Hellfire Commentaries (stylized as HellfireComms) is a commentary group based mainly on
-style riffs on various video games, movies and television episodes.Members of the group include:
. The complete reading can be found
- Aborted Playthrough: Their second run of Sonic '06 — lack of material and/or interest got the better of them.
- Actually Pretty Funny: FTA's line during the Sonic Unleashed playthrough (before the Dark Moray boss), which could be considered an Incredibly Lame Pun if not for the fact that NTom applauded him for it:
NTom: What's a moray?
FTA: When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie, that's a moray.
(clapping) Well done, that is actually well deserved.
Helldragon: You have to hold down square for it to work, Tom.
You have to hold down Square? Isn't that what Enix
have been doing for years?
. That was good
. (Helldragon, regarding Tom
I really have nothing else to say other than compare Xemnas to a penis.
But he is a spiky penis, which apparently some animals have, I don't know!note
NTom: Well, he is a little bit of a Dick.
Helldragon and NTom: *laugh*
- In the Disaster Movie commentary, both Tom and Ron were genuinely amused when the main character was accidentally impaled by Prince Caspian, even though it was only a dream sequence.
- They also decided this about a single joke in The Harlem Globetrotters Meet Snow White (the fact that the dwarfs eat shortcake for dessert).
- A God Am I: After God dies in Elevator Source, Tom declares himself the new God with Doritos, soda, tea and a new heaven for everyone.
- All Is Well That Ends Well: From the Sonic Adventure playthrough:
Tails: All's well that ends well, right?
FTA: THE CITY'S BEEN FUCKING DESTROYED!
- Ambiguously Gay: Done several times, almost always by FTA.
- Anachronic Order: The Disney-thon — of the commentaries that were finished, most of them were recorded out of order.
- Analogy Backfire: In the Brütal Legend playthrough — Tom compares their own group's Power Trio to that of Ed, Edd n Eddy, but after assigning Daniel as Ed and Ron as Edd, he finds that the remaining pair (himself and Eddy) don't match at all.
- And Call Him George: In the Half-Life 2 playthrough, they decide to name a random scanner "Barry" before destroying it with the crowbar. They do it again later with a pair of Antlions after obtaining a pheropod, naming one of them Mr. Kitty.
- Angrish: "Restart your sentence, kthnx." (NTom, to FTA after a bout of this trope during the Sonic '06 playthrough)
- Tom himself isn't immune to this, as he and Ron slipped into it a few times during the X-Men Origins: Wolverine commentary.
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: Helldragon sums up Dragonball Evolution:
- Awesome McCoolname: "Hellfire", natch.
- A Wizard Did It: During the first Sonic '06 playthrough, when asked by FTA to explain things like plot-holes, magic mirrors, and all sorts, Tom's answer is almost always "Magic".
Tom: Don't question the logic of this game, because there is none.
- He uses the "Magic" explanation quite frequently, actually (along with "Don't bother questioning video game logic").
- Atomic F-Bomb: "Excuse me for ten seconds, please *leaves computer* WHAT THE FUCK!"
- Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: Despite NTom and FTA's constant arguing and insults, there are times when they'll actually agree. Not much, though...
- Berserk Button: Don't bring up the Captain mission from Sonic '06 to FTA, trust us on that one. When that came around, he completely snapped:
...WHAT?! You're fucking jo- please tell me you're joking on that, please tell me, tell me he
, I, just, ....e-e-excuse me for ten seconds please..." (Leaves his mic) "WHAT THE FUCK?! GRAAAAAAHH!"note
- Don't EVER call their playthroughs "Lets Plays", unless you want NTom to kill you.
- Also, never call Greatzombieron by his real name, or he will end you.
- While this one may just played for laughs, Gareth seemed to be quite upset that the Mega Drive was called the Genesis.
- Better Than a Bare Bulb: Invoked quite a few times, and finally noted by name, thanks to Tom in the Half-Life 2 playthrough.
- Beware the Nice Ones: While Tom is usually the calm one of the group, he did lose it during the ball puzzle from Silver's Dusty Desert from Sonic '06.
- Bias Steamroller: MBM has a searing hatred against SEGA and Sonic the Hedgehog. He insists that the hatred is merely lukewarm or tepid though.
- Big Damn Heroes: Usually in streams if a member who is streaming (Like Sparanda for example)they can temporarily negate the "No backseat gaming" rule and ask for help. If it gets serious enough then they can ask mods in the chat or other HFC members for help if they are available. (like Spar did with Ntom in the blind Zelda wind-waker stream)
- Book Ends: In the Sonic '06 commentary, the first line Tom says after introducing himself is "This is a loading screen." Then, during the Sonic Unleashed commentary, Tom utters this once again before Perfect Dark Gaia is revealed.
FTA: Oh, God, it's Sonic '06 all over again!
- Another example (albeit unintentional) happens in the Pokemon Destiny Deoxys commentary. At the beginning, Helldragon mistakenly states that Pokemon 3 was not released in Western theaters. Tom corrects him. Then at the end, Tom mistakenly states that Pokemon Ranger And The Temple Of The Sea was the last movie to feature the original voice actors. Helldragon corrects him.
- Kingdom Hearts II. In the segment directly after the prologue, Helldragon says the Innocent Innuendo quoted in the YMMV page, and Tom asks him to rephrase it. Then, before the finale (The World That Never Was), their roles are reversed:
Tom: Well, Goofy goes into Sora when he does Valor Form.
Helldragon: Rephrase that, Tom.
Tom: Okay, he penetrates Sora's being and disappears.
- Brick Joke: DiZ's computer room. "Hey look, this guy's got 13 games of World of Warcraft going on at the same time..."
- Broken Aesop: Sonic 06:
FTA: If your parents are dead, and the only friend you ever had is about to be erased from history, just smile!
- Butt Monkey: A little bit of everyone, but mostly Tom.
- IRTundraboy, on this site, having perused it during the Half-Life 2 playthrough, felt left out at it making no mention of him.
- Call Back: In the KHII playthrough — upon visiting the Hundred Acre Woods, there's some discussion similar to when they visited the area in the first game.
- In the Sonic CD playthrough, FTA references the later parts of the Sonic Unleashed playthrough (his previous appearance, nine months prior) several times.
getting made?", "when's CD
getting made?", fucking today!
- Camp Straight: Skyler. Doesn't really help that he seemed perfectly okay with the prospect of dressing up as Classic Amy and dancing for FTA.
- "Hey, boys... do you know Classic Amy?" (Skyler)
- Catch Phrase: Each member has at least one.
- "BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATS!" (Helldragon)
- "Awesomesauce." (FTA)
- "I don't know/care!" (Helldragon)
- "Well; wasn't that wonderful?" (NTom, at the end of each Dramatic Reading video)
- "Hello, I'm N Tom 64, and welcome to [insert playthrough]."
- "Welcome back to the [insert playthrough] playthrough."
- "Sky-Neville" and "Sky-Jesus", among other things starting with the prefix 'Sky' (N Tom, Skyward Sword)
- Celebrity Resemblance: In the Brütal Legend playthrough, Ron jokingly noted a resemblance between Tom and Jack Black. Tom denied this.
- Chekhov's Gag: Parasite Cage. First seen in the Kingdom Hearts playthrough, then given a Call Back in the Sonic '06 playthrough, and brought up again in the Kingdom Hearts II playthrough upon encountering Mecha-Cage.
- Cherry Tapping: Tom does this at times during the Kingdom Hearts 2 playthrough. A notable example involves finishing Xaldin with the Goofy Rocket.
- Chuck Norris Facts: This video.
- Cloud Cuckoo Lander: greatzombieron.
- Cluster F-Bomb: During their second take on Sonic '06...
FTA:Fuck the fucking fuckers!
- The Comically Serious: Tom is this in spades.
- Did I Just Say That Out Loud?: When addressing the Schedule Slip in the Sonic and the Black Knight playthrough:
FTA: It's all Tom's fault; blame him.
NTom: Umm, excuse me, who disappeared for a month?
FTA: ...You did.
NTom: ...You didn't even let me know where you were! I thought you died! I'm sorry, did I say that out loud?
- Disney Acid Sequence: NTom and FTA decide that the sixth special stage in Sonic CD is one of these.
- Don't Explain the Joke: Type 2, usually coming from NTom.
- Also given a thorough lampshading.
Helldragon: See, that's how you tell jokes: you tell people the jokes you're going to make, then you make them, then you tell them the joke you just made.
- Dude, Not Funny!: greatzombieron has made one or too quips that may have crossed the line — an autism joke during the Disaster Movie commentary, or a Haiti joke in the Brutal Legend playthrough. NTom and (in the latter case) IRTundraBoy were not amused, either way.
- Dull Surprise: Typically lampshaded whenever it shows up in the works they comment on. For instance, they reference one moment in Kingdom Hearts II thusly:
- Even Evil Has Standards: "Aww, I can't cuss at you, Pooh; that'd just be mean." (Helldragon) Made funnier when NTom does, prompting the following exchange:
Helldragon: -gasp- Tom!
NTom: I'm sorry...
NTom: Isn't that a bit extreme?
Helldragon: Extreme is how we do everything here on Hellfire Commentaries, Tom!
- Everything's Worse with Bees: As of Kingdom Hearts II, bees have started to become NTom's equivalent to Helldragon's Goddamned Bats.
- Fanboy: While FTA is quite the Sonic fanboy, The Helldragon is a massive fan of Transformers.
- Fan Fic: Brought up (and mocked) on occasion.
Helldragon: And thus, thousands of fanfictions were born...
- Fantastic Racism: Helldragon's racist against technology — NTom dubbed him a "techist".
Helldragon: AHLALALA! NTom seems to be like this with snowmen
- Filler: One time, due to not having enough time to record more Half-Life 2, NTom, and IRTundraBoy (later Greatzombieron) instead opted to record some more Brütal Legend — exploring, collecting all the legends/songs, etc.
- Now Tom and Ron have done a commentary on X-Men Origins: Wolverine, for a similar reason.
- Four-Man Band: In Sonic 3 And Knuckles, this is how it goes:
- Five-Man Band
- Follow the Leader: A good example is BrainScratch Commentaries. They now have their own page.
- Fun with Acronyms: During the Half-Life 2 playthrough, Tom deduced what the DCE in RandomDCE stood for, as a joke.
Tom: Digest Cookies, Everyone!
- Gag Dub: It's been done by NTom, FTA, TheHelldragon, RandomDCE, and greatzombieron.
- The Ghost: Any playthrough that was on Tom's old YouTube page. They were deleted along with his old account, and were unable to be backed up due to Tom lacking an external hard-drive at the time.
- Gratuitous Japanese: Ron and Daniel slip into this during the Half-Life 2 playthrough, for no real reason.
- Goddamned BAAAAAAATS: Helldragon's worst in-universe enemy.
- Go Mad from the Revelation: Tom and DCE very nearly lost their sanity during the dramatic reading of Twilight. DCE even described their insane breakdown with excessive Purple Prose, just like Twilight would have.
- Gone Horribly Right: Whenever they do commentary on something, but forget just how bad or ridiculous it actually is (or are well aware, and go with it anyway), with predictable results. X-Men Origins: Wolverine, The Adventures of SharkBoy and LavaGirl, and Dragonball Evolution are all good examples, and possibly Sonic '06 as well.
- Heroic BSOD: This occurred during their first Sonic '06 playthrough (during the Trial of Love), when a glitch led Tom to believe that you had to choose Elise in order to proceed.
- Hijacked by Ganon: During a podcast from NTom64 and Helldragon, they spent some time discussing their problems with some instances of this trope.
- Hurricane of Puns: NTom has indulged in this from time to time, much to the chagrin of his cohorts.
- Part 120 of the Kingdom Hearts Playthrough nearly has ten minutes of "fucking game puns."
- Ice-Cream Koan: IRTundraboy's random ancient Chinese wisdom:
IRTundraboy: Man with broom have no use for river!
- I Meant to Do That: NTom has done this a few times.
FTA: Sure you did, Tom, sure you did.
- He has also attempted to justify this on a few occasions, such as during the second Sonic '06 playthrough:
Helldragon: (after Sonic runs into a wall of spikes) Well, why'd you do that?
NTom: Because he deserves it, okay?
- Implacable Man: Apparently, Parasite Cage, later showing up as Mecha-Cage, and even later, Proto-Cage.
- Incredibly Lame Pun: Done quite a few times. Lampshaded during the Half-Life 2 playthrough:
Tom: I make lame puns into an art-form, alright?
Ron: No, you make an art-form even lamer.
- In an attempt to fight back against Tom's puns, Helldragon has delved into this as well. ("Terrable!")
- Informed Ability: AxelRyman, BigAl2K6, Captainblue50, and LuizPrower are all members of the group, despite not having appeared too often, if at all.
- They have appeared in commentaries, but most of them aren't available. Axel starred in an Ocarina of Time playthrough (cancelled), Alan starred in a commentary of the Super Mario Bros. movie, Captainblue50 was in the Ben10 live-action film commentary with DCE, along with a Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas playthrough (cancelled), and Luiz starred in a Sonic Rewards Compilation playthrough (removed).
- Cloud8745 was also a member briefly for 5 videos or so of the Pokemon Emerald playthrough (removed) before THD was a regular.
- Luiz was also involved in something Street Fighter related, but it was never released.
- Insult Backfire: This exchange during the Sonic and the Black Knight playthrough:
FTA: Well, you sound like a homosexual robot with a bad cold.
NTom: ...That's the weirdest insult I've ever received; thank you.
- It Makes Sense in Context: On one of the comments in their Pokepark 2 live stream on Youtube, someone says 'Hellfircoms... Learn interesting facts like where the term Lolita came from!' Tom replied with this.
To anyone else reading this comment: It makes sense in context, I swear!'
- Jerk Ass: FastestThingAlive fits this to a T.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Helldragon
- Leave the Camera Running: During a live stream, Tom once forgot that there was a level after the final boss of Sonic Colors, and went to get a drink, expecting the credits to roll. He came back missing about ten lives.
- Lost Aesop: In the High School Musical commentary, Helldragon gets into a rather intellectual rant about why movies like the above movie and Twilight are possible, only to go on to how if High School Musical had vampires, it would be better.
- Lost Forever: The commentaries for the Pokemon movies have been taken down due to copyright issues. There was a brief period where you could download copies of the tracks, but many people missed it, and will never see them again.
- Averted. As of 2013, the Pokemon movies are once again downloadable on their forums.
- Zigzagged. Now that their website is defunct, this includes their forums and any links on it. The Pokemon movies are once again lost. A few are available via links on this pastebin, but many of the videos are broken and don't cover the entire movie.
- Memetic Badass: The Disney-thon spawned a couple of them for the commentators — Coach Bolton (High School Musical) and Persian Wolverine (Aladdin and the King of Thieves).
- Metaphorgotten: Helldragon compares the Egg Genesis boss fight to the downfall of SEGA:
- Also later, as the boss is crashing:
Helldragon: Oh no, here comes SEGA's decline in the console market; run!
- In the Unleashed playthrough, Tom indulges in it as well.
A Sonic Unleashed
playthrough without boosting is like a sandwich without a filling! It makes no sense if it's just bread!
- Mind Screw: Tom pulls this on Ron in the Brutal Legend playthrough.
- A slightly meta example, but have you seen some of the stuff they've commented on? The Harlem Globetrotters Meet Snow White, etc.
- MST: How they usually go by their commentaries.
- Especially their dramatic readings.
- Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Apparently, High School Musical.
Helldragon: YES. Robot Ghost Ninja Vampire High School. Best school ever!
- Never Say That Again: "Don't you ever. Ever. Use my full name." (NTom, in response to FTA referring to him as "Thomas")
- Noodle Incident: Ron's driving endeavors.
- "No. Just... No" Reaction: During the Disaster Movie commentary, greatzombieron reacts to one of NTom's jokes this way. To make sense of it, the movie currently showed a character pinned to the ground with the spear from a collapsed statue:
I don't even know what the point is, to this whole thing... Tom:
Well, the point is on the end of the spear.
is heard, followed by an audible slapping noise.)
Helldragon: What is that structure in the background, the one with the big fuckin hole in it, what is that?
Tom: Looks to be part of an oval office, if you will.
Helldragon:... Nooo, Tom. Noooo...
- Oh, Crap: In the Alice in Wonderland comm, when Tom realizes that he accidentally pressed Ron's Berserk Button.
- Only Known by Their Nickname: Helldragon
- The Plan: NTom64 and Helldragon wild mass guess this to be how the plot of Kingdom Hearts II got started, complete with David Xanatos himself.
- It's gotten to a point where they believe that Xanatos was responsible for not only the creation of the Cage legacy (Parasite Cage, Mecha-Cage, Proto-Cage), but also for Nomura letting no TV series be included in Kingdom Hearts.
- In the Super Mario Galaxy 2: Stream playthrough: The two worlds that are multiples of three were both 12 parts long, which is also a multiple of three! As a response, NTom said "Funny how things work out like that."
- Also, he just happened to be playing the game on the third-year anniversary of Hellfire Commentaries.
- Plucky Comic Relief: Helldragon
- Police Are Useless: Pointed out by Captainblue50 in their Ben 10: Race Against Time commentary.
- The Power of Rock: The Brütal Legend playthrough, natch.
- Power Trio:
- NTom, FTA, and TheHelldragon. (Not in any playthrough, but the three have appeared in livestreams and such.)
- NTom, greatzombieron, and IRTundraboy. (Brutal Legend, Half-Life 2)
- NTom, FTA and SonicMovies (The Sonic Heroes playthrough)
- Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: "Must... talk... in... fragments!" (Helldragon)
- Pungeon Master: NTom64.
- Quintessential British Gentleman: Lampshaded by Tom on a number of occasions.
NTom: Yes, I'm actually drinking tea; I'm that much of a stereotype.
- In their Half-Life 2 playthrough, they even call him out on it; and he openly admits it.
NTom: A true gentleman uses an FAQ to solve puzzles in a children's puzzle game.
- Ragtag Bunch of Misfits
- Reed Richards Is Useless: The commentary for Destiny Deoxys, which takes place in a futuristic city displaying a markedly higher level of general technology than anywhere else in the Pokémon world.
NTom: Seriously, we can't put it towards curing cancer? No, just Pokémon battles? Ok.
- Refuge in Audacity: The Ben 10: Race Against Time commentary.
- Reset Button: At the end of their Pokémon: The First Movie commentary, when Mewtwo wipes the minds of everyone, he also wipes the minds of NTom and Helldragon, and they forget the entire commentary.
- Running Gag: At least one per commentary, as well as some general ones that span from comm to comm. Some notable ones:
- In The Sonic the Hedgehog 4 Episode 2 commentary: "I played this game," and any variation of it.
- In the SMG 2 playthrough, "Duck-face."
- "'Ello, I'm NTom Thixty-Four."
- "Welcome to the (video game name) playthrough where we talk about (completely unrelated subject)."
- "Yes! Kill all the bats!"
- "Even without wings, I can still fly!"
- The Matrix: Path of Neo: "Shoryuken!"
- Half-Life 2:
- Greatzombieron saying he can get through the entire game without getting attacked by a barnacle, then getting constantly attacked by them. Tom and TundraBoy keep reminding Ron about his earlier remark.
- Also, Ron claiming he's the the Half-Life expert of the group, and then failing at random points in the game.
- Whenever the NPC who modeled Gordon Frohman and John Freeman shows up, Tom will quote either Full-Life Consequences or Quarter-Life: Half-Way to Destruction. And then shoot the NPC.
- Aladdin and the King of Thieves: "Take a drink!"
- Alice in Wonderland: "It's a living."
- During the Prince of Persia stream, "EDGY" for Warrior Within, "sand cancer" for Two Thrones, and "YOLO is the definition of this game" for the reboot.
- Rule of Cool: They decide that Brütal Legend's "Bring It On Home" solo runs on this.
- Also quoted verbatim by Helldragon during their Sonic '06 playthrough:
But it would be the best
reason... 'cause it'd be kickass — Rule of Cool
, people, come on.
- Sanity Slippage: A mild case; whenever the work they're commenting on stops making sense, their commentary starts to fall apart, often with hilarious results.
- Say My Name: FTA likes making fun of Tom's "Hello, I'm NTom64" intro line (see Running Gag above). Tom's actually called him out on it once or twice.
- Self-Deprecation: Tom is this in spades, usually for minuscule/non-existent reasons. Can even reach the point of Heroic Self-Deprecation on occasion.
- "I was re-watching the Sonic '06 playthrough earlier, and my God, we are boring." (FTA)
- "Daniel, you're recording video game footage for the Internet. I'm pretty sure you've hit rock bottom." (Tom)
- "The American commentator on this Youtube stream is the absolute worst. I say this as a commentator who is also the absolute worst." (Tom)
- "HellfireComms: Please Retsupurae us!" (Helldragon)
- "Oh look, a girl who doesn't like me. What a shocker!" (Helldragon)
- Shameless Self-Promoter/Please Subscribe to Our Channel: Played for Laughs.
- Shout-Out: Several, including Command and Commentary (a fellow Youtube commentary group which FTA is affiliated with), the Something Awful Let's Play forum, Linkara, and The Spoony One, among others.
- Also, in their Half-Life 2 commentary (and later Kingdom Hearts II, among others), they make a shout-out to a very special web page.
- Small Name, Big Ego: Parodied and invoked; see Shameless Self-Promoter above.
NTom: One day, someone's gonna watch this and think we're actually being egotistical.
- Spot of Tea: Tom loves his tea. He even claims that it's his power source.
- And that he can summon it at will.
- The Straight Man: NTom64. IRTundraBoy shows traces of this as well.
- Straight Man and Wise Guy: Tom and FTA (or Tom and Helldragon) keep an act like this going strong.
- Take That: To the material they're commenting on, to themselves, to something completely unrelated, etc.
- The Wiki Rule: Averted; they started a wiki, but eventually scrapped it in favor of a TVTropes page.
- Thing-O-Meter: NTom and TheHelldragon have considered putting a "Sora, Donald, Goofy"-meter in the corner because of the sheer number of times it is spoken by various characters in Kingdom Hearts II early in their playthrough. It is never talked about after the Schedule Slip.
- Trade Snark: Death Laser™!
- And, more recently, the Fractal Tech Gear™.
- Uncancelled: Half-Life 2. Their playthrough of Super Smash Bros. Brawl's story mode will eventually be redone, as well.
- Verbal Tic: Tom used to say "Indeed" quite a few times in earlier playthroughs.
- Also, "This is true."
- And recently, "The Harlem Globetrotters Meet Snow White."
- "Fair enough" - FTA.
- Very Loosely Based on a True Story: Played with in Tom's and BigAl's Super Mario Bros. movie commentary.
BigAl: This is happening now, this is based on a true story.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: NTom and... possibly everyone.
Greatzombieron: This is why every day with you... is pain. Constant... pain.