You, uh, might want to listen to her.
"We're not perverts. We're superheroes."
"There's a difference?"
— Dee and Eurydice
Inspired by the Internetís alternative fiction communities and a quote from Some Like it Hot ("Look how she moves! It's like Jell-O on springs."), Itís Always Time is an erotic adventure-comedy about the transformation of an insecure geek into a superhero when he accidentally summons a supernatural nymphomaniac out of magical lime gelatin. Their story is a twisted fairytale version of the three act "Boy Meets Girl" plot where the classical obstacles to romance are embodied by a super-villainess made out of cherry gelatin and devilís food pudding and a horde of sorority sex zombies.
So, this is a pretty traditional story of Boy meets Goo
. No typo there, we mean that our main character, Deiter Detwiler, meets, and subsequently mates, a woman made out of living gelatin- Created by his own hand to boot. And that is not the point where things get weird.
It's Always Time (IAT for short) is a Web Original
'Erotic Farce' written by author-figure Oblimo Oblissimo, located at http://oblimo.pbworks.com/
. The story follows a traditional Epic framework with enough twists to make pretzels feel bad for themselves- Starting with the fact that some of the concepts are based at that most infamous of Image Boards
And with no further ado, the actual tropes of IAT.
Oh yeah- Not Safe for Work
is putting things very, very mildly.
- Anachronic Order: There's a Time Skip, and the story opens with Dee making the Jell-O and thinking How We Got Here.
- Applied Phlebotinum: The stories main engine, nanomek/novilunium is nanomachines meets Functional Magic. And then there's the heroine, who is Made of Phlebotinum.
- Author Appeal: Shockingly not- The author was spurred to make the stories by various members of 4chan's /d/, and doesn't actually prefer ladies of the gelatinous variety. Although the fact that the entire female cast is lustful and dangerous is a bloody giveaway.
- Ax-Crazy: Black Cherry fits the bill to a T. Or a Bee.
- Breaking the Fourth Wall: An entire character dedicated to it, in a fashion- The self-named Tomoe Exposition (a more accurate, direct name is never given, apart from a few hints here and there.) There are several Intermission-style breaks where she speaks directly to the audience from her... reading chair.
- Genre Savvy: Dee, being exactly the type of geek who would read the story he figures he's in.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: BC spends the entire story trying to get Dee's man-mojo, but she had already raped Yves, so she had really imprinted on him instead.
- Horny Devils: Black Cherry again, with a vengeance- This loosely (ha!) also applies to her Zombie Whorde.
- Interspecies Romance
- I Read It for the Articles: Even if you don't enjoy the fetishes in question, it can still be an entertaining read.
- The Little Shop That Wasn't There Yesterday: Guess what type of store Tomoe runs, and guess where Dee gets the thickener. You're wrong. SRT medical supplies is a standard store that just happens to be run by a witch and sell Applied Phlebotinum, though Dee expects it to be this.
- Meta Origin: Everything (and we mean everything) originates from someone's (or something's) fetishes.
- Meaningful Name: Dee (/d/: Hentai/Alternative), Ursula (/u/: Yuri), and Yves (/y/: Yaoi) are named after 4chan boards, and have the sexual orientations to match. A guy named Kay was also briefly mentioned as having gone to Iraq. /k/ is 4chan's weapons board. Add in Viggo the video game addict (/vg/) and the rather self-explanatory Bee, and the entire story turns into Shout-Out Theme Naming.
- Phallic Weapon: SB's penis turns into a sword when (s)he detaches it. At the end, (s)he makes Yves a second sword from her body.
- Porn Tropes: Deliberately employed in the B-plot with the Zombie Whorde.
- Rape IS Okay When Its Female On Male: When a reader raised a querulous voice about the men sexually assaulted by the Zombie Whorde, Oblimo clarified that the sex was reluctant rather than actively non-consensual. Glad that's cleared up. It is definetely not okay with Black Cherry's rape of Yves.
- Seen It All: Tomoe Exposition is a clear Type 3, and knows it.
- Shout-Out : Many, although one deserves to be pointed out. In Act 3, chapter 3, we find out the the aforementioned /U/rsula is a witch, who was part of a group that played D&D as kids. In her group, there was a girl named Marcie who had a thief named Black Leaf, who died in-game. It is implied that she committed suicide. In the infamous Dark Dungeons strip by Jack Chick there is a girl named Marcie who kills herself after her Thief, Black Leaf dies.