IPPA: Please speak your name as it appears on your current federal identity card, document number G24L8.
Joe: I'm not sure if...
IPPA: You have entered the name Not Sure. Is this correct, Not Sure?
Joe: No, it's not correct.
IPPA: Thank you. Not is correct. Is Sure correct?
Joe: No, it's not. My name is Joe...
IPPA: You've already confirmed your first name is Not. Please confirm your last name, Sure.
Joe: My... My last name is not Sure.
IPPA: Thank you, Not Sure.
Joe: No. What I mean is my name is Joe...
IPPA: Confirmation is complete. Please wait while I tattoo your new identity on your arm.
- The Identity Processing Program of America gives Joe a new name.
"I like money."
— Frito Pendejo