Quotes: Bigger Is Better in Bed
(reading off a card): What do women want in a modern gentleman? Jimeoin
(walking onto the dot): Big cocks.
A large penis is always welcome.
— Atia of the Julii
"His attraction for her is understandable. Her attraction for him? Not all that clear, really. Unless size really does matter? For me, no. Size can be uncomfortable. For her, clearly a selling feature. Because she’s been going around telling her friends about it. And her nickname for him, which she hasn’t been shy about sharing, is 'Monster Cock'. Which is flattering, I guess, if you’re in college or Vegas."
That long monologue he gives her about the “cobra grande“ – He’s definitely talking about his dick there, right?
Josh: A snake with ONE EYE, just like Basil St. John!
If you stare into his dick you become enchanted, that is what he says to her.
: Lionel and Lex yell at each other about being dicks, and then Lionel tries to use a magical Kryptonian Water Stone of Power that he stole from Link’s inventory screen in The Legend of Zelda: The Violin of Vathlo
to switch with Lex except Clark is all NAWW
and tries to stop him because he thinks it’s a gun and then, in classic Smallville Ineffectual Clark style
, he trades bodies
with his archenemy...After that, there’s an entire television cast of attractive women for that thirsty Luthor blood
to awkwardly attack as he tries to take advantage of being a 27 17 year-old
high school football quarterback hero. First up on his list: Martha Kent
, right after admiring his new penis. No, SERIOUSLY
: I’m starting to think that think Tom Welling smirking obliviously while looking down at his own junk is a metaphor for this entire series.
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri, on Smallville