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alt title(s): Convection Shmonvection; Convection Smonvection
Nothing says fun like a battle inside an active volcano!

"Professor! Lava! Hot!"
- Professor Farnsworth, Futurama

"The lava might be scary, but it's only like a very hot bubble bath."
- Raocow, in a You Tube Let's Play of the 2ch VIP2 Super Mario World romhack

Lava, primal force, essence of destruction that leaves behind fertile land. Really, really hot.

As awesome as lava is, most TV writers and video game developers forget that last part. The hero is making his way through the Lethal Lava Land, but wait! There are floating rocks, he can make it across in a really dramatic way! Except, in the real world, the rising heat would have fried him already. (And rocks do not float in lava.) Put your hand above a barbecue (or even a candle) and you have an idea of how hot that room, or cave, or Collapsing Lair should be. While it's possible for the outer layer of lava to cool, forming an insulating shell where the inner layer flows but people can get close to it relatively safely as long as they don't touch it, this is never seen in fiction where red-hot lava flows as free and exposed as ever.

Convection, the process by which a liquid or gas (like air) forms currents that very quickly spread heat from a hot thing to its environment, does not exist in TV land. Convection Schmonvection - as long as you don't touch the lava, you're okay. Has anyone ever used an oven, by any chance? No.

Note that as used in this trope, convection also includes heat radiation as well.

TV also ignores the other hazards of volcanoes and lava flows, such as toxic gases and blinding, choking ash.

Although lava is the primary offender, this also applies to any time convection is ignored for the sake of Rule Of Cool, such as when a character is standing above or near a large fire or any other extreme heat source. If you don't touch the raging inferno, boiling lake, or white-hot walls, you'll be fine.

For some reason, the reverse is demonstrated a bit more realistic; characters will feel cold in a cave or other area that's in perpetual winter, or frigid enough to have ice form on the walls. However, as long as they bundle up, the most they'll ever get is a longing for some hot cocoa and a warm fireplace.

Keep in mind this can be Art Major Physics just as much as You Fail Physics Forever.

See also: Lava Pit, Battle Amongst The Flames, Do Not Touch The Funnel Cloud, and Harmless Freezing. Toasted Buns is a related trope.

A complete but no more accurate inversion is Space Is Cold, where there is no convection, but TV acts as though there is.

Examples:

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Chekhovs VolcanoLava TropesLava Is Red Hot Water
Conjunction MalfunctionSublime RhymeThe Convenient Store Next Door
AirshipThe RPG Cliches GameAmbidextrous
Blown Across The RoomYou Fail Physics ForeverLava Is Red Hot Water
Conspicuously Selective PerceptionAcceptable Breaks From RealityCritical Encumbrance Failure
Complaining About Shows You Don't WatchDid Not Do The ResearchCool Clear Water