Mary Jo Pehl: I saw this same scene in a Lifetime movie about a woman trying to escape an abusive relationship.
Bill Corbet: Which movie was that?
Mary Jo Pehl: All of them, actually.
Roger: Oh, my God, look what's on Lifetime! Daphne Zuniga in Spooning with Anger.
Roger: So?! That's our favorite spousal abuse movie of all time. We gave it even higher marks than Valerie Bertinelli's classic, Please, Kevin. Not in the Face.
TV: "I'm sorry dinner was late! I love you so much!"
Roger: Why do they stay, Steve? Why do they stay?
— American Dad!, A.T. The Abusive Terrestrial
Actress: Doctor, you said you were going to cure my cancer, but all you did was rape me. I'm starting to think I don't have cancer at all.
Actor: Well, you're right. About the rape part. But you really do have cancer.
Announcer: Valerie Bertinelli in, Men Are Horrible And Will Hurt You Because This Is Lifetime.
Boyfriend: “He did it.”
(He points at someone who is, in fact, the bad guy. She's shocked.)
Girlfriend: “But he hasn’t even said anything yet; how did you know?”
Boyfriend: “This is a Lifetime movie, and he has a penis.”