"Sometimes when I'm eating a blueberry muffin, it's so tasty and delightful, that I think, 'Wow, this is better than sex!' And sometimes when I'm having sex I think, 'Wow, this is very expensive. I should have just gotten a muffin.'"
"Few people in the world get to hit their bosses but those who do will tell you it is better than sex."
"It beats any meat injection. That beats any fucking cock in the world!"
"There's nothing better than good sex. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is better than bad sex."
"Nothing is better than sex, and anyone who says no has never had a good woman."
"Have you ever flown a flying saucer? Afterwards, sex seems trite."
Candidate: For me, making money is better than sex.
You're not doing it right.
"Glorious! A rush, an incredible rush. A heroin addict's rush of drugs into his blood, a drunk's first drink burning down a raw, ready throat. Oh, oh, I wanted to, to scream, to flail out of control. It was mind, it was body, it was sex and money and power and revenge and triumph all rolled into one."
"Magic! So this was what it felt like! No wonder wizards didn't have much truck with sex!"
"Nothing, nothing, nothing is better than sex; it is what God created us to do."
There are cakes out there that claim to be better than sex, and we feel a great surge of pity for the makers of said cakes. This cake has infinitely more realistic goals, and therefore accomplishes them. It's a good way to tell your sweetheart that you're not fit to touch the hem of his or her garment.