History Main / IdTellYouButThenIdHaveToKillYou

* ''Anime/CowboyBebop'' episode Stray Dog Strut. Punch uses this line when his co-host Judy asks what a "data dog" is.

* ''WebOriginal/ShadowrunStorytime'': The artifact in the last mission is a [[spoiler:dragon egg]] and it's heavily implied the parents are [[spoiler:Lofwyr and Hestaby]]. The Johnson tells a curious Dervish not to ask any more questions about this matter or he'll be eaten.

A common modern comedy subversion is to have one character say the phrase to another with the response "So it's classified?" they then answer "no, I just feel like killing you."

* Music/TheStupendium's ''Can't Teach This'', based on VideoGame/TwoPointCampus, features a couplet from an espionage lecturer who drops one of these about [[ParodiedTrope disclosing where the classroom even is]].

** Since all [=PCs=] have [[JustifiedExtraLives five clones]] at the start, some player might get cheeky and agree to the terms of the trope, thinking that they can just tell the group with their next clone life. The book says if a member of the group presses for information based on this, have him escorted away by Internal Security, and then his clone backup arrives missing a few skill points, and no recollection of what he was told. (His clone got brainscrubbed before being released to the party.)

* ''TabletopGame/{{Paranoia}}'': one suggested variant on "That information is outside your security clearance" is...well, this trope. Occasionally, not only is the information outside your security clearance, ''the fact that the information is outside your security clearance'' is outside your security clearance.

Often heard in settings related to espionage and high security levels, the phrase "I'd tell you, [[HeKnowsTooMuch but then I'd have to kill you]]" is itself probably a DeadHorseTrope by this point -- whether for a serious straight use or not.

Nowadays used much more tongue in cheek to poke fun at [[ClassifiedInformation stern security protocols and classification]], it has started to show signs of decay since it's hard to pass off a StockPhrase as an original joke. Instead it's more common to get it as one character's joke to another, perhaps to demonstrate that character's lack of regard to the rigmarole of secrecy or mockery of the ''other'' character's clearance/understanding.

* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10359113/5/Tempest-of-the-Fae Tempest of the Fae]]'' a goblin operating the mine cart Harry, Hermione and Luna ride in says "If I told you, you'd have to kill me." The stated rationale is that while it isn't ''technically'' illegal for them to be in possession of that particular information, offering it freely would count as treason.
* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4279293/3/Bleeding-Clown Bleeding Clown]]'' Harry and Snape communicate via two-way journal over the summer. Harry asks where Snape stays when he's not at Hogwarts.

* ''FanFic/ToHellAndBackArrowverse'': [[Franchise/TheFlash Barry]] says exactly this to Caitlin regarding his League of Assassins training. He's really not joking, and even regards the act as a Mercy Kill, knowing that the League would do worse.

* In the premiere episode of ''Series/BandOfBrothers'', Nixon already knows where the unit is going, and teases Winters with this phrase. Nixon clearly wants to share the information, but Winters refuses to ask, so Nixon just tells him anyway.

* ''Series/TheJamieFoxxShow'': An episode revolved around Aunt Helen's pies which were utterly irresistible. Jamie manages to convince her to commission them out to banquet fiction and they meet the quota. But the night before they're to be shipped off, Jamie gives into temptation and ends up eating ''all'' of them. Luckily Helen foresaw this and had some backups hidden away to replace the eaten ones. At the end Jamie asks what she puts in the pies to make them so good, to which she replies with this trope.
* In the ''Series/{{Leverage}}'' episode "The Boys Night Out Job", Police detective Bonano asks Eliot Spencer's friend what he does for a living. His reply is to cite this trope by name, and they all laugh, until Eliot says:

* ''Series/{{Batwoman|2019}}'': Played for dark laughs in one episode, when [[PsychoForHire Victor Zsasz]] shows up at Mary's clinic, cheerfully explaining that he has to "clean up a little mess" as the two of them have "ruffled some of the same feathers" . When Mary asks if said feathers belong to [[BigBad Safiyah]], Zsasz responds with this line... and then goes ahead and tells her anyway, since killing her was what he came to do in the first place.

-->Well, since you ask me for a tale of espionage, treason and people in suits looking out of windows with rain running down them. ([[AmbiguousSyntax The windows I mean, not the suits]]), it so happens that I could tell you such a story, but then I would have to kill you! Hahahaha! Oh, no, wait. This is a story about how I used to be a spy, so I ''could'' tell you, but then I [[SincerityMode would have to kill you]]. It's all right, though; I was going to kill you anyway.

* Happened in ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'' in a briefing between general Xinchub, some UNS Govt guy dealing with the same secret projects that ran into each others, and a major not cleared for one of them, who [[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2003-02-09 was stupid enough to ask a clarifying question]] which [[HeKnowsTooMuch made the issue moot]].

* Referenced in ''WesternAnimation/KimPossible''. A soldier working on a top secret project blurts out "Neutronalizer" during Wade's briefing. Mr. Dr. Possible asks "This isn't one of those, 'I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you' sort of things, is it?" The soldier pauses awkwardly and tells everyone to just forget what they heard.

* In ''WesternAnimation/StevenUniverse'', Amethyst jokingly said this to young Greg Universe when he asks of Rose's whereabouts.

Often heard in settings related to espionage and high security levels, the phrase "I'd tell you, [[HeKnowsTooMuch but then I'd have to kill you]]" is itself probably a DeadHorseTrope by this point - whether for a serious straight use or not.

* [[spoiler:Loki]] says this in ''Literature/AmericanGods'' - the Fat Kid [[GenreBlindness naturally]] [[SarcasticConfession assumes he's kidding]]. When the kid replies that yes, he really does want to know... he tells him. [[SubvertedTrope And then he kills him]].

* ''Literature/TheHonourableSchoolboy'' by Creator/JohnLeCarre - Ricardo explains his monologuing problem to Jerry: "You confuse me, Voltaire. If I tell you too much, I have to shoot you. I'm a very talkative person, you follow me? I get lonely up here, it is my disposition always to be lonely. I like a guy, I talk to him, then I regret myself. I remember my business commitments, follow me?"

* ''Series/TheWestWing'': Season 7- Ep. 10 ''Running Mates'' (00:23:42 on the time bar), communications officer Will Bailey applauds deputy national security advisor Kate Harper for ''not'' using the line. (He also mentions how alluring he finds the fact that she actually ''could'' kill him with her bare hands...)

* ''VideoGame/TheLegendaryStarfy 5'': Moe asks [[OldMaster Old Man Lobber]] who the leader of the bad guys is, which Lobber interprets as [[BreakingTheFourthWall “who’s the last boss”]] and says a [[NeverSayDie more E-rated version]] of this trope. [[spoiler: He really meant it, because HE’S the last boss.]]

->''You now know too much about this trope. [[BoomHeadshot *BANG*'']]

->''You now know too much about this trope. *BANG*''

** In [[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20130201 this strip]] Der Kestle declines to reveal information about [[spoiler:Airman Higgs]] to Zeetha, as doing so would require Zeetha to be killed, and it has reluctantly decided Zeetha's importance to the Heterodyne is greater than the entertainment value of this.

* ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'': Vetinari (then a young assassin) in ''Literature/{{Night Watch|Discworld}}'' -- "I'd tell you but then I'd have to find someone to pay me to kill you."

* In the Film/HammerHorror film ''Film/TheseAreTheDamned'' (1963), government scientist Bernard gives his mistress Freya the quote below. [[spoiler:He's not lying either, as he kills Freya at the end of the movie after explaining the project he's working on.]]

* VideoGame/TheLegendaryStarfy 5: Moe asks [[OldMaster Old Man Lobber]] who the leader of the bad guys is, which Lobber interprets as [[BreakingTheFourthWall “who’s the last boss”]] and says a [[NeverSayDie more E-rated version]] of this trope. [[spoiler: He really meant it, because HE’S the last boss.]]