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Basically, if your hackers are mostly hip young DJs and tattoo artists who all cribbed their sense of style from the halfway point between My Little Pony and Pinhead from Hellraiser, and have been so-obviously-workshopped to oblivion that they might as well be snapping their fingers and referring to authority figures as 'daddy-o', then you are already showing your ignorance, 'cause most hackers are fat, greasy shit-minglers with terrible beards, posting Google Street View images of the houses of people who think we should have to pay money to watch TV shows.
I know that no matter where we live or how old we are, people are still doing their best to categorize everyone into John Hughes 80s movie archetypes, and this entire Nintendo thing is a dent in image control that's going to be hard to come back from. I don't want any of you dorks thinking you can call me to come over and hit you with cardboard swords, so for 3 months, all my articles are going to be about sports and bar fights. Then it's a week of moody poetry, and finally a bunch of pictures of me in my prom tiara. I'll keep you guessing until I finally let you know exactly which category's lunch table I sit at. I know you're thinking 'heartbreaking rebel,' but you're wrong. Wise janitor. I'm the wise janitor.
— Seanbaby, "Pointless Powerups"
This is how Lucas rolls. Seriously. A black jacket and Blues Brothers shades. Simply, utterly awesome. I don't remember, but I bet when I saw this as a kid I wished I could be just half as cool as this kid looks. Look at him. He just exudes cool, doesn't he? He knows he's the ultimate gamer—talent on loan from God—and he's living the life of a Utah maharajah, feasting on Ding-Dongs fed to him by scantily-clad gamer groupies who pray daily that just a whit of his talent might somehow osmose into them. Lucas is the fucking man. You know what? I still wish I was this guy. I could very well be gay for Lucas.
'Sorry, nobody down here but the FBI’s most unwanted!' When somebody describes a man as an ‘Oxford educated psychologist’ I get terrible visions of a pretentious, upper class know-it all. One out of three ain't bad. Actually, Mulder is nothing like I imagined and David Duchovny chooses to make this socially awkward, brilliant man every bit as embarrassing as he can possibly be. I want to point that out now because much later in the show's run (around season seven) Duchovny would toss away this geeky image and walk around with a stylish long coat, cool shades and perfect hair and basically lose everything that was ever appealing about the character. But at this point, he is willing to look as beaten and as pathetic as Chris Carter’s script portrays him and that is a great point in which to meet him. He is in no way the typical male lead and it’s very appealing to root for this guy and his cause.
We also get the obligatory geek-pandering characters in scientists Fitz and Simmons (Elizabeth Henstridge and Iain De Caestecker). They’re your standard-issue techie geniuses who can whip up advanced weaponry and cure alien diseases in less than an hour. They’re cute, they’re dorky, they’re British... and that’s about it. Frankly, I’m still not sure which one is Fitz and which one is Simmons.
When it came out, I read a brilliant takedown of the widely accepted, but wholly false idea that [Joss] Whedon’s good at writing for strong female characters, or geeky “Hey, they’re just like us!” everyman nerds. It noted how his casting is no less shallow than the GQ casting of a Michael Bay. Look at the IMDB page of the stoner character. Straight off the catwalk. Oh, but he’s got a t-shirt and a bong, and a voice like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo — NERD!
Listen, pencilneck, it's cool to say you're a nerd, but it's still not cool to be a nerd. So seriously, bro, stay the fuck out of our focus group-approved marketing video! I mean video.