->''"[[PublicServiceAnnouncement Don't feed the Yao Guai. That is all.]]"''
-->-- '''Three Dog''', ''VideoGame/{{Fallout 3}}''

->''"I do fear bears. They're giant, marauding, godless killing machines."''
-->-- '''Creator/StephenColbert''', ''Series/TheColbertReport''

->''"A bear doesn't love! They don't think! They don't feel! They're thieves!"''
-->-- '''Kenai''', ''Disney/BrotherBear''

->''"And, ladies and gentlemen, the number one threat to America... BEARS!"''
-->-- '''Creator/StephenColbert''', ''Series/TheColbertReport''

->'''Nick:''' That's a scary-ass bear!
->'''Brad:''' That's, like, a ''Film/{{Jaws}}''-sized bear!
->'''Nick:''' That's not even a bear. That's like a monster bear. What the fuck...
-->--''Podcast/FourPlayerPodcast'', [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ixvh-8W1OS8 "Holy Crap That's a Bear!"]] upon seeing The Bear from ''VideoGame/Condemned2Bloodshot'' for the first time.

->''"Don't try to outrun one of Dominaria's Grizzlies; it'll catch you, knock you down, and eat you. Of course, you could run up a tree. In that case you'll get a nice view before it knocks down the tree and eats you."''
-->-- FlavorText for the ''TabletopGame/MagicTheGathering'' card [[http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=83115 Grizzly Bears]]; and they're pretty mediocre, as bears go

->'''Spike''': A bear! You made a bear!\\
'''Buffy''': I didn't mean to!\\
'''Spike''': Undo it! Undo it!
-->-- ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''

->''"'The thing about a bear', his father had always said, 'is that it can move as silently as breath. It could be watching you from ten paces away and you'd never know. Against a bear you have no defenses. You can't run faster. You can't climb higher. You can't fight it on your own. All you can do is learn its ways, and try to persuade it that you're neither threat nor prey.'"''
-->--''[[TheChroniclesOfAncientDarkness Wolf Brother]]''

->''"You hear that, Ed? Bears. Now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy."''
-->-- ''*Brian Fantana''', ''Film/AnchormanTheLegendOfRonBurgundy''

->[[color:green:>Walk into Gamestop.]]\\
[[color:green:>Purchase game.]]\\
[[color:green:>Walk back to car.]]\\
[[color:green:>Open case.]]\\
[[color:green:>Disc is a bear.]]\\
[[color:green:>Attack it with my claws.]]\\
[[color:green:>I am also a bear.]]\\
-->-- [[ImageBoards /v/]]'s most common variation of the FUCKING GAMESTOP [[MemeticMutation meme]].

->''"No Andalite accustomed to our more pacific animal life could possibly understand what a grizzly bear charge means. Even most humans would fail to imagine it. Grizzly bears are not lithe and graceful like the big cats. They are more like dogs. They move with a rolling, lopsided gait that at first seems almost tentative, as if they might stop at any moment.\\
"But then you begin to realize how large they are. And you begin to realize that, awkward or not, they are [[LightningBruiser very fast]]. And you begin to realize that you are puny, pathetic, weak and insignificant. [[OhCrap You begin to realize]] that this bear, [[TheJuggernaut this rolling, shaggy, unstoppable monster, can kill you from the mere impact of his shoulder hitting you.]]"''
-->-- '''Ax''' on '''Rachel's''' favourite combat morph, ''Literature/{{Animorphs}}'', 'The Experiment'

->''"Bears, [[TrademarkFavoriteFood beets]]. . . Series/{{Battlestar Galactica|2003}}."''
-->-- '''Jim Halpert'''[='s=] imitation of Dwight, ''Series/{{The Office|US}}''

->''"Being a gigantic bear is nature's way of saying, 'Fuck off!'"''
-->-- ''Website/{{Cracked}}'', "[[http://www.cracked.com/article_18837_7-superpowered-animal-senses-you-wont-believe-are-possible.html 7 Superpowered Animal Senses You Won't Believe Are Possible]]"

->'''Kathleen:''' I just have this completely rational fear of bears.Ē\\
'''Gramm:''' Explain.\\
'''Kathleen:''' Well, letís see. Why donít I list off everything that makes me afraid of bears, and weíll take off anything that seems unreasonable. Bears are very large, they have giant teeth and claws, they have been known to maul humans, they can crush a human skull in their jaws, and if they can be taught to dance, Iím pretty sure they can be taught to do kung-fu, and that would fuck you up.
-->-- ''LoadingReadyRun'', from the episode [[http://loadingreadyrun.com/videos/view/29/OMG-Bears/QT OMG! Bears!]]

-> ''"Battle ''bears''? B E A R S?"''
-->-- '''Creator/GeorgeTakei''', ''VideoGame/CommandAndConquerRedAlert3'' outtakes, has the idea of the War Bear explained to him.

->''"Bears are crazy, Willie. They'll bite your head if you're wearing steak on it."''
-->-- '''Space Ghost''', ''WesternAnimation/SpaceGhostCoastToCoast''

->''"Bear? Is the bear back? [[WhatMeasureIsAMook We've already lost one intern!]]"''
-->-- '''Bridgette''', ''[[WesternAnimation/TotalDramaIsland Total Drama World Tour]]'', "Aftermath Aftermayhem"

->'''Hobo:''' Well Abby, can I tell you something about bears?\\
'''Abby:''' Sure.\\
'''Hobo:''' The bear is a solitary animal. They like their space. They live in a magic circle. They don't mind if you're like a mile away, but if you get inside their circle, they will maul you. If a bear's claw would ever strike your face, it would take your whole face right off your skull... your eyes, your nose, your lips, everything.\\
'''Abby:''' Wow. Didn't know bears could be so vicious.
-->-- ''Film/HoboWithAShotgun''

->''"H-he's like a bear! He's like a big shaved bear that hates people!"''
-->-- '''The Scout''' from ''VideoGame/TeamFortress2'', describing the Heavy

->''"Acid was always [[TheStoner my]] [[MushroomSamba favorite drug.]] When we would do acid, we'd go out into the woods, because there was less chance of running into an authority figure--but we ran into a bear, and that was an even ''bigger'' buzzkill..."''

-->-- [[MemeticMutation The most famous piece of]] [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative stage direction ever]], from ''Theatre/TheWintersTale''

->''"Number one, it's a bear. Number two, it's a bear. Number three, and probably most important... HOLY SHIT, YOU FUCKING IDIOT! IT'S A GODDAMNED BEAR!"''
-->-- '''Nash''', ''WebVideo/WhatTheFuckIsWrongWithYou'', pointing out the flaws in a man's crazed attempt to murder his ex-girlfriend.

->''"Kid can't hunt a grizzly, thing'll eat him alive."''
-->--'''John Marston''', ''VideoGame/RedDeadRedemption''

->''"This is bad news."''
-->--'''Toriko''', the ''Manga/OnePiece X {{Toriko}}'' crossover, meeting '''[[{{Unicorn}} one-horned]] [[MixAndMatchCritters bears]]'''.

->''"Honestly, if a stranger were to fuck with a bear, that'd probably be the last time you heard from that stranger anyway."''
-->--'''BradJones''', ''DVDRHell's [[WinnieThePooh "Too Smart for Strangers"]]''

->''"I believe all God's creatures have a soul... except bears--bears are godless killing machines!"''
-->-- '''Creator/StephenColbert''', ''Series/TheColbertReport''

->''"Iím pretty sure the survival strategy for a polar bear encounter is "donít encounter a polar bear"."''
-->-- '''Dan Shive''', ''Webcomic/ElGoonishShive''

->''"Watch out for bears...To them, you are spaghetti dinner."''
-->-- The main theme to ''WesternAnimation/PerfectHairForever''

->''"We just got the test results back from Japanese Bear Dad. It's a disaster! Bears are scary! No child wants to be raised by bears!"''
-->-- The network executive from the ''WesternAnimation/PerfectHairForever'' episode "Woke Up Drunk"

->''"Never trust a... '''BEAR!!'''"''
-->-- '''Tresdin the Legion Commander''', ''VideoGame/{{Dota 2}}'', on defeating bear-like heroes.