Quotes: Killer Game Master
"Your bodies will remain undiscovered for (roll roll roll) 82 centuries!"''
Dave: Damn! I rolled a one.
: A one? Excellent! That gives me a chance to use the new Critical Mass rolls I just picked up.
You ever get the feeling that the universe is a vast, impersonal emptiness that exists only to hurt you? Red Mage:
Yes. It's how we know the DM is doing his job.
As you can see I soon realized that Psycho Dave ran a game in roughly the same way that Warwick Davis in the film Leprechaun granted wishes. Everything you said your character did was scrutinized for some way to screw you over and the dice ruled all. He was the only guy I know who used a random monster encounter chart for Call of Cthulhu. You haven't lived until you've had a character go mad because he saw a nightgaunt sitting in a restroom stall reading a copy of the Necronomicon.
"'Freelic jumps into the pit to gather the treasure!' Jay Jay nerdily proclaims, 'How much does Freelic get?' ...The camera switches to Daniel, whose expression is priceless. It's the look a DM gets when an otherwise sharp player does what could be the most blitheringly stupid, disasterous thing possible to his campaign and it's going to take him a minute to fully process a description of how dead Freelic is.
Oh dear God, his face reads, there aren't enough clerics in the world to rez this guy."
"This brings up the first issue I have with D&D: There is no hope for you if you exist in this world. Nothing can be trusted. If the game master wants to kill you, you're dead."
You will note that the blade of a guillotine is also broad.
An evil GM gives the party fights they can't win and should run away from.
A killer GM gives the party fights they can't win and can't run away from.
— Source Unknown