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Quotes: Aquaman
Jeff: Well, I like Aquaman; he can breathe underwater and talk to fish!
Melvin: Yeah, cool! He has all the same powers as SpongeBob.
Jeff Dunham, Spark of Insanity

"I'm saddened your Sea-King isn't here."
"You're lucky our Sea-King isn't here!"
Justice League of America, "Welcome to the Working Week"

"As new as I am to learning about superheroes, everything that is well known to everyone else — like the fact that Aquaman is regarded as kind of lame — is new and hilarious. I read a bit about Aquaman growing a beard and having a harpoon hand and living in a cave and talking to spirits or something, and thought, how can anyone not like this guy? This crazy dude living under the water. Anyway that is the only version of Aquaman that I am really into."

Batman's got an attitude, everybody takes him seriously
And Superman never made any money, well try to tell that to DC
All the other members of the Justice League
Say I have useless super powers and make fun of me
But I know there will come a day
When they're gonna stare in slack-jawed wonder as they hear me say

CHORUS:
I am Aquaman and nobody better mess with me
I may be nothing to you but I am a king beneath the sea
Let's see you get by underwater as well as I do on the ground
I am Aquaman and you better not mess around

There are days I swear I would rather have
The proportionate strength of a praying mantis
Than be the last lost noble prince
Of the undersea kingdom of Atlantis

Batman's got the Batmobile, Diana's got her invisible jet
It seems like everybody else can fly, even Samurai
but a stupid seahorse is all I get
Green Arrow's sharp but I couldn't be any duller
My orange costume's uglier than any other color
I'm not as tough as Batman or as cute as Gleek
I'm a little taller than The Atom but smaller than Apache Chief

CHORUS

Clark Kent wouldn't be the same if he didn't have his Lois Lane
Green Arrow's got his Black Canary
Even millionaire Bruce Wayne has that thing on the side
with his ward Dick Grayson

But there's just one girl that I would marry

Wonder Woman!
All the world is waiting for you
And the magic that you do
In your satin tights
Fighting for our rights
And the old red, white and blue!


Batman signed a movie deal though you know he doesn't need the cash
And all the second-rate superheroes get TV shows
even the pre-Crisis Flash
But not me, I guess that I don't rate
My comic book's been cancelled more than Doctor Fate
I know that I'm no Brainiac but I'm no fool
I know not even Peter David can make me cool

CHORUS
—>— Ookla The Mok, "Arthur Curry"

Superman can fly and can stop a speeding bullet, Batman has gadgets and crime fighting machines, The Flash runs so fast he can catch a falling baby: I can talk to some fish. Yeah, I'll go have a chat with some fish.

Spiderman spins webs and he always senses danger, The Hulk can break through 100-ton steal beams, Iron Man's suit can defeat a whole army: I can talk to some fish. Yeah, I'll go have a chat with some fish.

CHORUS: Fish, fish, fish! Fish are really boring! Complain about the weather and they never fall asleep. Fish, fish, fish! Donít have any feelings. They can't turn their heads, won't make eye contact with me, with me.

Captain America is a super soldier, Thor is a magic Norse god, Wolverine heals faster than he's injured. I can talk to some fish. Yeah, I'll go have a chat with some fish.

CHORUS 2X
The Motion Sick: Aquaman's Lament

"What's that? You want me to start making jokes about how useless Aquaman is? Hahahahaha... Aquaman is the king of Atlantis, whose domain pretty much encompasses the entirety of the ocean. He owns 70% of the planet! He is super strong, super fast, and he can summon Cthulhu to eat your soul if he felt like it. The perception of Aquaman as 'useless' is based on the Super Friends cartoon series, where Aquaman's superpower is that he owns a jet ski. ...I don't make fun of Aquaman."

Linkara, in his review of Brave and the Bold #54


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