Quotes / Bland-Name Product

Quagmire: Wow, Joe, how'd you pull that off?
Joe: I put in a call from the McDaniel's payphone while you guys were getting that 9-piece Chicken McFingers and those Diet Conks and those fresh fries.
Quagmire: Oh, come o—! T-They don't own french fries!
Family Guy, (a little later in) "Cool Hand Peter"

Bart: Which of these board lames shall we play? Taffy Land?
Milhouse: Drops and Risers?
Bart: Consternation.
Milhouse: Ravenous Ravenous Rhinos.
Bart: Mouse Catch.
Milhouse: Battle Boat.
Bart: Funopoly.
Milhouse: Crate of Apes.
Bart: Yahtzu.
Milhouse: Tiddlywonks.
(Bart then discovers "Devil's Path", a likely parody of "Jumanji")
The Simpsons, "Treehouse of Horror XXI"

And by the way, I'm not sure if you're familiar with the brand Harmin'? But, uh, the manufacturers of this particular toilet paper? No free rides.

This is a comic strip about an elderly woman getting so turned on by reading low-grade bondage smut that she has to go stand outside in the snow in order to keep from "overheating." That is literally what is going on here, and believe it or not, it's not that Lillian and her septuagenarian book club are apparently getting off on whips and chains, because, y'know, if that's what they're into, more power to 'em...On the bright side, 50 Shades of Purple implies that the dude in the Funkyverse version of that book is named "Christian Purple," which is delightful.
Chris Sims, "Fuckywatch — January's Most Depressing Funky Winkerbean and Crankshat'' Strips"

Simon: I was hungry! I needed my Joffo Cakes! See what I did there? Joffo cakes?
Lewis: It's not trademark-breaking if you don't spell it correctly.
Yogscast, Yogventures trailer.

By the way, what bar just advertises "Beer"? That's pretty generic isn't it? Oh, yeah! I’ve always been a fan of “Beer” beer! It’s almost as good as “Burger” burgers!

Dan Halen: Attention primitives: thy wait is over. I give you your very own Ballmart.
Granny: No no, the store is called Wal-
Dan Halen: Ballmart I said, Baaallmart!
Granny: Yeah, but you mean-
Dan Halen: Ballmart!
Maybe I'll make an actual Outrun art project, involving, shit, I don't know. Hotline Miami recreated entirely in web languages. But then I'll get striked by the copyright vultures, so I'll call it "Bob Lime Boob Slamming" or what have you.