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Quotes: "Join the Army," They Said
Oh sergeant, was this the adventure you meant,
When I put my name down on the line?
All your talk of computers, of sunshine and skis,
I'm asking you, sergeant, where's mine?

"Never met a German
Never even seen one
Read it on the newsstand that day
That the tanks are rolling
Next thing I remember is that I'm walking in the army
Following instructions, it isn't very charming"
Brazilian Girls', "Never Met A German"

He said, "Son,
Have you seen the world?
Well, what would you say
If I said that you could?
Just carry this gun, you'll even get paid."
I said, "That sounds pretty good."
Hero of War, Rise Against

"'Join the army,' they said!
'See the world,' they said!
I'd rather be sailing."
Human Footman, Warcraft II

"'Join the army,' they said.
'It'll be fun,' they said...."
American Engineer, Company of Heroes

"I joined the army to see the galaxy, but all I got was eight-hour watches of listening to weird politicians making appointments to—"
Zavirk, Legacy of the Force: Sacrifice

Join the army! See the world! Meet interesting people! And shoot them.
Unknown

We're in the Army now, We're not behind a plow
We'll never get rich digging a ditch
We're in the Army now.
Abe Lyemon and the Californians - We're in the Army Now

"'Join the Marines, see the galaxy.' Hell."
— Alliance Marine survivor on Nepmos, Mass Effect

"Son, be a colonist", is what Dad said to me
"It's a cushy life, and you'll get alien real esate for free"
So I talked to the recruiter, to see if this was so
He smiled at me... the nicest smile... and said "Kid, don't you know?"
A colonist's job is easy, a colonist's wage is high
A colonist's pension plan would make a civil servant cry
There's never any danger, there's always lots of fun
And as for job security, it's better than a nun's

[spoken:]Kid, I'd like you to meet somebody. His OFFICIAL title is
"Commander", but I'd like you to think of him as more of a Social
Coordinator.

[Chorus:]
If I ever get back home again
If I ever get back home again
If I ever get back home again
That recruiter's gonna die.

— The Deadlock Song, by Paul Kwinn.

A vacation in a foreign land
Uncle Sam does the best he can
You're in the army now oh oh you're in the army now
Now you remember what the draftman said
"Nothing to do all day but stay in bed"
You're in the army now oh oh you're in the army now
You'll be the hero of the neighbourhood
Nobody knows that you're left for good
you're in the army now oh oh you're in the army now
Smiling faces as you wait to land
But once you get there no one gives a damn
You're in the army now oh oh you're in the army now

"God, I knew I should have applied for that job at Beacon. But nooooo, be a criminal everyone said, it's a thrill they said. Idiots..." the woman muttered, melting back into the shadows that somehow covered only her face.
"God, I knew I should have applied for that job at Schnee Dust Corporation. But nooooo, go to Beacon they said, be a Huntress they said, you're giving back to the community. Idiots..." Glynda muttered as she continued to dig through the mainframe.

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