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Quotes: J Bridge
"I think maturity is basically the ability to know when you're being an ass."
— JBridge on maturity

"Something is only obscene if you believe it to be obscene. I simply choose not to believe in obscenity."
— JBridge on obscenity

"Fuckpiss."
— JBridge on many things.

"You can use it for anything, man!"
— JBridge on the previous quote.

"A fountain of useless and mostly disgusting information."
— JBridge's best friend on JBridge's mind.

"FATAL doesn't seem to be as sexualized as the initial review claims. They just found the naughty bits and put them in the limelight. The real problem of the game is the realism. The designers tried to make the most realistic game possible, and they succeeded."
JBridge...at first.

"It's always good to maintain a healthy level of paranoia."

"Anything can be lethal. You can kill somebody with a loofah if you get it going fast enough."

"And that people, is how you mindrape someone."
— JBridge while on the TV Tropes Vent channel.

Starbound2: I tried to register for spring semester classes, but the server is down. D:
JBridge: I assume you're in college?
Starbound2: Yes.
JBridge: It's everybody's first experience with bureaucracy.
JBridge: It's like a vaccine.

Yotsuba: the best anti-depressant in the world.

Really, one of the best times to be on Vent is when the wiki's down, because everybody's on Vent complaining about the wiki being down.

JBridge: I am very good at coming up with things that people have already come up with.
William: heh
JBridge: I think I once thought of Communism on the toilet.
William: lol
JBridge: Actually, that's probably how all political theories come about.
JBridge: Some great politician taking a dump, and has an idea.
JBridge: Everybody gets their best ideas on the can.
JBridge: Either that, or in the shower.
William: yeah
JBridge: It's weird.

JBridge: YOU CAN NOT GROUND MOE.
JBridge: MOE SHALL FLOAT THROUGH THE AIR LIKE A VERY CUTE BIRD.

I think the reason why Schrödinger's so sexy that the human brain isn't sure whether he's a chick or not, and chooses whichever option seems sexier.

My mind is like an mp3 player now!
— On the IOSYS song Overdrive.

(Note: We were talking about the OS-tans based off Windows for this next quote.)

JBridge [Troper]: You using it?
Momizi Inubashiri: would make me feel beter if i was useing windows 7 lol
JBridge [Troper]: Then torrent it!
Momizi Inubashiri: yah i needa set it up
Momizi Inubashiri: hell no =o
JBridge [Troper]: Why not?
Momizi Inubashiri: idk
JBridge [Troper]: If you don't want to torrent it, I have a disc.
Momizi Inubashiri: but dont you need a code or something for it?
JBridge [Troper]: Yes.
JBridge [Troper]: I have a keygen.
Momizi Inubashiri: =o
Momizi Inubashiri: but
Momizi Inubashiri: i rather wait till windows 7 is more
Momizi Inubashiri: umm
Momizi Inubashiri: used i gess is the word
JBridge [Troper]: It is.
Momizi Inubashiri: so more things a conpatable
JBridge [Troper]: Mature, you mean?
JBridge [Troper]: Nanami isn't a loli!
Momizi Inubashiri: i know
JBridge [Troper]: That's ME!
Momizi Inubashiri: O-o
JBridge [Troper]: ME= Mellenium Edition

Joel: By the way, is there anything you want me to burn for you?
Momizi Inubashiri: burn?
Joel: I have a ton of DVDs.
Momizi Inubashiri: afk for a sec
Joel: OK.
Momizi Inubashiri: back
Joel: Well?
Joel: Do you want something?
Momizi Inubashiri: let me think
Momizi Inubashiri: =p
Joel: La Blue Girl, maybe?
Momizi Inubashiri: whats that?
Momizi Inubashiri: btw like my avatar?
Momizi Inubashiri: =o
Joel: it's about a ninja clan that has a contract with demons.
Joel: The locket that binds the contract gets stolen, and they have to get it back.
Momizi Inubashiri: ohh
Momizi Inubashiri: nty
Momizi Inubashiri: im not into movies atm
Momizi Inubashiri: =/
Joel: It's an anime.
Momizi Inubashiri: ohh
Joel: Also, it's about NINJAS!
Momizi Inubashiri: yah an anime about ninjas never seen that befor lol
Joel: It's a comedy.
Momizi Inubashiri: ok heres the list
Momizi Inubashiri: if it has any of this i DO NOT WANT lol
Momizi Inubashiri: is there...blood>
Momizi Inubashiri: like alot
Joel: Not at Quentin Tarentino levels, no.
Momizi Inubashiri: umm
Momizi Inubashiri: romance?
Joel: Not really.
Momizi Inubashiri: umm
Momizi Inubashiri: well knowing you...
Momizi Inubashiri: porn?
Joel: DAMMIT.
Momizi Inubashiri: HA
Momizi Inubashiri: i knew it
Momizi Inubashiri: hell no =p

"The interesting thing about voting in California is that around here you don't vote for the guy that'll do the best job. You vote for the guy that'll be the most entertaining."

"If you don't get a particular bit of symbolism, odds are it's a penis."

JBridge: That reminds me of something.
Fusionman: Oh sweet god.

"Boredom can lead to great and often meaningless things."

Fusionman: Please remention what futanari is.
JBridge: Dickgirls.
Fusionman: Huh?
JBridge: Girls.
JBridge: With.
JBridge: Dicks.
Fusionman: Those are men Joel.
Fusionman: They are called MEN.

"I don't rape my computers- I make love to them."

"If a guy firing his MP5 at a range is ametuer porn, Future Weapons is the badly acted "professional" porn that uses the same actors for every video."

"Inspired by Fanime, I had a thought just now. Cosplay is like cake; it's better when it's homemade."

"Science and booze are a very dangerous combination."

"Fuck Hobbes and his theories."
— from one of JBridge's essays for school

"IllFlower: JBridge just knows these things. Don't ask why, because it's more information than you'll ever need. Or want, really."
IllFlower on #yackfest

"SAN is my dump stat."

IllFlower: JBridge, you continue to constantly reshape my image of you. Now I have a feeling that you're actually a stereotypical crazy cat lady.

"Thought of the day: A debate only ends when both sides are convinced that they have emerged victorious."

«Multiplayer Halo is like Mario Kart. You keep getting killed, but you don't care because it's too funny.»

I swear, I want to go up to PETA's headquarters with a lawn chair and viciously eat KFC at them.

We keep them (cats) because they are amusing, and they keep us for precisely the same reason.

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