Quotes: Content Warnings

  • The Offspring:
    Ladies and gentlemen
    Welcome to the disclaimer
    That's right, the disclaimer

    This American apple pie institution
    Known as parental discretion
    Will cleanse any sense of innuendo or sarcasm
    from the lyrics that might actually make you think,
    and will also insult your intelligence at the same time

    So, protect your family!
    This album contains explicit depictions
    of things which are real.
    These real things are commonly known as life.
    So if it sounds sarcastic, don't take it seriously.
    If it sounds dangerous
    Do Not Try This at Home or at all.
    And if it offends you Just. Don't. Listen to it.

The BBC would like to announce that the next scene is not considered suitable for family viewing. It contains scenes of violence, involving people's heads and arms getting chopped off, their ears nailed to trees, and their toenails pulled out in slow motion. There are also scenes of naked women with floppy breasts, and also at one point you can see a pair of buttocks and there's another bit where I'll swear you can see everything, but my friend says it's just the way he's holding the spear. Because of the unsuitability of the scene, the BBC will be replacing it with a scene from a repeat of Gardening Club for 1958.

"Well, we warned you."
Edward Van Sloan, Frankenstein (1931) (1931)

"Warning: It's I Spit On Your Grave!"