The closing line to any fight or disagreement between a teenager and either his father/mother or (more commonly) his important replacement parental figure (in the right genre, between the hero and his mentor). This is either a loophole for someone who really is in the wrong and wants a reason to end the argument without defending himself, or a way for a Good-aligned (or standards-bearing) offspring to inform his Evil-aligned father [figure] that he has crossedtheline and is no longer worthy of respect, admiration, or obedience.
A stipulation is that the mentor has been more of a parent than the referenced father ever was. Or maybe an older brother with a Promotion to Parent.
A twist that turns up the tension is "You're not his father."
Compare/contrast with I Have No Son.
In an unusual variation, Vivio meant this literally. She'd been mind-screwed so thoroughly by Quattro that the poor girl genuinely believed that the person she was facing was someone disguised as her Mama in an attempt to deceive her.
Ace uses this phrase on Garp in a flashback in One Piece, in response to him opposing his plan to become a pirate. Unlike some who invoke it on a non-biological father figure, he doesn't think much of his biological father.
In the Dressrosa arc, a minor flashback (a few days ago, rather than the usual year gap) showed a heated argument between sixteen-year old Rebecca and her parental figure, the Living Toy Thunder Soldier. The former wanted to participate in a tournament so she could win the Flame Flame Fruit and kill Doflamingo, the latter heavily protested against it, not wanting the young girl to die. His refusal, combined with her anger following Doflamingo's fake resignation from the Shichibukai, led to her saying that not only is he not her father, but he's also just a one-legged toy soldier. Hurt and unwilling to argue any longer, the Soldier just prayed she doesn't enter and left, as Rebecca, feeling extremely guilty and ashamed for what she said, tried in vain to get him to stay. Fortunately, they patched things up afterwards, though offscreen. It's even more hurtful for the Thunder Soldier because he is Rebecca's father. He is in fact the legendary warrior Kyros who was transformed into a toy. Nobody else, not even Rebecca, remembers him because people who are transformed into toys become unpersoned.
In Persona 4: The Animation, after Nanako finally has enough of her father putting his work before her, she subjects him to a tear-filled rant before finishing with this line and sprinting off upstairs. Earlier in the episode, she builds up to this by telling Yu that she doubts her father is actually her father because he seems to care about his work more than her.
Kyo from Fruits Basket shouted this (in a flashback) about his adoptive father, who became distant after overhearing it. It turns out it was because Kyo (who has self-esteem issues) didn't want people to reflect poorly on his adoptive father by thinking they were related, as he's not worthy of having such a good parent.
This is put to very emotionally moving use in Princess Tutu, when Rue finally defies the Raven.
Space Pirate Mito is devastated when Aoi ends a fight by shouting "You're not my mom, you're just an alien in a suit that looks like my mom!" because she actually is his mother even if she is an alien in a suit. They reconcile when she tells him the story of how she met his father.
Spider Jerusalem from Transmetropolitan was once told this by a person he was trying to interview.
Liesl: How is that any of your business? You're not my dad. I do what I have to do. I was told to hide, I hid. I get scared, I deal with getting scared my own fucking way. Clear? [Beat Panel] Liesl: You're not my dad, right? Spider: No. Liesl: Good. [Beat Panel]
In White Devil of the Moon, Nanoha, in this story the reincarnation of Princess Serenity, was far from impressed in her past self's actions, and blamed Queen Serenity for her lax attention to Serenity, as both a mother and a queen, and declared that her mother was Momoko Takamachi, not Queen Serenity. Later, when Alicia tries to protect Fate from Precia, Precia attacks Alicia for defying her, causing Fate to declare she was no mother of hers and attack with extreme prejudice.
In Naruto:Asunder, Naruto directs this at both parents when they try (and fail) to explain sealing the Kyuubi in him and wanting to be a family again (unlike in canon, they're still alive). By the end of the story, however, not only did Naruto manage to make up with Minato and Kushina, but he also called them "mom" and "dad" just before the final battle against Madara.
"You BOTH aren't my parents. You don't deserve to be. I made it fine without you all these years and I'll keep making it WITHOUT YOU. Don't bother me ever again."
Jen Potter/Black in Black Princess Ascendant does this via magical adoption (which replaces a single parent) to Lily. Narcissa and Andromeda explain that while she might prefer to do it to James, that would mean Lily was pregnant by two men at the same time and even magic insists they use something possible. As a result, as far as both magic and the law are concerned, Bellatrix Lestrange raped and obliviated James Potter during the previous war. Given that the Potters never filed any paperwork saying Jen existed, they can't prove otherwise.
In The Prayer Warriors, Percy Jackson declares that Zeus is not his father (canonically, Poseidon is, but Zeus is in this fic) on two occasions- once when converting to Christianity and joining the Prayer Warriors, and again before killing Zeus, saying that so he can avoid committing the sin of patricide.
Said by Kristy in the Baby Sitters Club movie, when her stepfather berates her for coming home late — from a secret visit with her biological Disappeared Dad, but he didn't know that. Made all the more heart-breaking by the fact that there are several points in the books where Watson plainly calls Kristy his daughter, even giving her an antique family heirloom in the Little SisterSpinoff, and her biological dad stood her up in the end, anyway.
A little jarring though; this is never resolved in the movie (with Kristy apologizing to Watson for what she said), outside of her narration explaining to the audience she felt bad.
A variation occurs in Terminator 2 with John Connor.
Said by Jerri in the Strangers with Candy movie to Stew the meat-man, who promptly responds, "You're not my daughter!"
Inverted in Star Trek where Spock meets future Spock, who says "I'm not our father."
At the end of Ninja Assassin, Raizo confronts his old mentor Lord Ozunu, who wants Raizo to "beg [his] father for forgiveness". Raizo shoots back "you are not my father", prompting a shadow-blending ass-kicking from Ozunu.
For reference, Ozunu had Raizo and dozens of others kidnapped as children and put through Training from Hell to become ninjas. As far as Ozunu was concerned, they were all his children.
Joe: You know what my kids would say... Tom Servo: "You're not my real father!"
In the second live-action film of George of the Jungle, Junior says this to Lyle Van De Groot after his mother was hypnotized to thinking he was her husband. Twice. And kicking him in the shins both times. Well, in the second time, Lyle had shin guards, in which Junior then proceeded to stomp on Lyle's foot.
Uncle Albert: But I love you like your father did. I looked after you like your father did. I even had sex with your mother like your father did!
Anna uses this on Isabel in Stepmom, and Isabel's response is "THANK GOD FOR THAT!"
In Thor, an indirect version—since only one of the characters is aware of the relation—takes place when Loki shoots Laufey with Gungnir while making it clear who he considers to be his true parent:
Loki: And your death came by the son of Odin.
When Thor tries to talk down Loki in the final confrontation and calls him "brother", Loki angrily responds this way.
Loki: I'm not your brother! I never was.
In Thor: The Dark World, Loki furiously yells a variation of this when he and Frigga discuss Odin. Somewhat justified, as Loki had been disowned and would've been executed if it weren't for his mother's influence.
Frigga: Your father— Loki: HE'S NOT MY FATHER! Frigga: And am I not your mother? Loki:...No. You are not.
Elaine Isaak's Eunuch's Heir — used by Wolfram, the title character, against his (unbeknownst to him) actual, biological father.
To make this variant more interesting, Harry feels touched by this... but then goes against Mrs. Weasley's wishes anyway.
In the Maeve Binchy novel Evening Class, a character has just learned that her oldest sister is in fact her mother. Several days later, her "father" (actually grandfather) asks her to run an errand for him. When she refuses, still upset at the revelation and deception, he sternly tells her "no child of mine is going to speak to me like that". She responds by coldly declaring, "I'm NOT a child of yours.", thus revealing that she knows the secret. After a Beat in which this sinks in, he tells her essentially HAS been a father to her these past 16 years and even if not, he's still her grandfather and deserving of respect.
In the Sweet Valley Saga book The Wakefields Of Sweet Valley, Ted Wakefield gets fed up with his Aunt Sarah's suggestions on what to do with his life (college, etc) and finally snaps at her "You're not my mother!". He later apologizes, seeing as how she HAS been a mother to him all his life, as his parents (her brother and sister-in-law) were killed in a train crash when he was a baby. However, as the reader knows, Sarah IS his mother—the entire story was a fabrication to prevent him or anyone else knowing that he was illegitimate.
Inverted in The Thorn Birds, as Paddy and Frank argue, Paddy tells Frank, "You're no better than the bastard who fathered you!", thus revealing what Frank has always suspected, that Paddy is not his father.
In To Sir With Love, Braithwaite's students try to annoy him by constantly using obscenities when they speak. After one girl complains, "I can't do this sum, sir, it's too bleeding hard", he angrily asks her if she uses such words when speaking to her father. Her response? "You're not my bleeding father."
In Amber Brown is On the Move, the title character shouts this after her new stepfather, Max, gets on her case about not packing the stuff in her room for their upcoming move to their new house. She's upset at herself, as she normally likes Max reasonably well, and it causes her to realize that she needs some help from her friends
After Bear and Lena elope in the Collegium Chronicles, Bear's father Healer Tyrall tries to kidnap Bear to force an end to the marriage. After he gets arrested for charging up to the Royal Palace (and home of the Healer's Collegium) with armed mercenaries, Bear publicly declares that he is no relation to Healer Tyrall. It's implied that this will have actual legal force.
In Jane Eyre, after Jane's aunt unfairly punished Jane and locked her in a room that Jane was terrified of, the 10-year-old Jane vowed to never call her "Aunt" again. Since the aunt was Jane's legal guardian, this counts.
In The Sandman and the War of Dreams, Book 4 of The Guardians of Childhood , Emily Jane shouts this to Typhan when he tells her "Daughter! Stop!" after she starts using her powers for harm. Pitch, the Big Bad of the series, is actually her father, but he's become like a surrogate father to her, so it stings badly.
A variation occurs in the Septimus Heap series. Jenna tells this to Milo Banda after he makes a disastrous attempt at bonding with her and some of her brothers, and she runs off in a huff. The variation is that Milo Banda is her father... her biological father, but he's not the one who raised her. She's making the point that, while Milo may have brought her into the world, Silas Heap is her real father.
Ana is The Glimpse after he rescues her from an Asylum.
Live Action TV
The lines are spoken word-for-word on Heroes on several occasions when Claire Bennett tries to assert her independence from Noah, aka HRG guy. Naturally, her not-dad, despite his communication shortcomings, is usually right.
To be fair, dealing with her real father and grandmother soon prompted her to declare "I have a family!" and jump out a tenth story window to escape from them.
It happened in a bigger way with Sylar. Angela went "Sylar, you're my son — oh no sorry false alarm." It was kind of pathetic.
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, in the landmark episode when Will's loser father shows up and invites his son to take a road trip. Will jumps at the opportunity, despite his uncle's warnings that his father can't be trusted.
Will: I've been waiting for this for a long time, my whole life, and nobody's gonna stop me now. Come tomorrow, I'm outta here. Uncle Phil: Oh, I don't think so. Will: Who cares what you think!? YOU ARE NOT MY FATHER!
A more subtle version occurs at the end of the episode when his father abandons him again.
Lou: "It was great seeing you son."
Will: "Yeah, you too, Lou."
Sister Sister: When Ray tells Tia that her new boyfriend just got out of prison and the bottom line is that she can't go out with him, she responds, "Well, bottom line, you're not my father!"
Tamera says the reverse near the end of the series when Tia and Tamera meet someone who could very well be their biological father. Tamera gets pissed when he asks them to take a DNA test to confirm that he is their real father:
Tamera: I don't need a DNA test to know who my real father is. He's the man who's been there for me my entire life. And a good part of yours too Tia. His name is Ray Campbell. And as far as I'm concerned, he is all the father I will ever need.
7th Heaven, in the episode when Eric is trying to protect Robbie from his recently resurfaced deadbeat father, Ed:
Perhaps not quite average for the trope since the boy in question is a baby, not a teenager... But the line came up, unavoidably, in a very tense scene in the LOST episode "Fire & Water". Charlie, insistent on baptizing Claire's baby son regardless of Claire's wishes, runs afoul of Locke:
Charlie: Who the hell are you, John? Aaron's not your responsibility. ...You're not his father. You're not his family. Locke: Neither are you, Charlie.
A really bizarre example occurs in the UK science fiction comedy Hyperdrive. Technical Officer Jeffers is reminiscing about being raised by a computer simulation of his father, created when his father knew he was dying. Then, when Jeffers was fifteen, they got into an argument, and Jeffers said "You're not my real dad! You're just a piece of code!" and deleted the program. He tried to restore it the next day, but couldn't.
The British Soap EastEnders had this sort of conversation, subverted because:
Zoe Slater: You can't tell me what to do, you ain't my mother! Kat Slater:(Zoe's "sister") Yes I am!
In Nip/Tuck, Matt says this to Christian right after the latter bails him out of jail. the twist is that Christian really is Matt's father and had only found this out in the same episode. Unusually for this trope, Matt's pronouncement is actually quite accurate- Christian isn't much of a father figure to him at all.
A slightly depressing example occurs in the last episode of Supernatural, Season One. Sam and Dean have managed to rescue their father and Dean is worrying about having wasted a bullet (it only has a few left and they need all the bullets they can get). Unknown to them, John has been possessed by the Big Bad ever since they found him. But when John comes out and tells Dean how proud of him he is, Dean realizes the truth and says exactly this.
Played straight in a Season Five episode; a depressed Dean tells this to Bobby, who is trying to keep him from letting Michael take over his body. The same episode had Adam say this about John, who is his birth father, but didn't raise him.
Season seven has a flashback of Bobby talking on the phone to John, who tells he is not Dean's father after Bobby decides to take him to the park instead of to practice shooting (Dean was just a kid at the time).
There's an episode of CSI: Miami in which Horatio meets a teenage boy. Horatio keeps calling him 'son', until the boy snaps back at him 'You're Not My Father'... little does he know that Horatio had earlier run a paternity test...
Angel: Angel's son Connor, raised by Angel's sworn enemy in a hell dimension, gets off at least one of these Eastwood style. He later identifies Angelus as his real father (who he wants to kill).
In a House episode, the titular character reveals that he figured out that his father (John House) was not really his biological father when he was twelve, and told this to him, causing John to not speak a single word to his son for two months.
Freddie on iCarly uses this when Lewbert, their building's doorman enters a relationship with Freddie's mother.
Used in Fringe after Peter finds out that Walter stole him as a child from the alternate universe.
Delivered in a stunningly awesome way from Clark to Lionel in Smallville, just before the former cuts ties with the latter completely.
Andrea in The Walking Dead, when arguing with surrogate father figure Dale: "I'm not your little girl, I'm not your wife, and I'm sure as hell not your problem."
Morgana does this indirectly on Merlin, telling someone that she comes in the name of Gorlois because Gorlois made her who she was, not her real father, Uther.
On Charmed, Paige delivered this line to her adopted parents during an argument on the day before they died, and spent years feeling guilty about it.
On Revenge: rebellious teenager Declan to his older brother Jack when Jack is trying to convince Declan he has a duty to attend their father's funeral:
Just because he's dead doesn't make you my father.
Subverted on Who's the Boss? when Angela and Samantha get into an argument and Angela orders Samantha to go to her room. Samantha immediately shoots back that Angela isn't her mother. Tony intervenes, pointing out that he's her father, and he orders her to listen to Angela.
Inverted in The Thorn Birds, as Paddy and Frank argue, Paddy tells Frank, "You're no better than the bastard who fathered you!", thus revealing what Frank has always suspected, that Paddy is not his father. Then in the midquel "The Missing Years", Meggie's Jerkass husband Luke returns to take custody of their son Dane. Meggie's mother Fee intervenes when Luke insists that he wants the chance to make up for being an absent and neglectful father, telling him "but you're not his father".
In Suddenly Susan, the titular character gets "You're not my mother" snapped at her by one of her boyfriend's kids as she tries to bond with them.
On an episode of Full House, D.J. says this to Joey when he won't let her go to a karate tournament.
In "Cardassians" on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, a Cardassian war orphan who was adopted by Bajorans and raised to hate Cardassians says this to his biological Cardassian father when speaking to him for the first time.
Used as a minor joke in a sketch for The Whitest Kids U Know, where a man really excited that it is Saturday tells a woman whose car he wants to shoot with a bow that she's not his mother. She responds that she's his wife.
A variation is used in the first season finale of Haven after it's revealed that Chief Wuornos is not Nathan's biological father.
Audrey: We need to find him, yes, but he is your father. Nathan: That's debatable.
In a routine done by Robin Williams, the Biblical Joseph, after hearing Mary is pregnant and he'd be "the stepfather of God's kid," fears he won't be able to discipline Jesus since he'd just scream, "You're not my real dad!"
In Super Paper Mario, when Luvbi finds out that she's really one of the Pure Hearts, she argues with Grambi. At one point, she says: "Wait... Why do I explain myself to thee?! Thou art not my real father!"
In The House of the Dead III, Daniel says this verbatim as he delivers a final shot to his dad, the Final Boss of the game. See the page quote for more details.
Late in Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, Jennifer chews out her foster father General Carter, who only adopted her to use her for his plans. In the anime, she actually says "you're no father to me!"
In Dragon Age II, most of the resentment Carver feels towards their elder sibling is because they were left as sole breadwinner and head of the household after their father's death, three years prior to the game. The Legacy DLC implies Carver found it extra hard to deal with, due to Hawke greatly taking after their father in personality.
In Professor Layton and the Azran Legacy this is said more gently by Layton himself, after learning that Bronev, the Big Bad is his father. Layton considers the parents who raised him, but mentions being open to connecting with Bronev as colleagues, and possibly friends.
Played very tragically in Umineko no Naku Koro ni, where Ange's refusal to consider Eva as a mother, added to the latter's sadness and lingering hatred towards Ange's parents, made their relationship go to hell during the 12 years after the Rokkenjima incident. It doesn't help that Eva refused to tell the truth and was widely considered the culprit by gossips and tabloids.
Gunnerkrigg Court. Renard tries to lecture Annie about stealing homework answers from her friend Kat. Annie tries to brush Renard off by pointing out that he's not her father. Renard replies that he would have been a better father than her real dad was, and things just go downhill from there.
In No Rest for the Wicked, November says this to the witch — who is seriously delusionally and believes her to be Gretel.
Said by Jeshua in Shortpacked!, to Galasso, the nutjob who brought him back to life to be an attention grabbing gimick for his toystore. Given who the real dad is, its significantly more of a threat than usual.
In Homestuck, trolls don't have parents, since they're formed from an "incestuous slurry", and raised by a guardian animal called a Lusus. However, the Sufferer of the Post-Scratch troll ancestors was raised by a female troll called the Dolorosa. During a conversation between their Pre-Scratch counterparts, Kankri and Porrim, Kankri, who knows about both his other self and Earth reproduction, snaps "You are not my 'human mother'", much to Porrim's confusion.
Ben 10: Ben tells Grandpa Max, "You're not my dad!" when Grandpa scolds him for using the Omnitrix to sneak somewhere and play a video game.
Similarly in The Legend of Korra, Asami finally recognizes that the father she knew and loved is now gone, as he drew a line in the sand.
Batman declares this once in the animated series. Being Batman (and, y'know, knowing that his parents died years ago), he's right. The hallucination of his father that's been haunting him ever since Scarecrow gassed him disappears and doesn't return.
In Drawn Together, Clara invokes this in an argument with her stepmother. Her stepmother then reminds her that her mother's dead, and after realizing that she went too far in bringing this up, the two reconcile and Clara's stepmother gives her advice on how to break her Octopussoir curse.
Robot Chicken has their skit "Jedi Master George W./Jedi In Chief" more or less parodies this trope during a parody of the I Am Your Father scene in Star Wars, with George Bush as Vader and his daugher Jenna replacing Luke:
Occasionally comes to a head in TaleSpin with the character Kit, a 12-year-old prodigy orphan the main character took under his wing after he'd been formerly apprenticed to one of the series' main villains. The laid-back Baloo and his somewhat professional-yet-motherly boss Rebecca often act as surrogate parents to Kit, who alternates between a child's need for adult guidance and his own fiercely independent streak, which usually works quite well unless Kit feels he is being disregarded because of his age. In the episode "Stormy Weather," the villain of the week quite ably leverages this insecurity against Baloo and Rebecca's protectiveness of Kit in order to convince the child the adults are "holding him back" from his true potential, leading Kit to eventually break things off with them on the grounds that "you can't tell me what to do! You're not my dad!"
The Season One closeout for Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated had Freddy learn that the man he'd called Dad for years was actually some guy who pretty much stole him from his real parents; he was NOT ecstatic.
It gets worse when he finds out his real father is no better.