One of the few existing pictures that show Davis without a cock in his mouth
The Cracked Conspiracy, the definition of the word esoteric, written by Shamus.P. Davis, or College Binary
began writing a story out of boredom and lack of any real writing one day, so he decided to make it a fan fic about some of the more prominent members on Cracked. It originally was supposed to be only a few updates long, but it gained immense popularity among all those who read it, and thus Binary kept writing it. This would account for the disjointed, plot-holed story in the beginning. If you've never been to the Cracked Forums, or the internet, first of all, how are you reading this? And secondly: you are fat and nobody likes you. Possibly homosexual.
This kickass web-novel provides examples of:
- All Girls Want Bad Boys: Inverted: Kathana, rather than going for Nate, the epitome of a badass Chaotic Neutral, goes for the doughy scientist.
- Antiquated Linguistics: Camerhil, because he is "Incomprehensibly, intolerably British".
- Black Comedy Rape: In a word? Spermus.
- The Blind Leading the Blind: Originally, Archangel seemed like an example of this, but it turns out he is the 11th best Hacker on the internet.
- British Stuffiness: Camerhil is an embodiment of this trope.
- Breaking the Fourth Wall: Fishboy.
- Cannot Tell a Joke: Archangel, mostly because of his retardedness.
- Church of Happyology: Subverted: The oppressive, totalitarian church that is willing to sue anyone that offends them, is openly referred to as Scientology.
- Double Entendre
- Epic Fail: How the 4Channers describe David Wong.
- Evil Lawyer Joke: The entire character of Evil Sloth.
- Funny Foreigner: Karlski and Camerhil.
- Give Geeks a Chance: Parodied with the character of Oball, a doughy, unpleasant scientist who manages to mock God at every turn.
- Hilarity Sues: What Sloth does to Navigator2001Plus and the rest of the mods.
- Hurricane of Puns: Kicsi Viz.
- Made of Explodium
- Mix-and-Match Critters: Nedroid's theme park.
- My Friends... and Zoidberg: "Our seven heroes and Archangel watched in awe."
- Perfectly Cromulent Word: "Shitjockey", "inetnert", "popesplosion" and "rape'n'roll".
- Self-Deprecation: Fishboy's description of Shamus, and the little Hate By Numbers scene.
- Stealth Pun: "Well, this was a pointless waste of time."
- Ugly Guy, Hot Wife: Kathana and Oball.