"You see, Nerd, nobody makes you play these games but yourself, so you're your own damn nightmare."
— Freddy Krueger, The Angry Video Game Nerd
You have to go out of your way to watch me on TV. I'm easy to avoid. When people say to me, 'You're on TV too much,' I reply, 'Are you saving the batteries on your remote? There are 200 channels - watch something else!' TV reviewers have the worst job in the world because they're the only people who have to watch TV they don't like. In the same way, you'd have to make a pretty big mistake to buy £25 tickets for you and your missus and think, 'I really hate this guy!' That's a major error - it's more than just bumping your head on a door.
But if you're one of those real frightening anal sticklers for Marvel continuity? And you get genuinely angry about people playing fast and loose with Marvel comics canon? Please don't pick it up. You'll have a heart attack, and I don't need that on my conscience, despite the wonders it'd do for my reputation.
If you don't like me, then don't look at me
There must be somebody else
If you hate this show and absolutely loathe these begging segments where I ask people to support us, and you're still watching this right now... you need serious help. There are medical professionals who are trained specifically to help people like you. They will get you off that computer, they will get you a life, they will get you some hobbies, maybe even some friends and self-esteem. There's simply no reason you need to continue this miserable, awful existence.
If you don't like me... fine! Watch anime.
—Tornado Shanks, Sea Lab 2021
"Well if you don't like the remake of The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, then don't buy it. If you think Skyward Sword is going to suck, then don't play it."
"Like for instance, if you're watching a TV show and you decide to take your values from that, you're an idiot. Maybe you should take responsibility for what values your kids are getting. Maybe you shouldn't be letting your kids watch certain shows in the first place if you have such a big problem with them, instead of blaming the shows themselves. (stares at the audience) Yeah.
—Peter Griffin, Family Guy, "Boys Do Cry"
"People who respond to reviews of their stories with any variation of 'if you don't like it, don't read it' aren't actually looking for reviews. What they're wanting is their belly rubbed. They're wanting a scritch behind the ears and to be told that they're a good doggie. They don't want criticism. They want blowjobs."
— Fan Fiction Writer "Worldmaker", on FanFiction.Net
"I don't get into the position of defending my books. If they've heard things, if they've reead passages out of context and they're concerned, then I'd urge them to read the books themselves. Then if they decide that they absolutely don't want their children to read the books..."