gaze in miror at yore strange unatural beauty
a chiz is a swiz or a swindle as any fule kno.
nigel molesworth, gorila of 3b and curse of st custards
, is a brittish skoolboy from the 1950s whose poor speling do not hold him back from rekording his GRATE THORTS about skool, life, foopball, grown-ups, GURLS, interplanetry travel ect ect chiz chiz.
His jaded and world-weary comentary hav been fathefully transcribed
by Geoffrey Willans and georgously ilustrated by Ronald Searle of St. Trinian's
fame in four volumes (pub. grabber and grabber): Down with Skool!
, How to be Topp
, Whizz for Atomms
and Back in the Jug Agane
There are also the masters aka beaks viz. headmaster GRIMES, sigismund the mad maths master ect, and of coarse the skool dog.
The golden prose hem-hem of our hero hav been enjoyed by generations of tiny pupils and often continue to hold its allure into adulthood. molesworth fans are a rare but rabid breed who rekognise each other by use of sekrit code phrases such as 'cheers cheers cheers', 'poo er gosh' and 'as any fule kno'.
This series provide xsampls of:
- Author Catchphrase - molesworth is positivly Homeric in his use of epithets coo er posh prose eh
- A Very British Christmas - molesworths discriptive powers at their finest
- Boarding School of Horrors - the masters are all teddy boys and they will rip you with a botle for two pins
- Bold Inflation - ALLCAPS gets used for emphasis in fairly random places
- British Accents - well, british slang, teknically
- Class Trip - a visit to a farm and a trip on ye flying scotsman
- Corrupt Corporate Executive - grabber & grabber, purveyors of various dangerous-sounding toys to the tinys, and one stop shop for any Bland Name Product required by the 'plot'
- Everybody Hates Mathematics - when he ask the point of maths molesworth is told that maths is a langwidge
- Funetik Aksent
- Funny Foreigner - molesworth seems to spend his langwidge lessons imagining himself as 'molesvitch' or 'Don Jereth Molethworth' in a Theme Park Version of the relevant country.
- Homage - various day-dreams and piktorial interludes feature the adventures of 'interplanetary clot' Captain molesworth in the style of Dan Dare and similar contemporary "Daring Space-Aces". The sheer number of such characters at the time is Lampshaded by the complaint that non of the various Parody Named Expys of the villains, such as the PUKON and his TREENS, are ever free for thwarting, being booked up till next year, chiz chiz ect
- Off To Boarding School - wot hapen when you annoy your mater and pater too much
- Sadist Teacher - Lots!
- Sketch Comedy - in literary form
- Two-Teacher School - GRIMES and sigismund are the only named beaks, though teachers of lat, fr, geog, hist ect are mentioned in passing.
- Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist
- X Meets Y - Diary of a Wimpy Kid crossed with Neds Declassified, set in Fifties Britain. (mouldy chizz thoze ones came aftur...)