Quotes / Delivery Stork

Random Girl: ...And mommy kissed daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and left a diamond under a leaf, in the cabbage patch, and then the diamond turned into a baby!
Pugsly: Our parents are having a baby too.
Wednesday: They had sex.

Todd: Daddy, was Mommy a monkey? I can't remember.
Ned: No one was ever a monkey! Everything is what it was and always will be! God put us here and that's that!
Todd: But you said a stork brought me.
Ned: Um...that was God disguised as a stork.
Rod: Who brings baby storks?
Ned: There's no such thing as storks! It's all God!
Todd: (praying to a stuffed stork) Please bless Daddy...
The Simpsons, "The Monkey Suit"

A stork was a large European bird, about half the size of a Bermuda Ern. Children who wanted to know where babies came from were sometimes told that they were brought by storks. People who told their children such a thing felt that their children were too young to think intelligently about wide-open beavers and all that.

For as long as can be remembered, storks delivered babies. From their perch on Stork Mountain, it was an honor and a privilege to serve. It was our duty, our core belief, the driving force behind our very life blood. It wasn't always easy. This was our challenge. This was our sacred duty. No matter how tough or impossible or brutal or harsh or inhumane or savage, we would triumph over adversity.

Thank goodness we don't do that anymore.