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Quotes: Blasphemous Boast
"DO I LOOK LIKE SOMEONE WHO CARES WHAT GOD THINKS!?"

"I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God; I will also sit on the mount of the congregation on the farthest sides of the north; I will ascend above the heights of the clouds, I will be like the Most High."
Satan, Isiah, 14:13-14

"Everything in creation is flawed. Humans don't need to be mentioned. Air, intent, and even time. My eyes can see the death of things. They're special, like yours. So I can kill anything that lives. Even if that thing is God."
Ryougi Shiki, Kara no Kyoukai

"Why, I bet this is a better three-bean salad than God could make!"
Lore Sjöberg, The Book Of Ratings

"Still worshipping God? Last time I heard, he started worshipping me!"
Lord Flashheart, Blackadder

"I am a monstrous clever fellow, and can walk widdershins 'round all the gods and godlets."
Jurgen, Jurgen, a Comedy of Justice, James Branch Cabell, 1919

Hacker: What has Sir Arnold to fear, anyway? He's got all the honours he could want, surely.
Bernard: Well, naturally he has his 'G'.
Hacker: 'G'?
Bernard: Yes, you get your 'G' after your 'K'.
Hacker: You speak in riddles, Bernard.
Bernard: Well, take the Foreign Office. First, you get the CMG, then the KCMG, then the GCMG. The Commander of the Order of St. Michael and St. George, Knight Commander of St. Michael and St. George, Knight Grand Cross of St. Michael and St. George. Of course, in the service, CMG stands for "Call Me God." And KCMG for "Kindly Call Me God."
Hacker: What does GCMG stand for?
Bernard: "God Calls Me God."
Yes, Minister, "Doing The Honours"

Minion: "You may have killed our men, but he won't let you get away with this!"
Piccolo: "Oh? And who's 'he'?"
Cooler: "That's He with a capital H, by the way." [summarily Death-Beams Piccolo]
— "Revenge of Cooler", Dragon Ball Z Abridged

"You see, Firestar? I am even more powerful than StarClan, for I have changed the Clans in the forest from four to two. TigerClan and BloodClan will rule together."
Tigerstar to Firestar, Warrior Cats

"I am the only man that has ever been able to keep a whole church together since the days of Adam. A large majority of the whole have stood by me. Neither Paul, John, Peter, nor Jesus ever did it. I boast that no man ever did such a work as I. The followers of Jesus ran away from Him; but the Latter-day Saints never ran away from me yet"

Aeron "Damphair": We shall have no king but from the kingsmoot. No godless man—
Euron: -may sit the Seastone Chair, aye. As it happens as I have oft sat upon the Seastone Chair of late. It raises no objections. Who knows more of gods than I? Horse gods and fire gods, gods made of gold with gemstone eyes, gods carved of cedar wood, gods chiseled into mountains, gods of empty air... I know them all. I have seen their peoples garland them with flowers, and shed the blood of goats and bulls and children in their names. And I have heard the prayers, in half a hundred tongues. Cure my withered leg, make the maiden love me, grant me a healthy son. Save me, succor me, make me wealthy... protect me! Protect me from mine enemies, protect me from the darkness, protect me from the crabs inside my belly, from the horselords, from the slavers, from the sellswords at my door. Protect me from the Silence. Godless? Why, Aeron, I am the godliest man ever to raise sail! You serve one god, Damphair, but I have served ten thousand. From Ib to Asshai, when men see my sails, they pray.
Aeron: They pray to trees and golden idols and goat-headed abominations. False gods...
Euron: Just so and for that sin I kill them all. I spill their blood upon the sea and sow their screaming women with my seed. Their little gods cannot stop me, so plainly they are false gods. I am more devout than even you, Aeron. Perhaps it should be you who kneels to me for blessing.

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