"Evildoers just don't respect the snacktime of others." —Captain Crandall, Teamo Supremo
"As you well know, Isaac, I enjoy pain. It's like a good Chinese dinner, you know, with the sweet and the sour. Expanding on that analogy, I will smile with delight - that's the sweet - as you scream for your fucking life - of course, that's the sour." —Papa Caesar, The House of the Dead: OVERKILL
"I ate the soul of a monk once. It tasted like chocolate." —Richard the Warlock, Looking for Group
"You went on and on about how sweet the candy was, then told me not to put it in my mouth, and then got mad at me when I did!" "If by 'candy' you mean 'Ancient Forbidden Evil,' then YES, I told you not to put it in your mouth!" — The Amazing Screw-On Head
"Join the Dark Side - we have cookies" — T-shirt slogan
"There is one thing every vegetarian has to face every goddamn day that they're eating vegetables: Eggplant tastes like eggplant, but meat tastes like murder, and murder tastes pretty goddamn good!" — Denis Leary
"Princess Peach's sweet voice will soon be the bread that makes the sandwich of Cackletta's desires! And this battle shall be the delicious mustard on that bread! The mustard of your doom!" — Fawful, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga
"All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening." — Alexander Woollcott, "The Knock at the Stage Door"