family reunion!
(after Kari screams "TORY!" at another piece of straw held against a rotating clay pot) That was a good one, Kari! Now I know what it would be like to be married to you.
We're popping popcorn with lasers!
Am I excited? You better believe I'm excited! We just made a giant moose out of rubber, and now we're going to crash cars into it!
Adam: LET'S PILLAGE! Tory:
I don't know if that's legal in California…
Jaws episode, Adam obtained two of the actual yellow barrels used in the film) Adam:
So he (the owner)
says the only things we can't do are burn 'em, blow 'em up, or lose 'em. Tory:
Has he watched the show?
(Playing on the doomed piano) and we're gonna light it on fire!
If I had a nickel for every time I've been kicked in the nuts on this show, I could retire.
You know what they say: Safe exploding is good exploding.
I love those two words: "Bomb robot".
(Adam is working on a grappling hook, and is firing it at the wall. He misses repeatedly) Now all we have to do is work on the 'hitting the wall' part.
[To Tory] This next myth is really fun! It involves you hurting yourself.
[To Tory] You've had stupider ideas.
Don't forget to do the science!
And now for something completely gratuitous.
Leather: It's great for fashion; not so good for artillery.
Decapitation hazard, everybody.
Let's egg him on until he hurts himself. That's always fun.
(seconds later, Tory tries a bicycle jump and faceplants on asphalt)
[Presenting a car's driveshaft to Jamie] For you: One nice, greasy part. Guaranteed to get your shirt dirty.
The Narrator (Robert Lee)
Adam has to act like this... It's in his contract.
...Adam puts out the Mythbuster Yodel.
3 copies of Adam sing "FIRE IN THE HOLE!" in sequence to form a chord.
Okay, Adam, now you're just really taking the barbershop thing too far. Just press the detonation button, will ya?
Oblivious to all warnings, Grant and Tory set the scene, then get dressed for success: sombreros, boots, and bandoliers - a desperately clichéd battle looms between the tragically uncool, the undeniably hot, and these two idiots.
(After Grant made a bet that he'd eat his multi-tool pouch if his safety system fails) Coming up next, we learn how Grant likes his multi-tool pouch prepared!
Sgt. J.D. Nelson
Grant: (discussing how to explode a piano)
What do you have for us? JD:
What I think you need is the "MythBusters Concerto in C-4
(upon seeing a bucket filled with 1 million matchheads) You guys have way too much time on your hands.